Today I.....

[Jo*mar]

Barb & Dabbo :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

I had a very weird painful wrist awhile ago, from doing the heavy clean up around here. Tweaked the joint, tendon or nerve or something. If i kept using my wrist it would begin to hurt in my elbow and even up into the front of my shoulder. DC thought my ulnar nerve had got pinched or bound up some how - i remember something doing a pop when I lifted those mud boggin tires and after that in the evening was when it started hurting.

At the chiro appt i asked him about it since he had helped my elbow joints when they were hurting a couple yrs ago.
So he asks questions , checks the joints and bones of the wrist and has me lean/brace against the table when it's upright.
He takes my arm/hand and works the joint then gives some medium pulls, jerks, shakes and stretches.
It hurt a little bit more the next day but after than the pains just faded away.
So my hubby has been having a sore wrist too, I told him about what the chiro did for mine- he wouldn't try an appt though - but gave me his arm & wrist to try the same kind of stuff on in it.
He says it helps and has me do that every couple of days- but he has to keep using it at work...:(

Any hoo:) maybe your knee needs something similar dabbo?

[dabbo]

Thats a great idea....I think I'll ask him when I go back on friday.
thank you Jo!!

[DDayMBB]

only a short note.. over my prents right at the moment!!! If I did not have bad luck as the saying goes, my computer crapred out, my link to the world... oh well hope to have a new one soon !!! KEEP safe all and hope pain free, my RSD that has been in my right toes and arch has started to migrate up my shin burning and stabbing fun and with winter each brush of of my pants... ouch!!!! This in addition to the TOS up top and the RSD up top... yeee HAW what a ride. I think the cold weather just perpetuates the whole ball of wax and sure some time in a warm climate would help, Each front that comes past, my body is able to predict better than any forecaster! Than again all of you know what I mean and are in the same boat!!! GOD BLESS ONE AND ALL!!! MARK~N~GOOBER

[LinJane]

Mark Nice to hear from you. Would have liked to meet up with you this week but I'll let you know when I'm coming to see Dr. T.

Well, let's see. I'm getting good at pin care. Lot's of fun. Cleaning the pins on my son's leg. There are four that come at and are attached to a long rod. They have to be cleaned daily so they do not get infected. That would be disasterous. We have a visiting nurse everyother day. The x-rays were very interesting. He has three screws piecing the bone together which I hadn't known about. The staples come out on Monday. I still don't know when he is going to school. I have him working on school work about 1 hour a day to keep him doing something besides tv and video games. He is in good spirits though. Very up beat.

My 17 year old daughter was just made Captain of the Swim Team which made her very happy. It looks good on College Applications also.

Life here is so hectic I never even know what day it is. Hope everyone is well. Linda

[tshadow]

Dabbo -

I think you need to get to an ortho knee surgeon right away - they usually start with three cortisone shots, then the MRI and later arthroscopic surgery on the knee. Hopefully nothing worse and no knee replacement. But well could be that you're scratching bone on bone, or sharp calcium / bone against a ligament, either of which is terribly painful and just gets worse. Of course, I'm going off of past reports I've read, and have no idea what is really going on with you - just ideas here. So get going into that ortho!!! (bossy, aren't I?)

Jo - can we tie you down for a week? I picture you like a whirling dervish and I just want to sit you on the couch and put a t.v. control in your active hands...haha. Actually, you are so great to always be so active. I hope it will keep the TOS as down as possible.

Mark - I've missed you!!! I've been so sick, completely bedridden. The insurance is bugging me with threats to stop benefits because they made a mistake and thought I wasn't at the doctor - then neither the doctor nor my attorney's secretary did anything to fix it - then they got mad at me when I faxed the adjuster the date I was at doctor! So frustrating. Still no referral to the new pain doc - and the PTP's secretary just says, "oh, I haven't seen anything..." That's because SHE's supposed to do the request - NOT the other way around! Frustrating again. Then insurance set up three exams in Bev Hills - untold hours away from me now - I can't travel at all right now - and the latest appt. is in July of 08!

I am so bedridden, and yet, now is when I need to make calls, etc., and I just can't.

Now is when I need my attorney to take some action on my behalf, but they just aren't going to...and PTP is waiting for them to send him some records...the whole thing is really a game of each one pointing the finger at the other, and I'm the only one who does take action and gets chewed out by a secretary who doesn't know the law that I am a beneficiary under the insurance contract and the adjuster is required to administer the claim with me, as for ordinary administrative duties - aside from the litigation. The right of "no contact" is with me, the applicant, NOT her the adjuster - (unless she has a personal harassment action, which is not the case.) I HATE it when people don't know the law...

AAAaaaahhhh, back to bed...enough! The inflammation is so bad - the area around my neck bloats out like miniature pillows...thank God the leg pains are subsiding...

Poor Mark - I hope your pain starts to ease up...the RSD is so painful...do you have deep bone pain also? I wonder if you've developed the fibromyalgia pain.

I am SICK of doctors who do not understand TOS and do not realize the full comport of the syndrome. (If I hear it is "just the nerves going to the hands and once they have PT they recover" anymore I will go on a screaming rampage. Or "somatosization" or whatever it is called - I / we are not imagining this pain, nor is it some crazy impulse, I am positive that there is a real reason, (as in chemicals or blockages too small to detect) that causes the continuing TOS type pain. Stupids have hit the wall with me!!!)

Pray for me to get a handle on my anger right now...

[Jo*mar]

Tam- I must not whirl fast enough LOL cause 5 more pounds have managed to attached themselves to my body:(

Here's some snow pics from the other nite- our first snow this winter

[Shelley]

Great pics jo, that first one looks like it could be on a christmas card.

:grouphug: for the room. I am down for the count with some nasty bronchitis.

[dabbo]

Jo - great pictures....

Shelley- I hope you get over the bronchitis quickly- hacking that junk up is no fun.

Mark- you're right about being able to predict a front before weather forecasters!! We've been having 30 deg. swings in the high every couple of days down here. Tired of it and all the fronts and pain they bring with them.

Tam- Thank you for your concern. I hope you're getting control of the anger over "The Stupids" (I like that term!!).... they are a frustrating group, right??? "its all in your head".... "you're just looking for a fix...." Yeah, I LOVE spending hours in the ER and doc offices. please.
I'm going to an ortho on Tuesday; I had my Primary care doc refer me there last Wed. I wish I could have gotten in last week, because it just gets worse. If i put the littlest bit of pressure on the outside of my quads, near that ligament the INSIDE of my knee feels like a knife jammed into it. Throw that on top of the back of my knee kiling me. sorry for ranting (again).

[dabbo]

today I (revised...)
just went to the minor medical place near here.... I figured it would be better than the ER. Nothing new about the knee though, Doc thinks it is a soft tissue injury and told me to keep my weight off of it until I go to the ortho on Tuesday. SO, now i'm on crutches...err, um, A crutch. watching me walk/hobble will make you laugh!! :D

[tshadow]

dabbo - did he take an Xray? An MRI? Without those, I don't know how he can know what's goin' on...

[dabbo]

My doc took xrays when I saw him 2 weeks ago...they didn't show any bone damage, so it could be (has to be?) soft tissue damage. For now, more meds and ice the knee every so often. yipeeeeee.

[tshadow]

Past three days have almost been entirely in bed, asleep or trying to meditate away pain.

I am wondering who here has had TOS the longest? I think I'll post it.

[Edelweiss]

hope that it was a good monday for all here in the forum.

@dabbo:
I am sorry, that you knee-story is still going on. I know from my own experience that I cannot stand pain in other regions then shoulder/arm/head - what I am used to, but any other pain or handycap especially in the regions that fonctions quite normal. Wish you will know what it is soon.

@LinJane
wish you and your son a lot of patience to support the situation. this is not easy for every one! take care!!!

@jo
last week we had nearly the same white "decoration" and now a warm air came up this weekend and everything is green again. anyway, it is always nice to see trees,...turned into white.

@tamara
I am so sorry to hear you were so bedridden. I really wish you a lot of good meds and therapies to get relief

@Mark
I can understand how difficult it is when the computer crapps down - we are so used to it....hope you will find a new one to be connected again to the world, as you say.
wish you all the best against your pain - winter time is always hard for the muscles and nerfs and I hope you can get relief!!

All the best wishes and very nice greetings
Barbara

[LinJane]

Barbara It is always nice to hear from you. It is so nice to hear from people in different countries. It is just a shame that we are all suffering and going through the same problems.

We got our Christmas tree this weekend and put it up. We brought my son in his wheel chair and it was alot of fun. He was dying to get out of the house. He gets his staples out today. About another month for the pins.

I think I was bitten by a spider. My left elbow has swollen terribly and is red and hot. I'm going to the doctor in an hour. It started Saturday. I was going to go to the hospital but am sick of going there. I tried benedryl but it didn't help. It is like a never ending story around here. Always something!

Hope everyone has a good day! Linda

[tshadow]

LinJane - no,no,no - must go! Spider bites must be seen to be cleared because the wrong types can take too long to heal and actually kill tissue and cause gangrene or lymphodema. Look up lymphodema and see pictures and PLEASE get yourself to the ER or to a good doc and have them make sure you don't need some kind of med to counteract it. PLEASE. My mom ignored hers and it took like a year to finally get her finger cleared up.

Dabbo - hoping that you get some relief on your knee soon, and that the docs do something! YES, you can overcompensate and throw everything out of whack by having a bad knee for even a short time! I used to read reports on that! As soon as my high pain calms, I may call you to bug you to bug your docs to do something more proactive than what they are doing...

Thank you Edelweiss for your kind words to everyone!

Mark - Dday - are you back with us yet?

Much love to all.

[mtnmom]

Linda,

SO glad to hear you have a Dr. appt today! Please let us know what they say!

Last time I walked around with a swollen, tingly and strange colored arm saying "must be an allergic reaction or a spider bite or something..." it actually turned out to be a blood clot, thanks to TOS.

Sorry, I just live in my own little blood clot paranoid world these days... I hope your okay! :eek:

[LinJane]

Thanks for your concern. I went to my MD and he didn't like the way it looked. It is red, swollen and hot. He sent me to a Rheumetologist who drained some of the fluid and sent it to be tested. I belive my life is going to make a great gruesome movie some day.

They put me on antibiotics and I have to go back in 2 days. I asked if this was something to be hospitalized for and they just said that they don't know yet. Made very sure I was taking the anitbiotics 4 times a day, RIGHT AWAY. Kind of scary. I am so tired of hospitals and doctors but you all know about that. I had been concerned about a blood clot because there is a hard lump in my arm. We will see! Thanks again! Linda

[DDayMBB]

Barb... I am up and running again thanks to my parents, they felt sorry for me... I am blessed having such support sorrounding me, including everybody here and I never close my eyes at night without acknowlegeing that in my prayers :hug:!

Shelly... Great seeing you around, don't be such a stranger:)!

Linda... You of all people should be aware of spider bites, sure your husband or one of the employees have been bitten crawling in dark damp places or in the vents anywho they are bad... well your son getting the staples out lessen the chances of infection now just have to keep up around the pins... this must be killing him being away from his friends. When you rescedule with Dr T let me know and we'll see about meeting for lunch or dinner be nice to put a person with the name ;).

Tam... hope you start feeling better, I miss those chats we have:Talkative:... it is amazing being able to share conversation with somebody going through some of the same things you are.

Dabbo... spending any time in Drs offices stinks!!! Anyone here surely would agree that we all spent way to much time at the doctors and it is no longer a choice... glad to hear that nothing is broken, than again as the old saying goes a sprain could be worse than a break I know I usually have a black cloud over me:cool: hope & pray this is not the case with you and may you heal quickly!

MOM... That sounds absolutely scarey...did you have surgery in the outlet region? I know you said about being on coumadin, until now I was unsure as to why you were taking it. Hope for your sake that is the end of those nasty boogers:mf_swordfight:!

Jo... I agree with everbody else they are some great pics:Good-Post: !

H/O... just checking to see how you are making out in the UK with the snow and foul weather... for the most part you are not used to getting that terrible mess are you. Unfortunately we see it at the least once a week till spring comes about:thud:!

Dawn... how's your breathing??? did it ease up any, if not is there anything they can do to help you out ?

Oh well this novell has taken me all evening to compose and great pain so I think I shall close at the moment... my deepest appollogies to anyone who I may have left out at this time, just because you were not mentioned does not mean you are not in my toughts!!! So until later

Mark~n~GOOBER

[dabbo]

Di and JoKat..... I hope you gals are doing well.... I don't think I've seen you post in a while, and hope everything is alright.

[johannakat]

Dabbo- crutches and TOS yak! :( I hope you are doing OK.

As for me, just lots of computer work assosciated with something for my daughter so I haven't had the stamina to be around. I am doing OK, still achingly slow forward progress. Actually, just not going backwards feels like progress...:)

hello to everyone and sorry I am not paying much attention righ tnow, I hope to be back sometime soon,
Johanna

[DDayMBB]

am basically just stopping by to say hey to everyone and hope all are doing fine!!!

Mark~nGoober

[dabbo]

Today I.... went to the ortho for my knee. Need an MRI before I can get any answers. He said that some of the areas where it was hurting were worrisome, while some weren't. Don't quite know what to make of it, but I want to get this fixed asap.

Linda- If i remember correctly, you should be getting your test results back on wednesday, right? I hope they come back favorably for you.

[LinJane]

Dabbo, Yes I should get results today. My elbow is still swollen and painful but the hot redness has pretty much gone away. I think the antibiotics are working.

We went to my sons football banquet last night. It is the first time he has really done anything since the accident. I think it was alittle tiresome for him but nice to see all his friends. We're hoping to get him to school next week. I just have to get instructions from his doctor while his coaches are making the arrangements. I think if he goes for a couple of hours a day that would help him.

Hope everyone has a great day! Linda

[tshadow]

Today -

I have to deal with the three exams that the ins. co. (in w/c) set up for me HOURS away from my house, and I can't travel like that at all anymore. So, I've got to make faxes, make calls, etc., practically send up SMOKE SIGNALs to get my attorney's secretary's attention...it IS frustrating folks.

Today -

I am upset because I can't talk to my friends (you TOSers) like I want because my ears / face pain is so bad! Waiting for it to calm down. I think it comes from the TINY bit of paddling I do in the pool with my swim board - holding my head out of water.

Today -

I am thinking about all of the TOSers and hoping you guys all have really wonderful Christmases (or whatever holiday / religion you have.) Lots of love, cheer, maybe a pretty Christmas tree or going for a drive to see pretty lights. Just wanting LOVE for you all.

[mtnmom]

Today - I should be running errands and cleaning the house, maybe even go for a run. But instead Im being lazy and sitting here in my p.j.s with a cup of coffee!

Hope you all have a more productive day than it looks like Im going to have!:D

[DDayMBB]

MOM... Every now and again you need to say what the heck and kick back and relax ... and run the errands later:cool:

Tam... I am worried about how you are feeling, and wish I could provide some answers your way!!! Your worry toward others is admirable,maybe you should start devoting some of that time on yourself, I think people here would understand!;) Do Take Care!!!!

Lin... How's things with the elbow??? Also, how is your son after being out and about, one thing he has going for him is youth they hav a tendency to spring back! Is he doing Crutches, walker or chair?

Dabbo... I can not blame you for wanting to get your knee back in order ASAP, GOD knows you have enough on your plate as is!

Today I... went in for my weekly tune up on my pump, I finally am starting to feel some results from it, the trade off is I am tiered my mouth is dry. What scares me is that once they get me to a high enough level to mask pain somewhat is it possible to damage my body worse by over doing daily tasks etc...?

Unto all I send along my wish for a pain free day!!!

Mark~n~Goober

[momzpeachy]

Today...I cried but in a weird way. I wanted to scream more than cry. I'm upset in a pissed way...if that makes any sense :mad:

I scheduled my appt to meet with the surgeon on the 14th to go over the surgery and all the tests that need to be done prior to the surgery. I was told the surgery will be the beginning of Jan...so I guess I know what my New Year's resolution will be !

Also, Today I am in so much pain and it just won't stop! I have chest pain, back pain, all over pain and I'm tired...very very tired.

[DDayMBB]

Peachy... who are you seeing around here for surgery and who is treating your TOS ??? Luck would have it I was DXed early on by Dr Togut before I had to much run around, unforunately the old boys network in the court system turned me down for workmens comp here in the Valley!!! I, am still tossing it back and forth going out to see to see Dr Sander in Colorado... yeah just waiting for one of these flares for a clot to go to the lungs, brain or heart oh well than it will be quick what else can I say I... welcome by and yes scream away !!!!!!!!!!!:hug:
WE ARE HERE TO LISTEN

[LinJane]

First, Today I am ok but... First I fund out I have an infection in my arm but they (the nurses) won't say anything else. I have to go back tomorrow. They had left a message on my cell phone because I was supposed to go this morning and I had forgotten. I wonder why??? I go in tomorrow. As I am sure you all know, nurses usually don't tell you stuff, you have to wait for the doctors. It, my elbow, feels alittle better but still swollen. I am being a good girl and taking the antibiotics.

I am so tired that when my alarm went off this morning, it took 40 minutes to hear it. That has NEVER happend to me. I want to shut myself in a room, comfortable pillows, blankets, pj's and sleep. Just wake up when I am ready.

I don't recall ever being so tired. Hope everyone has a good night. Linda

[LinJane]

Today I found out I have a staph infection in my arm. Have no idea how I got it but am being switched to a different antibiotic. The withrew more fluid today. What fun! Linda

[Jo*mar]

I hope that clears up soon Linda..:grouphug:

[DDayMBB]

Today I found out I have a staph infection in my arm. Have no idea how I got it but am being switched to a different antibiotic. The withrew more fluid today. What fun! Linda

Well, Linda at least if they are changing the antibiotic on the basis of a culture w/ sensitivity you should have that knocked out in no time!!! I mentioned yesterday about really feeling the results of the pump, well.. I do not know if I like it, and last night was the first time in nearly 3 years I was able to sleep over 6 hours and final bit prior to awakening were filled with strange dreams which I can do without... I am starting to feel I made a mistake being talked into getting the pump. I should have waited and just went out to Colorado and let Dr Sanders do his stuff!!! I am glad for Peachmom that she has found a Dr that she has full trust in as well as her PT and wish her well with surgery!!! Please let us know further details as to when you surgery is gong to be!!! By the way who is this PT that you are seeing... is it someone in the Wilkes-Barre area, afilliated with a hospital or independant?

[LinJane]

Mark

I'm glad the pump helps with pain but sorry about the side effects. I have been taking pamelor and I have been having really weird dreams. I understand you are getting some straight sleep, but if you are having crazy dreams, that isn't good.

Actually, my arm is hurting worse right now but I thing the antibiotics need to take effect. The doctor said if this doesn't work I need surgery so everyone keep your fingers, and toes, crossed! Thanks, Linda

[dabbo]

Linda.... I hope the antibiotics knock out that infection!

Mark... I'm sorry the pump is giving you side effects, but I am glad that you're getting some relief from it.

So, I went to the ortho today to go over my MRI of my knee. The doc found a quarter to half-dollar sized cyst in the back of my knee. However, the good news is that the MRI didn't show anything torn. After finding the cyst tho, the doc was kinda surprised that he didn't see anything torn. SO, I had a cortisone shot in the knee today, and hopefully that will calm things down enough and the cyst will go away. If it doesn't, then it looks like surgery. boooo.

everyone - :grouphug: take care...

[LinJane]

Dabbo Sorry about your knee. But at least you found the cyst and can treat it. It's a good thing nothing was torn. Could the cyst be causing the trouble or is it a sprain? Best of luck and hopefully the cortizone will help. Linda

[momzpeachy]

Today I...cried. I got caught crying. I hate that. I try to be so dam strong and tough. My motto is..don't let them catch me in tears. I can beat this...can't let it stress me out...don't get worked up....BUT DAM!

I had so much pain this morning I couldn't breathe. I was so dizzy today I couldn't walk straight. I tried a hot shower, I tried laying down, I tried breathing exercises...you name it I tried it....didn't work. I kept dropping things all day. My hand is so cold and numb with tingling. I have been though a lot in my life...been dealt the bad hand many many times...I somehow got through it. I had many surgeries...got through it...had pain...it went away.....THIS DOESN"T GO AWAY! I can't sleep...can't do anything! I hate it...I hate everything about this awful TOS! it's horrible and it destroys your life. People without pain have no clue how bad this pain is. They just have no clue. It's also very scary not knowing what my future holds. I'm angry! My life will never be the same! I guess all this venting doesn't do anything for me either but I needed to let it out. I'm sorry.

Good night all. Hope some of you are pain free this cold, damp sunday evening.

[LinJane]

Momz This is one place you do not need to apologize for venting or being angry. We all at sometime, or, all the time feel this way. That's why this site is here. I went through so many surgeries, pain, etc., and I thought it would never get better. There is hope and there can be some relief. Have you had surgery recently for TOS?? After my last surgery it took one year before I felt relief. There is nothing wrong with crying. Sometimes it can just be a good release. When my son broke his leg, that night when I drove home from the hospital I was crying so loudly I had to turn up the radio so no one else could hear me. Having him break his leg was 1,000 times worse than I thought I could feel. Pain plainly sucks. Do you go to therapy? or a hot bath. Somethings help me but not others. It's hard to find the right thing. Sometimes just spending the day in bed helps. I hope you can get some relief so you can enjoy the holidays. Please vent anytime and it might make you feel better. Linda

[mtnmom]

Momz - Dont be sorry, its quite alright to be angry and even to cry! I did. Sure you're tough, so am I, but we are also human and it is beyond frustrating to feel that you have no control over your body! You're having surgery this week arent you?

DDay - Would insurance cover your treatment in Colorado?

LinJane - hope the arm is doing better!

[DDayMBB]

MtnMom... have to see what comes about with the bills with the pump... right now they are saying I owe $65,000 along with assorted other doctor bills which come to a total of $10,000 so you can say my insurance company is really messed up!!! Almost time to declare chapter 11!!! I would like to come back out to let Dr Sanders do his stuff, I was impressed by his consult he set me at ease and I have been in contact with him several times, when I am ready he says let him know!

Lin&Dabbo... it is only a start in releaving the pain and between myself and my friends here I do not know if the side effects are truly worth it! I told my wife I am only going up one or 2 mg more and calling it quits and telling the doctors what they want to hear!

PeachMom... Please do feel free to vent we all go through bad times and sounds like you need to ask your doctor for some better pain releif till you under go your procedure!!! I know exactly what you are talking about I live in the same damp, cold area you do and this week is going to be filled with snow, sleet and freezing rain and I can see a lot of time rocking back and forth in my chair walking the hall or curled up in a ball!!! What stinks worse is throw in some RSD the cold causes my skin to feel like it is on fire, but that is another thread....:eek:

Has anybody heard from Barbara, Victoria, DiMarie, Dawn, Laura oh heck the list could go on forever and please free to add to it or answer it if you heard from thes persons be nice to know they are doing OK!!!

Well hope all are warm and pain free... Mark~n~Goober

[LinJane]

Mark I haven't seen any posts from anyone yu mentioned. I just hope all are ok and busy doing other things. I am sorry you are having such a hard time. I reember being in that horrible place and not knowing what to do. I am doing better with that pain just tryng to get through the other with the arm. I feel like such a looser. I don't even tell my friends when they ask how I am. "Oh by the way, I have a staph infection in my arm!!" I have TOS, my son broke his leg, yada, yada, yada". I know you all feel the same way. I want to concentrate on Christmas. I haven't started shopping but I am going to try tomorrow. Alittle spirit is needed for all of us! We have had Mary Poppins on TV and I hope everyone has a good night! Linda

[momzpeachy]

Today I am in so much pain!

I had a meeting at my daughter's school yesterday and it lasted 3 HOURS! I sat thee whole time in this awful chair squirrming in pain. I got home and I had trouble breathing and could barely move. I have to remember NOT TO SIT THAT LONG!

I think I need some meds now...something has to be out there for me...I can't take this anymore!!!

DDayMBB - the PT I went too was in Broomall. He's independent and doesn't take insurance at this time. He's going to be part of a practice again soon. I have to use my out of network coverage. The surgeon I went too sent me too him saying he is the best with TOS and will know how to get you better or refer back for surgery. I was referred for the surgery but I plan on working with him afterwards. He gave me some things to do prior and wants me to email him to keep him updated on how I'm feeling. I trust him ...he is the ONLY one who explained everything in layman's terms and he was totally honest. Not one other Doc or PT or chiro explained ANYTHING to me other than "I have TOS and it's a long road"

I just hope I can get better soon!

Momz

[DDayMBB]

PeachMOM... we do have a highly qualified diagnostic doc for TOS in the Valley he also does follow-up treatment and I would not trust anyone else's word, he was able to Dx me before to many people were able to lead me in the wrong directions... Dr A Togut located on Hanover street in the Old Mercy Medical Arts Bldg in Wilkes-Barre phone# 824-2500.

Lin... best of luck with the x-mas shopping and thanks for the concern, sorry to tell you the TOS is bilateral:D just that it is worse on the left... hell I get by and will I just am at a point with the docs that it is not worth the breath anymore!!!

UNTO ALL HOPE A PAIN FREE NIGHT and a BETTER DAY TOMORROW MARK~n~GOOBER !!!

[dabbo]

Momz- I'm sorry that you had to sit through that meeting! Uncomfortable seats, etc are no fun at all.

Mark - I'm beginning to know what you mean (I think) about the docs not being worth your breath anymore....

I got an "interesting" :confused: call from my PM the other day... the short conversation I had with the nurse left me with ALOT of questions.... I have an appt with him on Monday; my wife and I will see what he thinks is going on, and if he will continue to treat me. Great time of year for this too!
This led me to do some digging thru my medical records from 3 of the different doc's I've seen over the last 18mo. All 3 mention CRPS/RSD. I don't think I realized that before, and it makes me wonder why it has seemingly been dismissed. Just one more thing for me to think about. Argggggggh.

Oh, and my knee is still hurting. Cortisone gave a teeny bit of relief, but if I walk for more than a minute or 2 it kills me. Still can't sleep comfortably.

[Jo*mar]

Oh geez Dabbo...:(:grouphug:
Best of luck with that appt- I hope things can get worked out.
You might need to take the records mentioning RSD/CRPS to the PM dr.

[dabbo]

Oh geez Dabbo...:(:grouphug:
Best of luck with that appt- I hope things can get worked out.
You might need to take the records mentioning RSD/CRPS to the PM dr.

that's the thing Jo.... my PM gets copies of EVERY dr. visit I have, so he theoretically knows about the 3 other doc's mentioning it. On my 1st or 2nd visit, he told me that he didn't think it was CRPS. And then I noticed it on something from a neuro I saw ~2 mo ago.

Anyways.... I hope all are doing well - Linda- I hope your infection clears up quickly!!

[Edelweiss]

wish you a fine end of the week and an nice week-end!

dabbo:
I am sorry to read again and again about these awful experiences with doctors/diagnosis etc - and I know what it is and wish doctors and the system would be more patients-friendly.

To Mark, jo, linda, momz,.....I wish good luck!!!

And to all readers/writers I wish a pain-free/less weekend!
Barbara

[DDayMBB]

Barb... nice to see you stopping by, was worried about you.... Thanx for your wishes:cool:

hope all have a good day;)

[dabbo]

Today I....
tried to take it easy. Couldn't hold my fork to cut my chicken at dinner tonight. embarassing.

Now, the Giants are getting their rears kicked by the Redskins. boooooooooooooo.

Lin- hows' the elbow
Momz and mtnmom - how are you 2 feeling?

[momzpeachy]

Today I am wishing I were somewhere WARM!

Hi Dabbo and everyone - feeling the same I guess. My chest pain has been a little better. I had a really bad flare up last week...it was horrible. I think the damp weather didn't help. I'm still in a lot of pain and so darn dizzy. I haven't been getting much sleep which is frustrating. I'm SO TIRED of this! I

I am such a strong person and can tolerate so much but this is rediculous! This pain just eats at you. It doesn't go away! I can't do much of anything anymore. Just holding a coffee cup is difficult. I was told I need to move my arm byt yet almost everything I do makes it hurt more. I try to do little things to keep me moving but it takes me so much longer to do things. I hate it! I am not in the Holiday spirit this year which stinks! I'm not in the mood for anything.

I'm really nervous about having the surgery and I'm upset about having yet another scar on my body. It just never ends. I hope the surgery brings relief but I will probably never be the same 'ol me again.

Hope you all have a wonderful day.

Momz

[LinJane]

Hey everyone. Dabbo elbow still isn't better. He put me on more antibiotics.

My son is going stir crazy and driving me crazy. He went to the doctor today and the doctor said the bone is starting to heal and the pins look great. That makes it worth all the crap he is giving me. He is just like the plant in Little Shop of Horrors! He yells feed me all day long.

I hope everyone starts feeling better to enjoy the holidays. I'm going to shop online now. Have a great night, Linda

[dabbo]

FEED ME!!!!!!!!


just kidding..... hope he heals quickly Linda.

Doing better today, after a productive doctors appointment.
Everyone take care.... low(er) pain levels for all.....

[tshadow]

Dabbo,

so your primary doc went ok - or good? I was VERY worried, actually. About cutting chicken, remember the one good thing about TOS is that symptoms can come and go - and I hope that one will go for you. I remember one of the very last attorney lunches I had, I kept knocking my water glass and finally did spill it. Also, couldn't cut the meat. I felt bad, but in retrospect, "f&* it", you know? Good 'ol TOS, as I say. You can still kiss your sweet little girl, and that's all that counts in my book. (Not to mean I don't understand your frustration.)

Linda,

you're high on my worry list, I will be glad when I hear that your arm is healed and they've gotten it healed...is it very painful to have it drained like that? I am so sorry...you're very funny about your little guy (big guy) though - FEED ME - it's hilarious, and aren't we glad he's saying "feed me" after being so sick?!!!

Momz, sorry to hear of your heightened pain...I pmd you.

Dday, you're such a good host of this thread. I will always say, this is the best thread ever, thanks for inventing it.

Barb, Jo, you're two sweeties for sure!

My day:

I think because I am one of the few work comp patients, I waited 4 hours literally at a doctor's office before being seen. I still can't believe it. Then, I was hit with that little hammer looking for a reflex, and hit repeatedly, harder and harder 'til she got one. I should have said stop. But I didn't. I don't ever want to be labeled uncooperative, and now, boy, I am paying for it. I also finally (I never do) went to the grocery last night with help, but I was looking at stuff, etc., and half-way through I knew I was in trouble. My MEMORY actually then gives way, and I don't really remember much except that I had to go straight to bed, etc. This is also a some-times symptom - when the pain goes VERY high, my memory gives out. Weird.

I have ALL of the TOSers on my mind today. Just really wishing each person some good Christmas cheer, or Hanukkah cheer, or Buddhist cheer - you get my point I hope.

My daughter is visiting right now, and fiance (yes he's back, but seems quite despondent over my downturn physically, I think it's hard to watch me get worse, have no power to change it, and frankly, do everything alone!) is out taking her shopping for me, for some warm things, I was shocked to see she had thongs on...my exhusband, despite my pleas, has NOT stepped up to the plate in the parenting department, and it literally makes me cry cuz I love her so much and I am too sick to be a good mom, the kind of mom I'd like to be and want to be. So I am thankful that fiance steps up to be a dad for her in this way, now, during the holidays. I am hoping that they see a lot of decorations, lights, and feel a little Christmas cheer together. I surely wish I could be with them, but this is second best!

Hard day.

[tshadow]

Where's Dimarie?

Where's Merja???

I really think that sweet Tonia from Australia may have passed away. I've emailed, sent cards / letters, and from having a lot of correspondence, it stopped completely about a year ago. God, I feel bad and would really like to know as she was (or is) a really wonderful person and very upbeat and kind. Anyone know anything?

[dabbo]

Mark- are you still having those side effects from the pump, or have you just said forget it?

Momz- I was hoping to go to the Carribean soon, but that ain't happenin' for us right now. oh well.

Tam- I think I had a good appointment with the Pain doc (who is pretty much my main doc for this) today. He explained his concerns, I explained what happened, figured out where the errors were made on both sides, and then got on to a "real" office visit. He looked at my knee, did the damned reflex tapping. My right knee, the one i've had problems with, gave a delayed response. He also noticed that my right quads are SIGNIFICANTLY smaller than the left, they are less sensitive to temp changes, and the hair and skin are much different. Arghhhhhhhhhhhh. Thank you for your concern, and you're right- I can come home and give my baby girl a big ol' smooch.

And Tam.... you ARE a good Mom. I know that I've struggled with thinking that I can't possibly be a good dad alot; I realized there are certain things physically I can't do with my daughter, but I CAN love her and teach her unconditionally. I'm glad your fiance is stepping up esp at this time of year.

[Edelweiss]

remember that we had a thread last winter: to imagine how it would be in the carribean sun.....(or wherever at this planet, where it is warm and sunny now!)
Maybe you will start dreaming with me - I am on the beach and listen to the sea....

How good it is to dream and to imagine nice things!!!

Have a good day.
Wintergreetings from Austria
Barbara

[tshadow]

Add a nice, hot hamburger to that daydream...hhhmmmm.

gotta run back to bed, pain is going up, up, up...

wanting to call so many of you, but gotta hide out in pain...

[Jo*mar]

Ahh yes , I'm imagining it now.
The warm sun , a very comfy chaise on a beautiful sandy beach, near the water so the waves can splash on my feet.
A nearby table with a cool refreshment of my choice.
Soft music or just the sound of the waves.


Hmmm I'm so there in my head...:D

[DDayMBB]

Where's Dimarie?

Where's Merja???

I really think that sweet Tonia from Australia may have passed away. I've emailed, sent cards / letters, and from having a lot of correspondence, it stopped completely about a year ago. God, I feel bad and would really like to know as she was (or is) a really wonderful person and very upbeat and kind. Anyone know anything?

Tam.. I finally crossed paths with Di.. and at the moment she just does not feel up to coming round I did tell her everybody was thinking about her and praying for her!

Dabbo... I went up another 3/4 of a grain and told the doc to feel my neck that I am precusor to a flare.. he said he does not feel anythig***this is the same guy who makes fun of me for wearing a glove on my real bad hand** sure eough itis motled and sollen will try and tak api and attav=ch it to the bottom who should know my body but my self??? What do you hav on you knee Bakers cysts???

Barb... yes we did hav some sort of wher would you like to be during this time of year... maye for me the Norman Isles:cool:

Lin... is the any change at least????

MY WC case...I was afraid losing my job and afraid of a major corporation... I did not fill out the correct accidentt scene report detials or did I seek imediate medical attetion... I I had to try and prove myselve there on regardless ... I think they have reaped enough of my suffering if notI say my fighting days are done and over,they are victorious, I need to start working on wounds... like a Ganglion Injection in the momorning before tis flare worsens

[DDayMBB]

Got around to getting a picture of my now swelling arm that the doc just would not listen to me... what a jerk I have to go with becaue of insurance... you have to double clickic on the thombnail at the bottom
sorry I Know I am being a bit flighty just one of those times mes and have not slept in the past hree days....

God Bless one and all and hope all have a pain free day tomorrow

Mark~n~Goober

[dabbo]

Lin- I hope your infection is healing, and that your son is getting better too.
Tam - I hope hope hope your pain comes down. Gentle :hug:

Mark- i'm so sorry to hear about that da*n Doc not listening to you. He ought to know that when your arm swells like that, somethings going on.

Not Baker's cysts on the back of my knee.... not sure what kind of cyst it is, other than painful. Though, it is feeling better than it did about a week ago, which is a nice surprise.

I have to go for a lower back MRI in abotu 6 hours. When I was at my appt on Monday, I told the doc about my knee pain, and he examined it. My right upper leg (quad area) is noticeably smaller than my left, has much less feeling, and the hair growth and skin are different than on my left quad. My doc is wondering if I have some lower back problems to throw into the mix. wheeeeeeeeeeeee.

[dabbo]

Oh, and Barb.... great idea! Somewhere warm and sunny...... relaxing!

[Edelweiss]

only jump in and say hello - I suffer from a very unpleasant caught and feel sick because I didn`t sleep so well.
From the caught, my arm hurts - it is so sensible!!!!
Wish you a good day and I am still daydreaming from a nice destination...
Barbara

[Shelley]

HI All,

Just wanted to jump on and wish everyone a Happy Holiday. We leave early tomorrow am for Michigan and Buffalo and dont come back until New Years Eve.

My access to a computer will be limited so I won't be able to check the board very much and respond.

So I wish you all Happy Holidays and prayers for a better 2008.

:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:

P.S. And I think we have some TOSer birthdays coming up. So Happy Birthday to Peg and Johanna! And anyone else I may have forgotten.

[dabbo]

Nobody has posted on this thread in like 3 days!! I just noticed that Jo is a). A Super-Moderator, and has like 4,600 posts. Thats IMPRESSIVE!

Today I.... had some Christmas with my in-laws, and am going to Mass this evening. Hopefully it will be relaxing. but we will see.

[DDayMBB]

This evening we hosted my in-laws for our annual Xmas get together, I am beat... Still do not know what is going on about seeing my children tommorow and my wife has to work so , will wait till morning to snd alon my Greetings except to Shelly as she is going away merry Xmas Shelly... Until later All God Bless... Mark~n~Goober

[DDayMBB]

MERRY CHRISTMAS !!!!

[CrystalSword]

Are you really from Northeast, PA?? I lived there as a child, on Poplar Street, attended St. Gregory Catholic Elementry. Born and raised for the most part in Erie!

[DDayMBB]

Yes I am... The Wilkes-Barre/Scranton area... Arizona weater sounds so very inticing right now.. I am so excited right now my guys wil be here in minutes... grandma & pop are picking them up.... evev thoughthe are older (14&16) I am sure they are wondering what Cathy and I got them!!!!!

[Jo*mar]

Hey we're getting some snow today!!
If it's gets deep enough to be pretty I'll take some pictures.

We rarely get snow exactly on Christmas:D

[CrystalSword]

Okay, I misunderstood....there is a TOWN in North West PA that is called North East....right up there by Erie.

Lol

[mtnmom]

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night...:hug:

[Edelweiss]

am late with my chrismas-wishes - but I could not write them because of internet problems. Now as the holidays are over, it`s ok.
I hope it was a silent, relaxing and good time for all here.

For the new year I will express already today my wishes:
I wish you all a better health for 2008!!!!

Very nice greetings!
Barbara

[DDayMBB]

TODAY I WISH ONE AND ALL A HAPPY NEW YEAR, WITH THIS WISH I PRAY THAT PAIN LEVELS AMONGST THOSE THAT SUFFER DROP AND BURDENS WITH LEGAL AFFAIRS AND MONETARY TROUBLES BE LIFTED GOD BLESS ALL !!!

Mark~N~Goober

[DDayMBB]

Well I am giving what Curious had to say about being able to post pictues... I am posting what my hand arm looks like in a flair and not...
http://http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj305/DDayMBB/003.jpg

http://http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj305/DDayMBB/011.jpg

http://http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj305/DDayMBB/012.jpg

http://http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj305/DDayMBB/014.jpg

[mtnmom]

Holy cow! I'm shocked! Mark, that looks downright painful...

[DDayMBB]

Thanks for the concern mom...yeah it is I was trying to get a picture up of what my hand arm looks like when it is normal, however things in the house got hectic so will try a little later. I deal with these about every other month other than that my skin on my left arm is sensitive to cold and breezes, can not lift or dangle it down to my side... my right hurts, but not to that extreme... ad I have CRPS/RSD in my right foot wich cause it to swell and burn... however since I had the pain pump put in the one meds they have in it (Clonidine) have helped put a halt to that. Mom I was able to edit my earlier post and I added a picture of my had/arm today... I took all the pictures in the same spot so they will be consistent... should I need to give them to an insurance compamy etc. like I told Dena document eveything it helps I have a on going diary from 4/2/05, unfortuately I lost some files to a comuter crash!!!
MOM... what is going on about your surgey??? I thought it was to be soon, I know you have been in unbearable pain and you have been dealing with med problems, no doubt, you have been under medicated, though I am not a doctor and that is just my opinion!

[momzpeachy]

Hi Mark....sorry to hear you are having trouble also. This cold weather we're having isn't helping any! It's so darn cold out I can't even move! I went outside and I tensed up so bad I about fell over in pain. I'm ready for summer!

I'm the same today as always. Pain, pain and more pain. I take cymbalta at dinner time and it helps til about the afternoon the next day...then it's totally worn off! I've just come to accept the fact that I will have this pain until the surgery and HOPEFULLY it will all end after. If it doesn't...I don't know what I'll do! I'll die of boredom! I at least have a laptop to use so I can get on the computer some. I can't sit for long though . I get up and wander around like a lost puppy. I want to do things but can't. It's so dam FRUSTRATING!

Anyways, surgery is still set for the 14th down in Philly @ Thomas Jefferson Hospital.

Momz

[DDayMBB]

By now it is something that I think I am getting used to... the only thing I was illustrating is what happens when I go into a flair! But this cold surely has a negative effect on us I bet you just can not wait... BBrrrrrrr http://http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj305/DDayMBB/cold.gif (http://[IMG]http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj305/DDayMBB/cold.gif[/IMG)] and our weather is supposed to go down even lower tonight!

[DDayMBB]

My goodness this place is sooooo veeerrrrryyyyyy slllloooowwwww mom and I must be the only people awake around here!!!!
Calling: Tam,Daddo, JO, Barb, Victoria, Dawn, Dena, beth,Lin, Beth, Peg, Gibbrn, Ginnybean, hairdresser,Di Marie, hope, Johanna, Dolfinz, Stardust... and whomever I may have forgot please do forgive my ever loving brain fart...:Sorry:

[Shelley]

Nope I am here lurking and about to watch the WVU Oklahoma game.

Still recovering from my post Thanksgiving Bronchitis which has now turned into ear infection.

Happy New Year and :grouphug: for the room.

[Jo*mar]

none of the pictures came up for me Mark- they are blank??
http://?
I don't know what happened to them.

[DDayMBB]

Shelley... that really doesnt sound like to much fun hope you start feeling better soon!!! And as far as lurkng goes thats fine... I think we all do it from time to time!

Jo.. seriously there were pictures up there for almost aday... I was thrilled to see that it worked, I used the site "photobucket" curiou sent to me and mom can attest that there were pics there and that I was not totally crazy guess can try maybe tomorrow after I get my pump adjusment

MOM... I do not knw just abou where you live but here in the back mountain I have 6 F at 11:30

[olecyn]

Hey TOS buddies!
Just checking in to say HAPPY NEW YEAR since I missed HAPPY HALLOWEENIE, HAPPY TURKEY DAY, and Merry Christmas.

Been having a rotten time with pain the last 3 months
Oct - Ganglion block - no help then a 3 week flare
Nov - sinus infection which turned into pneumonia. NO turkey day for ole cyn. Me and my bed.
Dec - BP block, diagnostic discoveries. Unfortunately, no lasting help. In a flare for the majority of the month. In bed for the last 8 days.

Left to see Dr. Jordan this morning at 6am. Poor hubby. Dr. J perscribed Opana ER. Slept all the way home and ALL the CRPS pain is gone. After all this time.

What have I missed besides everyone?

HAPPY B-DAY, MS JOHANNA ;)
And THANK YOU for your advice with Jordan. THANK GOD I have him after 8 years ;)

[Jo*mar]

Oh gosh Cyn, what a way to spend the holidays...:grouphug:
Great news about the opana er working for you :D

[DDayMBB]

OHHHhhh Cyn... so much trouble that you are having, also amazing what our other halves do putting up with us after years , no doubt there entitlement to heaven is wide open:)

[beth]

Hey gang - Happy 2008! May it be better for all of us than last year, with less pain, less stress and more smiles and laughs!

I have a new psych I like a lot - I think she will actually give me a lot of practical help, rather than just listening - I could stay home and talk to my cat for free if that's all they're gonna do. But my sleep is so messed up I've missed a couple appt's! I had one counselor drop me for missed appts, and I DON'T want that to happen here. She knows about my sleeping problems and suggested I see my DR, ask him whether I need a different sleep med (I tried Amytriptyline early on, it worked but gave me nightmares, now I just have Valium, but take it rarely), a referral to the pain clinic or to a sleep clinic, or if he has other options. Due to the holidays, and the kids home from school, I haven't seen him yet.

Once I get to sleep I sleep pretty well - I sleep 10-12 hours if not disturbed. (This is new since the spinal cord stimulator - prior to that it was 3-5 hours a night, with lots of waking up). But I'm not ready to crash til 3-4 a.m., and if I try to go to bed before then I just toss and turn cause I can't get comfortable. Every time dh moves it bothers me, every noise brings me wide awake. Once in a while I manage to go to bed at a normalish time, think maybe I can turn it around, then I do too much, the pain flares and I spend a day or 2 in bed, and I'm right back where I started. Anyone got any magic tips for FALLING asleep?? Other people in this same boat with me? Feel like this HAS to get figured out!!!

Court news: The first week of February I am to go to court over damages due me as the winning party in my vaccine injury case. Although the Special Master announced his decision in MY favor in July of 2006, the Dept of Health and Human Services and their Justice Dept attorney have stalled and delayed ever since. Our requested settlement figures were to them by late September 2006; we did not see figures from them til December 2007. The Vaccine Injury Compensation Program disallows many things that would be routinely included under work comp or a personal injury case, which means I cannot get ANY compensation for assistance for personal hygiene (hairwashing), laundry, shopping, meal preparation or similar.

Additionally, the way they handle pain and suffering is very different. The cap is 250,000. They award the cap to those with the MOST painful and debilitating conditions who will live with them the LONGEST, i.e, the youngest children, then discount the cap according to age/condition accordingly from that worst scenario. So although I have a horridly painful condition, and will have it the rest of my life, I won't get the cap or anywhere close to it.

They did make an offer but what they suggested for P&S and my future wages, pension and benefits was so low I couldn't decide if I should laugh or be insulted. I did tell my lawyer a VERY firm NO WAY. We have a VERY good case, and the BEST witnesses. Dr Togut is actually coming in person!! :) So they can make a much better offer, or I will be happy to see them in court. :D

So - I'll try to keep you posted. Wish me luck!!

beth

[DDayMBB]

Oh Bet I go beyond on the wishes... right now I am unable to type that much as I am hurting, but will air more thouts later.. till than, my prayers your way :wink:

AND MY BEST TO ALL !!!!:)

[pianoplayer]

Once I get to sleep I sleep pretty well - I sleep 10-12 hours if not disturbed. But I'm not ready to crash til 3-4 a.m., and if I try to go to bed before then I just toss and turn cause I can't get comfortable. Anyone got any magic tips for FALLING asleep?? Other people in this same boat with me? Feel like this HAS to get figured out!!!



Beth, I'm finally getting somewhat of a handle on my sleep problems. I have trouble falling asleep and trouble staying asleep. My doc prescribed Rozerem, which works like melatonin. It takes about four weeks to kick in. For the first four weeks I took Ambien as well, and that was great. I'd like to get the Ambien back for the times when the Rozerem fails me. Usually that happens if I'm up too late.

Because it takes about 45 minutes for the meds to work, I take it, then do my toothbrushing face washing routine, then read in bed until I start to feel tired. I have to gauge it right and turn off the light at that time, because if I wait too long, I have more trouble falling asleep - the arm pain sometimes gets too much.

Good luck!

Sue

[mtnmom]

Today I.... got home from the hospital. Not for myself (for a change), but for my father who had a heart attack. They did a angioplasty and implanted a stent in an artery. His heart attack was from an enlarged heart, due to a genetic abnormality, which caused the artery to narrow which in turn did not allow plaque to flow through. He thankfully is expected to make a good recovery.

He is seventy years old and has been an athlete his whole life and still is. He never smoked, has an amazingly healthy diet (low fat, low salt, no transfats, very low saturated fat) lean proteins, high complex carbs and low refined suger, mostly organtic produce and dairy. He is the guy who weights out his food, counts calories to ensure he is getting enough to sustain his activity level, knows his cholesterol count (including his good cholesterol vs. bad cholesterol ratio) knows his body fat percentage, knows his resting heart rate and max heart rate, knows his lactic acid threshold for excersice... You get the picture... He makes even me look out of shape and lazy! Anyway, there he was laying in ICU looking frail and sick, saying "How can somthing like this, happen to someone like me?" and I could totally relate. You just never know, you live your life the best way you know how, take care of yourself and you can still end up in the hospital.

Again, he is expected to be fine and was even given the okay to ski race in Febuary! If he wasnt so healthy, this condition could have done him in years ago. My sister and I have been told to have tests done to see if we have inhareted this enlarged heart problem as well, then we have to have our children checked too.

[DDayMBB]

Beth... You are one of the few people here that come out and say they seek counseling, I myself have to admit it does help meeting with somebody I have gone through several people till I found the person who was right for me . I really do feel sorry for you going into your hearing knowing the exact cause and having your hands tied, though having Dr. T there may be something "MAJOR" on your side and help in getting a better settlement!

Sue... sounds like you have the sleep problem under control and have your body clock down!!! Is there any foods or beverages that you avoid in the evening and activities that you avoid???

MtnMom... Mom please do take heed and warning by happenig with your dad and do get checked out and do so soon, you do not need any other problems to arise!!!

a pic of my puppy playing catch http://http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj305/DDayMBB/008.jpg]

Thoughts and prayers to all those with chronic pain.... Mark~n~Goober

[LinJane]

MarkLove the picture of your dog. I have one of my golden in the middle of a blizzard. If I can figure out how to put it on I'll send it. I'm having problems with my computer and using my son's. Hope you had a nice Christmas with your kids. We had a nice relaxing one.

As far as counseling goes, I have been to a few. I agree that not everyone wants to announce they are seeing someone, it can help alot. I haven't been in about 1 year but the counselor I saw was helpful. Everyone has an issue or two. Sometimes a friend or family member can help but, sometimes you need an outside party to help. You need to speak out without hurting someones feelingsto know how to deal with things. Having TOS or another chronic illness makes us vulneralbe to different life issues. Not everyone can understand.

Now let's get allitle lighter. TODAY I --- went to my daughter's swim meet. She came in second in the 100 free style in the Counties. My younger son wrestled but lost his two matches. Still, he did a great job.

Hope everyone enjoys their weekend! Linda

[dabbo]

I hope everyone has a good weekend and has been having a good 2008 so far!
I've been lurking alot more lately.... STILL trying to find work, and that is bugging the crap out of me now. The typing less is good, but the making no money isn't good. Arggggggggggh.
Now, I've got the cold that everyone has, so i've been sneezing. that hurts like, well, y'all know. I have that shooting pain (one continuous wire-like) from my neck/head to my fingers, tired of that quickly. sorry for rambling. It COULD be worse. At least there's ALOT of football on lately :-) .

I hope all are well
:hug:
dabbo

[Shelley]

Ugh Dabbo - I have had that variation of a cold since the week after Thanksgiving. First a cold, then bronchitis and then fluid on my ears. All the holiday flying did not help.

So take it easy and watch football all day! Oh and Alffe gave me a great tip. Get Vicks vaporub and instead of putting on chest, put on soles of feet. It worked with my coughing...seriously google it. Although do it only at night. I did it during the day and put shoes on and my feet burned....hahahahahahah

Oh Mtmmom - :hug: so sorry ot hear about your father. He is in my prayers although it sounds like they caught it in time if he can ski race in feb. :eek: God Bless him and your whole family.

Mark great pic! :hug:

Beth - keeping my fingers corssed for your case...well crossed as best I can that is :D

Cyn - you sure have been through a lot in the last couple of months. :hug::hug: but I am glad you now have the incredible Dr J!

:grouphug: for the room.

[momzpeachy]

Today...I am hoping for a miracle...that I don't get SICK!

Everyone in my house is sick with colds. My husband was sneezing and looking sick yesterday but he insisted he wasn't sick! Today...he has informed me that he has a cold...he is sick! UGH! He kissed me last night! ACK!

How do I keep from getting a cold prior to surgery! I can't have the surgery if I'm sick and the surgeon is booked until March! I'm gonna OD on Vitamin C and Airbourne..

Momz

[pianoplayer]

MtnMom - sorry to hear about your dad, but happy things seem to be under control!

Mark - Are you sure that's your back yard? Looks like mine, although the snow melted today. I'm a major caffeine freak and a smoker, and I don't cut back on any of it at night.

Sue

[tshadow]

Our house is sick...

Lots of stomach - uh - you get the picture...

Humans and dogs...although not related I am sure, just get tired of stripping the bed and having to change or find clean sheets!

Tough time.

Hello to all.

[tshadow]

Most of my counseling (in year 3) (over the phone) was spent arranging a NEW time to call because my pain was too high to handle the talking for this call...

Ironic.

[DDayMBB]

Sue..Yep,yep... its my back yard, been back ot there a few times since its mine and we have had wierd weather and the snow has melted pretty much so here also!!!:D

Tam... maybe I had addressed the counseling thing the wrong way, just that it is under mentined and maybe it should be more often... we all could use extra help with all the stressors placed on us!!! God knows I am thankful for Prozac and the ocasional Valium or 2 ! Sorry to hear about all of the sickness in the household and nothing personal, but you may keep that out on the west coast and hope you guys start feeling better!!!:hug:

MOM... sounds like the quarantine unit for you besides mega zinc OJ Bananas etc... makes me glad I took my GPs advice when I was in his office and he offered up flu, pnuemonia and influnenza and I jumped on board quick. I will keep my finger crossed for you that you stay well....:Good-Luck:

Lin... I do not know how you can keep up, having one teen, semi bed bound, another child on the matts than elsewhere you have a water logged child!!! :OuttaHere:

Dabbo... I hope & pray, that with the start of the New Year that your new employement comes about for you, in the exact field that you seek!!!:Tip-Hat:

Shelley... That sounds very P A I N F U L sure as day gets long the foot gets a bit shorter and hotter:Bang-Head:!!!!

Nakita **would like to say**(our little puppy dog all 170 lbs. she lost weight)... thanks to everybody for their great comments

UNTO ALL HAVE A GREAT NIGHT MARK n GOOBER

[tshadow]

Mark,

My dogs and I are on our way on a Red-eye flight, coming to lick your door handles and all of your forks and cups, just in case...



:eek:

We are the BBs - (barf brigade)

Everyone is getting well rather slowly.

God bless everyone this New Year!!!

[momzpeachy]

Today I am wondering why I had kids. I know this sounds harsh but man I'm so tired and stressed. I love my kids but I just don't know how much more I can handle.

I have a daughter who has multiple disabilities and in 10th grade. For the last 2 years, she has done anything and everything WRONG! She is trying to fit in wherever she can. Of course it's with all the "misfits". She has pierced herself, done drugs, smoked, lie, lie and lie, stolen stuff from stores...it just goes on and on. I have done everything to get her help. My husband and I have been fighting the school for years to get her support in school. We finally got some and she won't use it. She has been telling us she has (like tutoring after school) but instead she's out in a field smoking who know's what. SHe purposely doesn't take the bus home so she can stay after and smoke and then tells me she missed the bus! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

Yesterday I dumped out her purse and found a pack of cigarettes ...oh yea..she's 15 and has a heart condition! I got a whole pile of stuff she stole from local stores and from the mall when we went after Christmas!

Last night I cried and cried...and drank a lot of wine. Raising kids is NOT EASY! I just see so many bad things in this world ...it keeps getting worse. Kids today are not the same as when I was a kid. THings have really changed and it's sad.

I am trying to cool off and get my voice back now...I'm sorry but I just needed to vent and not with my voice..lol..

Happy Wednesday....

Momz

[johannakat]

Having an ADD 10th grader myself i totally sympathize.

wine can be a really good thing sometimes jsut don't try to talk to her while you are at it :p

You just have to stay strong and calm and let her know that this will not be tolerated. I have mentioned on this board before that in my house when you get in trouble you don't just get grounded...you get WORK. cleaning bathrooms, floors, doing dishes, folding laundry, whatever needs doing. My theory is that if I have to take extra time to do something for you, you can return the favor....you could certainly use the help to offset the stress and pain you experience without all these new troubles she is creating.

It may not work, and many many times I have spent a lot more energy supervising these extra types of chores than it would take me to do them myself....but the message gets through.

Or, Maybe you need to have her return all the things she stole and take the legal punishment for them...that can be a wake up call when an officer shows up to take her fingerprints and such..

I also know what you mean about the assistance at school. My daughter was eligible for all sorts of things through her 504 plan, but she never uses any of it. If you can, stipulate in the IEP or 504 that one of the accomodations she needs is HELP and DIRECTION using the provided assistance.

In the end, the best you can do is try to stay in close touch with your daughter and supervise her as much as you can. It won't always work, but you can't blame yourself if you are doing your best. At some point she has to take responsibility for herself.

Does she see a therapist at all? That is another thing that really helps my daughter. Nothing like an adult who is not your parent who can be used to bounce things off of. My daughter loves her therapist...and truth be told I thin she is a little soft, but that apporach works for my kiddo, and slowly (over 3 years now) she is really coming to understand some things that i thought she might never get.

ack, well, take it easy and try try not to cause yourself extra pain from being upset- teenagers are a ******, btu they get better...I know this because i was a total hellion to my parents when i was a teen, but even I turned out OK :D or so they tell me.



:hug:

[LinJane]

Momz I am sorry you are having so much trouble with your daughter. Being the mother of a teenager is very difficult. I am lucky but my husbands two nieces have been in trouble since they were 12-13. Trouble with drugs, heroin and ectasy the main choice. Stealing from relatives, 1 has 2 children by different men. 1 she met in rehab. both have been in jail for drugs and burglary. Very disappointing. We did not go to Christmas dinner at my mother-in-laws this year because they were there. My children are disgusted by them. The only good thing about this is the affect on my kids is so disgusted that they won't be with them. Sorry Momz, I don't know what to tell you. Professional help is probably the way to go but it sounds like you have tried that. At 15 they think they are invincible. I hope you can find someone to help her before she gets hurt.

Linda

[Jo*mar]

Momz,
Have you looked at Online schooling?
You would have to be around to oversee that she does the work and hrs required.
It would get her away from the bad influences until she has matured a bit more and able to make better decisions.

My daughter was getting behind in credits in the public school - she got distracted easily, didn't really connect with any of the teachers, didn't apply herself & was shy about asking for help.
The online school we decided to try seems to be working great for her. She can get instant feedback on how she did on her assignments.
If you want to look into it here's the site to the one we use http://www.connectionsacademy.com/

[dabbo]

Momz- I'm so sorry to read about the troubles you're having. I hope that someone reaches her, and helps her see what is going on.

So... today is my 3mo 25 day of unemployment. and my best lead for a job.... ::Drumroll:: insurance agent. Leap of faith to go full commish without benefits. :eek: Thats what i'm struggling with right now. Dropping resumes with everyone who might know someone.

take care all.....

[momzpeachy]

Today I am trying to recover from one heck of a day yesterday.

Everything went from bad to worse! My daughter is a mess and she doesn't see it. Everyone else does. She has Mild Cerebral Palsy, learnign disabilities, serious heart condition, only one functioning kidney, several other birth defects and ASperger's syndrome. She has never been able to accept any of it. She hates herself and she keeps trying to be someone else. I can't even begin to describe what we have been going through.

We have been seeing problems for years...seeing them escalate. We have been seeking out help from school, mental health...you name it...we can't get it. She puts on this pretty face and tells everyone that everything is fine. She has been lying to everyone and we saw the problems. She has cut herself, pierced herself, used drugs, now other self mutilation has occurred. She has been trying to stretch her earlobes along with other things. She's 15! It's horrible!

She has now made friends with 2 boys who have an extensive arrest record and has done jail time. The crazy thing is...the one boy beat up her brother and was arrested and banned from the block! But now she's decided to "hang out" with him. I can't honestly understand any of this. She has made accusations now that have gotten other people in trouble. She thinks by lying about things..she will look like the good guy and she will get her way and her freedom.

I've totally lost my mind at this point. My ex husband took her last night and now we are dealing with the...what's next. The mental health system sucks and is not quick on anything. I don't know what will happen now. She cannot return to the same school..EVER!

This is not what I needed....I have been fighting for this girl since day one and she has no respect for me or for anyone. I can't keep fighting anymore. I have nothing left in me. I'm an emotional wreck and can't take anymore. It just never ends!

Momz

[KLS2007]

Momz, I'm so sorry to hear that you're having to go through all this on top of having TOS, that's definitely a lot to deal with! I wish I had some good advice to offer you but unfortunately I don't. I went through a lot of trouble with my son when he was a teenager....drugs, suspension from school, legal trouble....he ended up in jail soon after he turned 18 and spent several years there. He's been out for several years now and will be graduating from college in May...with a 4.0 GPA & is doing great!!! There's still hope for your daughter, maybe with time things will get better! Just keep on being a tough parent, that's the best thing you can do for her. I never thought I'd see the day but my son actually said that "tough love" was the best thing for him.

[Jo*mar]

Has she been seen/evaluated by a psychiatrist?
vs therapists or counselors?
Hypnosis?

poor kid - poor mommy & daddy:grouphug:

[Edelweiss]

want to explain why I didn`t express my new year`s wishes earlier: we had a total internet-line problem. first it was the net and then the telephone.
but now I am online again and of course I want to wish you all a good 2008 with lot of joy and health.

during the holidays I had a laryngo-trachneo-bronchitis what a fine thing! it burned like fire and now I still have to take some meds.

thank you for the birthday wishes, I didn`t celebrate it so much - after new year no one is interessted in a birthday party and so I transfered it to april. a friend of mine who has her birthday just before christmas and I will give a party together. some will find this bizzare to transfer the birthday but it`s more relaxed.

my next shoulder surgery will be on februray 26th - and I am so afraid of it. I hope it will be fixed this time.

I read all your communications in this thread and I am sorry for the troubles some of you had recently.

I wish all the best to all readers and writers!!!
Barbara

[LinJane]

Barbara That is a great idea to move your birthday celebration. Christmas is always a hectic time in my family. My sister's birthday is Christmas Eve and my father's is the day after. Mine is 1/3 and no one wants to do anything by then. I got a happy birthday from my family but that was it. I don't really care it just is kind of nice to not have to cook or even a card. Whatever. This has been a bad year for our company. The weather is not cooperating so business is slow which means low on cash. when things pick up I'm sure we'll go out to dinner or do something. Linda

[trixlynn]

My son is borfn on the 29th of Dec., so we celebrate his "un"birthday on June 29 instead.

[johannakat]

Momz- My daughter was cutting herself at the peak of her frustration. she hit a major wall in 7th grade. It was a very difficult time for us. What about a full psychoeducational work-up, i assume you have had one of those? And she should clearly have an IEP at whatever school she is attending. If you find a supportive therapist/psychologist they can attend those IEP plannign meetings with you and help make smart goals and accomodations to help your daughter.

have you ever visited this internet site? It is a great resource for dealing with schools.

http://www.wrightslaw.com/

It sounds like you aren't really this far yet, and you'll need to do some hard thinking to figure out what the next step is, but bookmark it so that you can look through when the time comes.

Will your ex be firm with her and give her good supervision? Even if not, a change of scenery might be good for her. Can she stay there for a while, like until you get through your surgery? Even if not, or if the supervision isn't quite what you would prefer...maybe it is a good thing. I think often we fight and fight and fight for our kids, but they have so much that needs to be worked out on their own. It is a horrible struggle on the part of the parents to decide when is the right time to let them fail...especially when the stakes are high. Like I mentioned...a good reality check like getting caught by the authorities doing something illegal and booked for it can be a great learning experience. Having to spend a night in a holding cell 'cause mom isn't available to bail you out....might make her think twice the next time.

I had a friend who had to put her oldest daughter in a custodial rehab school, and it was a very tough decision for the whole family. She was gone for about two years. Her sisters missed her, mom and dad missed her, and for the first few months they didn't even get to talk to eachother. It was 6 months before they could visit. The cost was about like two years of college. However, it was worth it. The daughter is home now attending community college as a changed person. The family is happy, would do the same thing again in a heartbeat, I think.

As a smaller measure in teh same direction, maybe you could send her off to one of those outdoor programs for at risk teens for the summer. Nothing like a little hard work surviving in the woods to put the rest of your life in perspective.

Besides getting your daughter in therapy, get yourself some, OK? This is an incredible hardship to deal with. It will tax your mental capacities to the limits without the complications of TOS. With it, yes, your mind probably feels like it is going to explode into about 3 million pieces off into the univers (and sometimes you wish it would and that the pieces would not come back!!!) Finding someone who can help you work through the options, see what is your emotion and what is real, identify your needs and your daughters needs...these are really important things that we can't always do alone.

:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:


wishing the best for you...Johanna

[pianoplayer]

I'm so sorry to read about your struggles with your daughter. Just remember that you're not alone. My son has given us grief since 7th grade. He was a cutter for about a year, he was suicidal, depressed... Was arrested for smoking pot and for trespassing... He's 19 now and still on his own roller coaster, but he may be finally going towards the light. He's in counseling for drug addiction (marijuana).

His dad (my ex) and I saw a counselor last week who said just keep the pressure on with the rules and punishments. (I've gotten really close to just kicking him out of the house.) She said she doesn't believe kids should be kicked out unless they become a danger to others in the home - either psychologically or economically (stealing from family members).

:hug:

[DDayMBB]

TODAY I SAY>>>GOPACKERS

[tshadow]

Today I've hit my movement limit, can no longer use arms / legs again for today. So, off to bed. Pain is sky high also.

I will read and hopefully respond to others' posts soon, I miss you all and pray for you.

For all of those with child problems right now, I had two teens who were very adversely affected by my illness...it took a huge toll on their lives. Try to keep the family together, with love, and understanding of how scary it is to have a parent so ill. Some react by withdrawing, others anger, others drugs or love interests, and more...they are all reacting, so try to talk it out.

[tshadow]

Also, about the kids, if you are single parent, imagine how frightening it is for the kids to wonder who will take care of them if we are totally disabled - as I am now?

[mtnmom]

Today I.... am frustrated. As you know I live here in the mountains of colorado. I love it and everyday I am thankful to live in such an amazingly beautiful place, which allows me to do all the sports that I love. However, as you can imagine, it gets pretty cold up here sometimes at nearly 10,000 feet in elevation. Never used to bother me much, just bundled up and dealt with it. Gotta take the good with the bad, right?

I have been snowboarding quite a bit and really enjoying it this winter, dont have to use my bumm arm and shoulder too much! Anyway, due to the lingering vascular issues I have, thanks to TOS, my right hand gets cold beyond belief. I mean really cold... I will be sitting on the chair lift and it gets cold, then it gets tingly, then goes numb, then throbs. Some of the worst pain I have ever felt. I was actually wimpering on the lift yesterday with my husband!

So, I had bought new expensive water proof and insulated snowboard gloves with fleece liners and I wear wool liners under that. Still, didnt help! Now i have to come up with a 'plan B".

This TOS thing really is p***ing me off! Like I have time for this!?! Geezzz...

[mtnmom]

Oh and Tshadow... I hope you are feeling better today!

And you're right - Its gotta be tough for kids to watch their parents be sick and suffer. It was tough for me to see my dad sick, when he had the heart attack just recently, and Im am 36 years old and a parent myself!

[tshadow]

Also, to all parents, be very wary of the computer. Myspace is a menace. Two years ago I wrote Dr. Phil to try to warn parents. In one hour, kids can post the ugliest stuff about a child, and the entire school will know it, and will bully the kid the next day. Then, the "bad" kids erase their posts, and there's no proof of it. So bullying has reached a level that we never had to deal with. If and when you see your kid really depressed, it can often be something that is going on with the other kids that your child is not telling you. Bullying, gangs, school violence, it's a lot different and really scary, than when I was a kid, and even then, in the late 70's I went to a really violent school (we moved a lot in CA) and I can remember being scared to death every day of school.

I fully believe in counseling for the child to have, as Johanna says, another adult to confide in, talk to, etc. I have spent probably $20K on both kids in counseling fees...so much cash...but it wasn't covered by insurance, and I hope it helped them as they grew up into adults. I was divorced, so I felt the kids needed more than just me to turn to for advice and support. I happened to choose female counselors, and always waited by the door during counseling. I also say there is no reason to ever leave your child alone with an adult, subject to molestation. If you have a piano lesson, sit there and listen. If you have a counseling session, sit by the door and listen, if you have to go to the store, you take your kids with you...I don't think there is ever a time that my children were vulnerable for molestation, and thankfully, it never happened to them.

This is all off-topic of TOS, but also the TOS scared the heck out of my little one, and made my older one so angry, and both had problems dealing with it.

Heck, I still have problems dealing with my own TOS and loss of my life! I am scared sometimes by the level of pain, and then wondering HOW am I going to die - will I be a vegetable, will a doctor ever cut off the little help I do get from the meds, will I be cut off of Social Security or face homelessness when I can't even use my arm most days? So to imagine then how this affects the children is not too hard...they went from having "supermom", a hardworking, very safe mother, to having a mom who can't take care of herself at all, and a very dim and frightening financial future. I lost my beautiful home by the beach, which was their "home - home", even though they had grown up and moved on to their own places.

I have nothing but compassion for parents these days, but also high expectations of what it takes to be a good parent.

[dabbo]

You're right Tam... It seems to me that MySpace's reputation is worse than Facebook. It amazes me how quickly things can spread thru those sites though. They kinda scare ME and i'm not a kid. I guess future employers have been looking at those sites when recruiting. Unreal.
This week I've been in insurance prelicensing class. 9hrs a day. I am wiped out, haven't been sleeping well, and have had to take alot of notes - I'm left handed, so writing is esp. hard. Oh well. i take my test on friday, so hopefully I pass....

Mark - GO G-MEN!!!!! :)

I hope all are well,,,
Also, to all parents, be very wary of the computer. Myspace is a menace. Two years ago I wrote Dr. Phil to try to warn parents. In one hour, kids can post the ugliest stuff about a child, and the entire school will know it, and will bully the kid the next day. Then, the "bad" kids erase their posts, and there's no proof of it. So bullying has reached a level that we never had to deal with. If and when you see your kid really depressed, it can often be something that is going on with the other kids that your child is not telling you. Bullying, gangs, school violence, it's a lot different and really scary, than when I was a kid, and even then, in the late 70's I went to a really violent school (we moved a lot in CA) and I can remember being scared to death every day of school.

I fully believe in counseling for the child to have, as Johanna says, another adult to confide in, talk to, etc. I have spent probably $20K on both kids in counseling fees...so much cash...but it wasn't covered by insurance, and I hope it helped them as they grew up into adults. I was divorced, so I felt the kids needed more than just me to turn to for advice and support. I happened to choose female counselors, and always waited by the door during counseling. I also say there is no reason to ever leave your child alone with an adult, subject to molestation. If you have a piano lesson, sit there and listen. If you have a counseling session, sit by the door and listen, if you have to go to the store, you take your kids with you...I don't think there is ever a time that my children were vulnerable for molestation, and thankfully, it never happened to them.

This is all off-topic of TOS, but also the TOS scared the heck out of my little one, and made my older one so angry, and both had problems dealing with it.

Heck, I still have problems dealing with my own TOS and loss of my life! I am scared sometimes by the level of pain, and then wondering HOW am I going to die - will I be a vegetable, will a doctor ever cut off the little help I do get from the meds, will I be cut off of Social Security or face homelessness when I can't even use my arm most days? So to imagine then how this affects the children is not too hard...they went from having "supermom", a hardworking, very safe mother, to having a mom who can't take care of herself at all, and a very dim and frightening financial future. I lost my beautiful home by the beach, which was their "home - home", even though they had grown up and moved on to their own places.

I have nothing but compassion for parents these days, but also high expectations of what it takes to be a good parent.

[DDayMBB]

Just a quick How Green Bay All the way home field tempd going with Farvre and the Pack I suck with the ups and downs thinking about momz and her surgery to Tam hope all went well with the new doc and Barb sure nic sure nice seeing U around sorry to leave anyone out though ready for bed time... besides had a pump increase today hope all understand ...Mark~n~Goober

[Edelweiss]

don`t have much work - and so it is easy for me to come here and say hello to you all.
Yesterday we had a "formation" day about communication and perception.
This gaves me so much - in a nice atmospheres with working mates from other offices in the region we were working in small groups and we laughed a lot. Human communication has so many faces and sometimes this is funny - sometimes it is very difficult.

I hope that we all here can find happy moments and for a short time the problems are in the background. And this is a good feeling.

I wish you all a problemfree day - no matter if they are family/children/working/health, or whatever problems...

All the best and take care!
Barbara

[LinJane]

Barbara You sound very happy and upbeat. I hope this continues. When we are happy with work and home, it takes the stress off which helps with pain.

I found out today that on Tuesday my son's pins come out. HORRAY! They believe that within a month he can do some light jogging. He has been doing well with his home instruction. We have very interesting instructors. One man is probably in his 80's. He is really nice and relates real life events with what he is teaching. I like to eavesdrop to hear his stories. It makes it interesting for David.

We are going to Disney the end of February. We have had it planned for awhile now but were unsure if we could go. Now that we are, the kids are planning all they want to do. It really is a magical place.

I hope all are well.

Mark What's the deal with the Giants and Packers? I hear it is going to be very cold on Sunday. My husband and son were bummed when Dallas lost. Needless to say we received many phone calls heckling them.

Oh Well! Linda

[dabbo]

Today I (well, Thursday,)... finished up the required class for insurance sales. I take my test today (Friday) at 8 am for my Life and Accident, Health, and AD&D Insurance sales licenses. I studied alot tonight, so I hope I pass. I'm glad the note taking is over- I could hardly write anything out today.

Mark- I hope that the pump increase helps
Barb- Its great to hear from you- you sound so upbeat! "People watching" is lots of fun I think.

[pianoplayer]

I haven't been on this board for long, but have quickly come to admire you for all the help you give your fellow TOSers. I am so sorry for what you have to go through and I want you to know that your words have touched my life.

Sue

[tshadow]

Wow, seeing this post makes me wonder if I should laugh, or cry, or cut it out and dip it in gold (or in my mom's case chocolate) to send to my mother who's favorite thing to do is call me and criticize me up one way and down the other!!! Hahaha.

Truth is, that I DO care.

The problem was I was getting so sick I couldn't even post or talk to you guys on the phone. But the new pain mgt. doc raised the new Methadone, and get this, I was able to get into the pool today, and talk to neighbors, and although yes I had pain at about a 6, it wasn't my usual 9 which was scaring me to death.

And with adequte pain help, my arms moved, my legs moved, etc.

Now (at 3 AM I am having pain, maybe from having moved those legs muscles in ways I hadn't for many months!)

Pianoplayer Sue, I get the feeling that you are younger than me, and I used to LOVE to play big grand pianos to get out my feelings, and just to hear the beauty of the instrument. I don't think I could play - ever - now. So my hope for you is that you are able to find a way around TOS, or with TOS, and good pain management care, to always be able to play your instrument. Maybe not use your hands for other, unimportant things, but save them and use them for the piano.

I will go now and real all of your posts so I can get to know YOU better.

God bless you and thank you for my most favorite compliment!!!

I just LOVE the people here!

[tshadow]

Dear sweet people:

Mark - I would imagine that with a pump increase that at first sleep a lot. But then you get your bearings, so to speak, and actually may have some good days cuz you are getting adequate pain coverage??? This day of extra Methadone literally changed my skies from gray to blue, from isolation, to all of my neighbors saying "hi." I felt like I was in a Disney movie today!

Barb - I have to admit a little jealousy, my friend. I do miss my career, my identity, amongst other like minded, like - intelligence (ha) people. At the time, it felt like competition...but now, I see that much of it was affection. Your corporate exercises sounded like great fun to me. I wish you GREAT successes this year 2008.

Dabbo - the insurance whirl is starting. New campaigns - and I do mean campaigns in the war-like sense...and then the looming deadlines where you just want to get in one or two more signed deals to make the big commish...Yes, you've got some good fun coming. Get a team going, even if it's just you and your wife, (which I've seen take down entire regions! A husband and wife team can be mighty.) Or, take it easy at first, watch, absorb, and wait until you feel you are ready to jump and start in on the race. Either way, we're here to hear what's up. When you have time, that is. GREAT JOB opening new doors, my friend.

MTn Mom - every time you post I swear I smell those vanilla pines like they have in Mammoth...and a little fogged breath comes out...I picture you in pristine God's country...beautiful in any way you turn...I wish you continued good health, along with your TOS, if there were a way to separate them, and steal, take, demand those moments when you are in charge, sliding down those mountains. Gosh, I love where you live. And you're right next to Denver, if you need those TOS docs, don't forget...

Pianoplayer - I posted a big concern for you on your other thread. Just some brainstorming for disability issues. God bless you today, and hope you can play well today.

God bless all of the other TOSers, here and abroad, and put angels around us, and protect us from any further harm. We've really had all we can take, I think, if I may speak for us all. We need other people's compassion, wisdom and our own courage. Thanks.

.I forgot Linjane - GOOOO our son! Nails out. Kid off and running again! OOOhwheee!

And so many others!

[dabbo]

Pianoplayer- I couldn't have put that any better. Thank you for posting that!

Tam- You're great ;)

Lin- I hope that your son 's recovery continues to go well. I'm sure he's ready to get active again!

Shelley - will you PLEASE :Poke: give me my :icecream: back ;)

so...I passed my Life test and Accident and Health tests yesterday. I was totally wiped out afterwards. Look out, here I come! Is this ironic that I (who probably can't get an individual health policy) will be selling insurance?

Anywho.... take care!

[LinJane]

Dabbo Congratulations on your test!!! That is very exciting. I am so happy for you. Starting a new career is challenging but will be alot of fun. I wish you great success!!

Tam You sound like you are doing so much better. It wasn't that long ago that you were so sick and not getting out of bed. I hope this continues and gets better each day!

I found out yesterday that my sons pins can't come out until the 28th. Only one more week but it was a big let down for him. Insurance would not pay for the procedure being done in the surgical center it was scheduled for. It has to be done in the hospital and the doctor can't do it until then. Only another week but very disappointing. It has been 2 months with this thing on his leg. Difficult for him to sleep, shower, etc.

Mark Hope the pump is working for you. I'm sure it is difficult to adjust to . Feel better.

Hope everyone has a good day! Linda

[Edelweiss]

can tell you that the week started with chaos and troubles.
In fact, I am alone at the office and there is so much to do.
In the meantime, I take it with humour, but in the morning, I missed the working-mate who was planned to open the office - she was sick but didn`t call or write a sms - others are on holidays or are having their day off,.... so doing the work for several people is not funny.
But now in the afternoon, it is quiet here and I can enjoy the silence and don`t have to talk to someone. Great.

@Lin
I am surprised to read that your son has already his pins for 2 month. For someone outside it seems time passes by quickly, but I think for you all it was loooooooooooooooooooooooong!!
I keep my fingers crossed for the 28th!!!

To dabbo, tamara, piano, Mark,....... I wish a good beginning of a new week with power and energy!

ALL THE BEST!!!
Barbara

[LinJane]

Barbara I was just wondering what your profession. As we all know, working can be very difficult with TOS. I am lucky that we own our own business and I can pretty much make my own hours. Some weeks I'll be in 3 days or none at all. But, being the owner gives you EXTREME STRESS!!!!

Mark Sorry to watch your Packer's lose but I say GO GIANTS!

Hope everyone has a great day.

Linda:grouphug:

[mtnmom]

Tshadow - Indeed I am lucky to live in such a place... And only an hour away from Denver, with all the TOS Dr.'s, just in case! Thank you for your thoughts! I am determined to not let this nasty TOS thing get me down, now or ever. Granted, my symptoms are not nearly as bad as some of you here, with the exception of little aches and pains and a cold hand - Im pretty much good to go!

Mark - My chin still hurts from when it hit the ground when Farve threw that interception. :eek: Bummer... He isnt getting any younger and it would have been nice to see him go to the Super Bowl this year.

[marabunta]

Today I...am ready for a nap!

Just back from PT...I'm now 6 weeks past left-side full scalenectomy with no rib resection. I've been staying away from typing and doing it right handed only when necessary.

It was a mess in there, C5 & C6 were fully within the substance of the anterior scalene muscle, and the long thoracic nerve was within the substance of the middle scalene. So that 90 minute surgery turned into 5 hours.

The 1st 2-3 weeks were a breeze compared to the last 4. Those nerves "waking up" have been a killer.

[LinJane]

marabunta Hope each day gets better for you. The surgery is not an easy one. Hopefully your recovery will be quick. Linda

[Shelley]

Hmmmm TOS acting up this week....has to be new office with new desk. Still waiting for ergo keyboard tray. So best to kay off the typing.

Just wanted to sy hi everyone.

[dabbo]

Hi all....
Mara- I'm glad that your recovery is going well, but i'm sorry that its been a pain lately.
Shelley - I hope they get you that ergo keyboard pronto.
I got a Bluetooth keyboard and mouse for our PC, and I've found that helps. Without the wires, I can position them however is most comfortable. I think I paid like $50 on eBay total.
LETS GO G-MEN!!

I'm in "sales class" for a couple of days this week and its draining. I think this would be an interesting job, but I do hope that something comes along in Fixed Income. What I should really do is pray more, for the RIGHT job to come along.

[Shelley]

Hey Dabbo...Go PATS!!!!:mf_swordfight:

[dabbo]

Boooo smelley Shelley :eek:
no :icecream: for you.
:Poke: no more picking on the Giants fans else we'll have to get a mod in here :D

[DDayMBB]

OMG TAM IS ALL I AN CAN SAY... YOU NEED TO TAKE TO ME TALK TO ME ASAP I GAVE STEVE MY NUMBER... I THOUGHT YOU HAD IT , BUT I USUALLY CALLED I MOST OF THE THE TIME HOW IN THE HELL DID I MISS THE ABOVE WHAT YOU WROTE AND PLEASE IF YOU WANT SPANK ME FOR THE BAD WORD SORRY TO THOSE THAT MAY TAKE OFFESE TO IT !
LIST CONVERATION SEEEE YOUR pprivat message

[Jo*mar]

whew, catching up here and saying a quick Hi!
we've been getting bunches of new members lately so trying to get to know them and all that stuff - haven't had much time to reading or posting here.
:grouphug:

[momzpeachy]

Today I... am very very tired.

Yesterday was a rough day everything hurt. By last night I was in tears. Yesterday afternoon I started to get frustrated because I just felt like I couldn't get any sleep and I started getting upset. It seemed like my meds weren't working l and I was in so much pain. My righthand was ice cold and I was getting the pins and needles and tingling feeling like before. So now I have all the same symptoms as before the surgery plus the surgical pain. I know that this might take some time and the doctors have told me that it could take six months before the symptoms go away if at all. I'm trying not to worry but it's hard. Here I'm starting to cry again because I feel like I'm going nowhere and I hate it. I'm so tired and I feel like I can't get through this. This whole thing sucks in every way shape and form. I can't do anything and I can even get comfortable. My neck is so sore that it hurts to touch except for the places it's still numb. I really don't know what happened yesterday and last night because my pain level was so high and nothing relieved it. I'm a little bit better today but my throat is sore voice still crackling and I keep getting constant twinges in my neck. I also keep getting the pins and needles and cold hand. I haven't even looked at the incision yet because the bandages have to stay on until they come off themselves. I don't really want to look at it anyways. I'm going to have one heck of a scar.

I finally started eating a little bit more yesterday but it's hard to chew and swallow and I can't open my mouth very wide which makes things difficult. I'm managing but i'm all by myself and I feel lonely. I realized yesterday while being by myself how much I couldn't do. My husband will be going away for a week and I don't know what I'm going to do.

I hate to ask this question but does anyone know how to relive constipation from taking all these meds? I have tried laxatives and Mirolax and neither has worked. The hospital gave me stuff to which did nothing and now I'm getting a little worried.

Oh and just an update on how things are going with my daughter not good. My ex-husband has her now and is managing her care because I am just not able to do it at this time. It's way too much stress and more than I can handle. He's now getting a firsthand look at what it takes being a parent of a child with problems and disabilities. Ever since the day she was born he expected me to do everything and he wanted no part of it. All he liked to do was work and eat out. He spoke to me yesterday and was all tired and frustrated saying how hard this is. He sure wasn't telling me anything I didn't already know. It's about time he steps up to the plate and takes control. He thinks he's going to be able to change my daughter overnight but over the last week he's starting to think otherwise. She will not be coming back here nor to the school she was in. We are working on trying to get her into a special school at this time. Well at least my ex-husband is. I really don't know what happened with her but I hope that she can turn things around for herself. We're unsure of her future at this time. Well I typed all this with the voice software and it worked pretty well but I'm tired so I'm signing off for now. Have a great day!

Momz

[DDayMBB]

OH MOMZ IT IS SO GREAT NOT HEARING YOU!!!! Really though sounds as your post op is going pretty good Hope your husband and daughter reach a ahhpy means... all-in--all prayers and thoughts are are wit you and your faour family Mark BB

[momzpeachy]

.mark - not hearing me? Not sure what you meant by that

oh well another crappy day back to my nap. My neck is spazzing and my nerves seem to be pissed off.

[Edelweiss]

am in a hurry, but I jump into the thread to say hello to you.

I send all my best wishes to those who are in pain and certainly to those who feel good today! :)

Barbara

[johannakat]

Today I am frustrated with feeling crappy :(

very emotional over something that probly isn't as big a deal as i am making it, yet i don't feel like i am overreacting, but then wondering if it is just one of my meds or my thyroid or who knows.....AAAARRRRRGHGHGHGHGHGH

it used to be so simple....i didn't have to figure out which of the 50 different things i put into my body or might be going wrong in my body or some odd combination of the two was causing me to feel the way i did.

and so I am stuck not only with the orginal problem, but the total frustration trying to figure out why i can't deal with it.
bunk.

thanks for letting me vent.

i love you guys, sorry i havn't been around much.

[LinJane]

Johanna I understand the way you feel. I recently stopped taking one of my meds due to forgetfulness. Unfortunately, it caused a very sick feeling, I am assuming was a withdrawal reaction. I will not let that happen again. I am so completely overwhelmed with work and money issues. Found out a technician who works for us has been stealing. He has been doing side jobs and having customers paying him directly while using our trucks and equipment on our time. Luckily a customer called us today to alert us. This sucks.

My son's surgery is on Monday and it couldn't come any sooner!! This has been the worst 2 months.
I hope everyone is doing ok. I hope everyone is feeling alittle better today.

Linda

[tshadow]

After surgery I had one solid year of no headaches...but then they started coming back.

My current main problem is just outrageous headaches, stomach / digestion, and my neck feels like it is too weak to hold my head. I had one day when this all left and gave me a break. Then, next day it's all back. (I always have right upper quadrant pain, then it's a matter of what else is going on...left side? legs? face? breathing?) Neurogenic TOS sure isn't just an "arm problem" as some of the docs I've seen say...I wish they could understand and feel the full extent of this neurological / vascular injury.

I am sure that this is all nerve related, since the one day was so good..

Hoping everyone with surgery right now, just over, etc., that all are doing well and going well along with recovery.

Remember that so far every person's recovery has been different, and that there is hope. I had TOS for four years before I had surgery, and in fact I worked for another year, so I think that impacted my recovery (to the negative.)

[Horizontal One]

After surgery I had one solid year of no headaches...but then they started coming back.

My current main problem is just outrageous headaches, stomach / digestion, and my neck feels like it is too weak to hold my head. I had one day when this all left and gave me a break. Then, next day it's all back. (I always have right upper quadrant pain, then it's a matter of what else is going on...left side? legs? face? breathing?) Neurogenic TOS sure isn't just an "arm problem" as some of the docs I've seen say...I wish they could understand and feel the full extent of this neurological / vascular injury.

I am sure that this is all nerve related, since the one day was so good..

Hoping everyone with surgery right now, just over, etc., that all are doing well and going well along with recovery.

Remember that so far every person's recovery has been different, and that there is hope. I had TOS for four years before I had surgery, and in fact I worked for another year, so I think that impacted my recovery (to the negative.)


Tam how I am with you on what you say. It was like a miracle post surgery to be migraine free. I had only the hormonal monthly ones and not plagued by the weekly and often a few days apart migraines. About a year or maybe a bit more in my case and they are getting back to pre surgery status. I hailed my surgeon a genius at the time for ridding me of some of them.

I have complained bitterly that my head is too heavy for my neck/neck too weak. I actually asked for a collar to help. Have tried but just makes me feel worse as the neck pain is nausea inducing plus that horrible fullness/hands round neck and horrible sensations up chin etc is made worse.


I have not posted for a while as my arms are not too good. I have been trying to reduce meds one at a time in order to see if can come off any as in pain so we thought that if no difference when one removed be good for me. Tried with the Ketamine first but having to re increase so soon with start on the methadone. I hate being drowsy all the time. And like has been said don't sleep well at night and then dosey in day due to drugs. Oh well.
Had a few chest infections which have knocked me about. Not good when diaphragm not good. C'est la vie.

I hope you all had a good festive season and new year. Despite not posting I do think of you all and wish you all better days.

I am having scans reviewed and maybe new set. Still awaiting other doc referral.


Take care all and I will try and post again soon. Bye for now. Hx

[tshadow]

I am still dealing with the autonomic nerve symptoms of the TOS.

The head pain is unbelievably high right now.

The stomach pain and breathing is now calming down.

I use meditation, praying, (my med schedule is set, so that doesn't change), and I just have to wait through it. It can go on for days.

[Shelley]

:hug::hug::hug: Tam, I am so sorry the pain is so high today.

Today mine arms are really sore. I visited my friend who just had a baby and held that baby for ours and boy am I sore. But he was so cute it was worth it.

[tshadow]

I agree with Johanna about some things lately.

I am having a hard time dealing with things that usually would not bother me. I think it is the heightened pain and the frustration with the new turn the TOS is having with me.

I always thank everyone for listening to me when I get in these moods, and for caring about the high flares of pain. I DOES matter and help when someone says they understand.

This pain is so isolating, also. Can't talk to my girls on the phone, or any of you guys, due to the pain on my face, hands, etc.

Thanks Horizontal for recognizing the head pains, neck pains. I love that when I worry I'm the only one with a certain symptom, that I can come here, post and someone else can identify. I am sorry Horizontal, though, that you can identify...the heavy head, neck pain, head swelling feeling (that I think is hardened skull muscles) is so unpleasant to say the least...

Well, God gives us a new day...I'll just wait for it.

[tshadow]

Dday, Mark, how are you? Haven't seen you post for a while. Missing you.

Also Dabbo, what's new?

Seems like we're missing some of our posters lately. Has anyone heard from Allison lately? Law76 is doing well, just busy!

[momzpeachy]

[QUOTE=johannakat;195570]Today I am frustrated with feeling crappy :(

very emotional over something that probly isn't as big a deal as i am making it, yet i don't feel like i am overreacting, but then wondering if it is just one of my meds or my thyroid or who knows.....AAAARRRRRGHGHGHGHGHGH

it used to be so simple....i didn't have to figure out which of the 50 different things i put into my body or might be going wrong in my body or some odd combination of the two was causing me to feel the way i did.

and so I am stuck not only with the orginal problem, but the total frustration trying to figure out why i can't deal with it.
bunk.

thanks for letting me vent.


Hi Johanna...



I can truly feel for you! believe me I understand how you feel and venting is good. Since my surgery I have felt crappy and I'm just getting more and more frustrated every day. This TOS totally sucks in every way shape and form. I feel like it has ruined my life and I don't have a life anymore. I was prepared for a tough recovery but the doctor never really explains what things are going to really be like. The last couple days I have totally lost it. On Sunday the kids were here I was keeping up with them and my daughter made cookies... it totally wiped me out. All I did was supervise and do talking and I guess being on my feet. By Sunday night I was so tired and felt horrible! I lost my voice again and it still has yet to come back. I guess my new name is going to be froggy. Yesterday I spent the whole day pretty much sleeping and crying. People keep calling to see how I'm doing figuring I'd be recovered by now. My mother-in-law doesn't get it at all a keep asking me why I still have pain and can't do anything. Everyone feels because it's been two weeks that I should be back to myself by now. Nobody seems to understand this surgery and recovery involved. Every time I talk about it I cry. Because I I want to be better and me again but I don't know when that will happen. I am still having trouble with my voice, trouble taking deep breaths (it hurts), pain shooting down my arm and in my shoulder, killer headaches that won't stop and just being tired. I talked to the surgeons office today because I'm concerned about the numbness in my chest, my neck and jaw on the right side. Also my skin is all bumpy around the incision. I was told that the bumpy problem is a side effect from the surgery and may or may not go away within a month. Also the numbness could mean several things and hopefully it will go away. Within a month postop if it does not go away... most likely its permanent. The nerves could have been damaged in surgery. Just another blow to my day and I cried some more. I don't want to be like this forever nobody has any answers. My doctor has increased my medication which is the Neurontin to 600 mg a day. I have extreme nerve pain and that med does work. I would rather take that then a lot of morphine. She feels I will have permanent nerve damage and will need this medicine for a long time. I still have no income and my workman, case is still going with no end in sight. My medical bills just keep piling up and I don't know what to do. It's been a year with no income I may never be able to return to work. I tried to apply for disability but I was short a credit which means I'm Short about $500 of income to qualify. Now doesn't that suck! I just can't do win in anyway no matter what I do. I just received a part of my bills for surgery. Just two days in the hospital (this is just the room and medications) total $35,000. And of course our insurance has us paying 10%! Now that doesn't even include the surgery or the doctors.

Life sucks at least mine does. I don't know where to go from here. I basically given up and don't care. Nothing is in my favor so I sit on the couch in my pajamas every day and sleep and cry. How exciting is that.

For those of you who who are pain free and able to get on with your life... I'm happy for you and for those of you who are like me I feel for you and with you. I feel for everyone with TOS I wouldn't wish it on anyone (other than my employer). Especially since they accused me of faking it! Man that ****** me off!

Well my voice is tired so I'm signing off.. have a great day!

Momz

[Jo*mar]

oh momz, :grouphug:

Please don't let yourself get stressed out.. I know it's very hard to not do that though.

Tell family and mil that even tho the incision is healing, it's all the internal things that got moved around and aggravated during the surgery that is what takes sooo much longer. to recover from.
Nerves are very complicated and any bothering of them takes a long time.
I guess keep it kind of simple but get the main point across that it does take a long time to recover and even then sometimes it doesn't fix everything.

Are you able to sleep well enough to get the restorative sleep?
You could be just very fatigued if not and that would make you more stressed too.

was your surgery part of the comp claim?
Just thinking my wc tx bills were on hold by atty while my claim was being appealed. { my claim had been denied after 6 months cause they thought I should be well by then. But only had multiple RSI as dx at the time and would do Ok until return to work}.
My atty wrote a letter to the hospital {MRI/XRAY bills} to put bills on hold - but I don't know how this applies in a open or accepted claim.

So you might check with your comp atty about the bills just to be sure you don't mess up your case.
Mine were on hold for about 2 yrs until case settled.
But I'm not an expert by any means on that, just find out as much as you can before you do pay out anything to anyone.

[LinJane]

Momz, did you say two weeks???????????????Only two weeks and you and your family think you should be ok???????? I don't mean to burst your bubble but it takes a long time. Nerves take a Very long time to heal. It took me 1 year to get were I have been. Very important to follow doctors orders. Don't raise your arm above your head, don't lift heavy objects, etc. Listen to what they tell you and do it. Have your doctor right the things you can and cannot do and post it in areas of your home so EVERYONE knows what you can and cannot do. This is important for the rest of your life.

After my surgery I was on too many meds. After around 9 months l had to go to Columbia Presbyterian in NYC to get off EVERYTHING. when I returned home, it was implied I would get up every morning and get three kids off to school, take care of the home, and go to work. I was so ill from pain and being taken off all meds I couldn't get out of bed. Now my husband is supportive but then I was yelled at to get my rear end out of bed and go to work. EVERY DAY. He had no clue. He didn't understand. He does now. It was very frustrating for everyone. I had family members taking care of my home and family and it made me feel worse. I think, if you can take control and ask for help in specific ways, ie, laundry, shopping, meals, I bet it would make you feel better by being in control and everyone could feel helpful. My problem had been, I did not know where to start. I am sure, especially if your doctor implies you could use some help, that family and friends would love to contribute.

Keep your chin up and only do what you can do!! Linda

[tshadow]

Momz,

you can't take this as law, because these things are changing constantly and I am not working anymore, but in CA, I seem to recall that it is law that for any work comp treatment bills, you cannot go against the applicant nor report it against the applicant's credit history (as long as the applicant fully identified the injury as a work comp injury to the health care providers.)

One would contact one's attorney with the bill, note that it hasn't been paid, and then the attorney should bring it to the adjuster's attention and request immediate payment. Also attorney should be asked to write a letter to the collection entity and demand they retract any derogatory report, based upon the law if you have it in your state.

IF the bill is disputed, (for any variety of reasons including a dispute of the injury itself), as long as the applicant identified the injury before treatment as a work injury (thus no fraud or misrepresentation went on), and again it was not paid right away, it still cannot be reported, the only recourse if for the medical treatment provider to file for relief in work comp court and/or wait until the judge decides the case - a "lien" or "bill" hearing should be filed by the medical provider for the judge to handle it. However, I seem to remember the applicant could also file these lien hearings, and ask the judge to make orders to have it taken off someone's credit history and to order them to stop pursuing payment by the applicant.

Please ask your attorney if something like this is the law in PA, just in case, your rights may not be fully asserted for some uknown reason. This might be in CCR 9785, 9791, 9792, but I haven't the ability to research it for PA or current CA law.

This is just a suggestion and is not legal advice.

I do wish you the best on everything, and ask family to either understand or withdraw from them - this sort of badgering is not good for your health at all! I've had very intolerant family members myself - it's not right nor fair nor reasonable under the facts of the situation. You're doing your damned best, damn it!

TOS is a marathon run, survival by taking each hour and getting through it.

Don't give up. We're here for you.

[tshadow]

How and where is:

Bicoastal?

Dday?

Seapines???

Does anyone have any contact with Seapines? Can you check on her for us?

HopeLivesHere?

Astern?

Peg24?

Dabbo?

Edelweiss?

Oh gosh, and the gal who owns the bed and breakfast...dreambeliever!

And can anyone contact Redjeep to see how she has been? It's been such a long time since she said she wanted to take some time off...

When do we do that check-in thread? I know I'm forgetting some of our friends and my special PMs...

[Edelweiss]

saw the ? behind my name in the thread of tamara - and here I am!
Thank you for looking after me.

I don`t feel bad but I don`t feel good - so how to say? I think I am ok (besides some migraines since last friday) but the inner preparation for the shoulder surgery which I will have on february 26th costs me a lot of energy.
And one question I want to share with you:
my shoulder-expert told me that he cannot understand why the subscapularis tendon teared again, without any accident or other reason.
So he thought that the reason might be my vascular TOS (fonctionnal-not constant) and that this shoulder region is not good supported. He told me, he looked worldwide in the medical studies but there is no similar case.
And so my question to you all (only because there is nothing written about it, people can be affected with it!):
have you ever heard about this possibility that TOS can cause "under-support" of blood, oyxygen,...I don`t know what else....of a neighbour region? and mainly tendons? And that tendons begin to tear?
I already thank all writers for answers - or for ideas where I can find informations.

I wish you all a good day without pain and without familiy-problems.
ALL THE BEST
Barbara

[KLS2007]

saw the ? behind my name in the thread of tamara - and here I am!
Thank you for looking after me.

I don`t feel bad but I don`t feel good - so how to say? I think I am ok (besides some migraines since last friday) but the inner preparation for the shoulder surgery which I will have on february 26th costs me a lot of energy.
And one question I want to share with you:
my shoulder-expert told me that he cannot understand why the subscapularis tendon teared again, without any accident or other reason.
So he thought that the reason might be my vascular TOS (fonctionnal-not constant) and that this shoulder region is not good supported. He told me, he looked worldwide in the medical studies but there is no similar case.
And so my question to you all (only because there is nothing written about it, people can be affected with it!):
have you ever heard about this possibility that TOS can cause "under-support" of blood, oyxygen,...I don`t know what else....of a neighbour region? and mainly tendons? And that tendons begin to tear?
I already thank all writers for answers - or for ideas where I can find informations.

I wish you all a good day without pain and without familiy-problems.
ALL THE BEST
Barbara
Does anyone know where to find some good info on functional vascular TOS?

[KLS2007]

I agree with Johanna about some things lately.

I am having a hard time dealing with things that usually would not bother me. I think it is the heightened pain and the frustration with the new turn the TOS is having with me.

I always thank everyone for listening to me when I get in these moods, and for caring about the high flares of pain. I DOES matter and help when someone says they understand.

This pain is so isolating, also. Can't talk to my girls on the phone, or any of you guys, due to the pain on my face, hands, etc.

Thanks Horizontal for recognizing the head pains, neck pains. I love that when I worry I'm the only one with a certain symptom, that I can come here, post and someone else can identify. I am sorry Horizontal, though, that you can identify...the heavy head, neck pain, head swelling feeling (that I think is hardened skull muscles) is so unpleasant to say the least...

Well, God gives us a new day...I'll just wait for it.
I second this....until now I thought I was the only one that had the feeling that my head was too heavy for my neck....I'm NOT crazy yet!!!!:D

[Jo*mar]

Does anyone know where to find some good info on functional vascular TOS?

I googled those words , here's the results list-
http://www.google.com/search?q=functional+vascular+TOS&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a

[hairdresser]

Today I got some good news about my Mom, she has been batteling an infection that almost took her life and her leg. Her c reactive protien is 14.9, normal is 8 or below. When first admitted in the hospital it was in the hundreds. The treatment is antibiotics through iv. I am still batteling chronic pain, I have my wc appeal Feb. 14th. I am trying to stay positive it's been a rough 3 months, it's so good to see many familiar faces posting again. I missed everyone.

[Shelley]

Hairdresser, that is great news about our mom. Congrats and :hug:

Sending positive thoughts about your appeal.

[DDayMBB]

Today I got really lost anfd will hae tave to have to lokkke kack and and see what is up... however wife just called me for diner!

[LinJane]

Mark Take it easy buddy. Say Go Giants a few times and you'll feel better! Linda:hug::p

[tshadow]

Mark, I can't talk on the phone but I'm checking PMs. Can you PLEASE PM me and let me know how you're doing, what's going on, what's new?

Thanky...

[dabbo]

Today I...
am feeling a bit better. My wife and I both had some hellacious cold. It knocked us down for 5-6 days. and her temp was 103+ for 4 days in a row.

Hope all are well.... gotta prepare for the big game!

[mtnmom]

Today I will shovel my driveway AGAIN! And be cold AGAIN!

Here is the snow and temp. report for my area in January:

18 inches of snow piled up last month, nearly matching the historic average of 18.6 inches. But cold temperatures kept that snow from melting away. The average snow depth for January is eight inches, but this year, there were 18 inches on the ground.

The average daily maximum temperature was 24.1 degrees, well below the historic average of 31.3 degrees, marking the first time in about six months that temperature reading stayed below average.

[tshadow]

Today I got quite sick from taking the B12 pills. I head voices, saw side views of people, saw hands going into my pockets and people saying things to me. So I drank a lot of tea and tried ease off the meds - as "supplements" they never have to produce any proof...

[LinJane]

Today I just wated tp say Hi. Very happy that the Big Blue GiantsWON THE SUPER BOWL:hug:

Sorry Mark. Dabbo, I think you must have been watching. It was a great game.

My son has been doing great since the pins came out last week. He went to the gym the same day as surgery. My daughter applied to 5 colleges. 4 sent accemptance(??? mom can't spell!!!) letters. The last we just need a personal interview. It is for LIM. That is her top choice but not mine. I am very proud of her. Johnson and Wales has offered my daughter scholarships for her participation in FCCLA and other organizatons. When she was in 2nd grade, reading was a great difficulty. Today, she is doing very well.

Thanks for letting me stand on my soap box and talk of how happy my children make me. They are the reason I get up each day. I hope everyone has a great Tuesday. Is anyoune here in a preliminary vote?? Thanks, Linda

[Jo*mar]

Tam, let us know how you're feeling tomorrow OK?
Dabbo, My niece just had a bug like that too -103* for nearly a week.:(

have a great day everybody
:grouphug:

[johannakat]

Today I got quite sick from taking the B12 pills. I head voices, saw side views of people, saw hands going into my pockets and people saying things to me. So I drank a lot of tea and tried ease off the meds - as "supplements" they never have to produce any proof...

tam- how much b12 did you take? that sounds pretty odd....

please feel better...and take it easy.

Johanna

[tshadow]

The B12 sublingual tabs seemed to have an immediate plus of lowering the pain markedly.

Unfortunately, fiance had to take dad to surgery, and my nurse announced rather last minute that she had to be trained for her voting booth duties...

So I'm still really dizzy and going to see doc tomorrow AM.

Will let everyone know if it's Vitamin B 12 related or not, as this B 12 was supposedly the wonder vitamin for nerve related illness from so many articles I read. No specific amount was ever stated however.

I've never seen people before as a side effect!

(That's going to be a source for a LOT of jokes, I know it.)

[fern]

hope you are feeling better Tam. let us know how it went.

tom. i have a repeat venogram. i had one 5-6 mos ago and am repeating it after my reduction surgery. not that the reduction was likely to help uncompress the vein but it was suggested that i try it. i am optimistic! my arm only swelled big w/exercise and i haven't built up my exercise prgm enough to know if the vein is still as compressed. they only did the test in 1 postion before but now it will be done properly. Funny, i saw a recent report fr a new pain doc that stated that i was too interested in the details or something like that. But what i find is that if i am not on top of things then tests are done improperly, etc. I phoned the hospital doing the venogram and they had the wrong instructions so i spent yesterday getting that corrected. And that pain dr. listed a handful of things on my history incorrectly so i know that my learned attn to details is actually a good thing! i'm feeling very worn out and down as i had a v. little slip on the ice 4 days ago and have been in spasms since. Also i am trying to sit tight until i have my CSF leak fixed. and that's a pretty serious surgery in itself as they go in through the skull. i guess this will be my year of surgeries. also my place is a terrible mess. I don't have the ability to do a lot of ADLs but I don't think I qualify for help. thanks for the rant. i did buy myself one of those robot vacs and i love it! a real joy to watch the robot do the work.

[Jo*mar]

Hope it goes well for you fern.

I wonder how Dabbo is doing in TN?
I hope nothing serious in his area, {tornados}:(

[tshadow]

The whole B12 issue has spiraled a bit out of control. While left alone due to hurse's volunteer pollstering, and hubands second patients, his dad, I was left alone feeling quite weird and paranoid. I tried to do nothing that could cause trouble. But with two little dogs, I did "see" something, fell, knocked out, for how long, etc. Dogs had enough time to lay big poops around me where the sliding door is, and to pee upon eachother's, (which means more time), as they can't stand to let one doggies brand to sit untagged, so to speak...

So anyways, new Dr. was quite pleased that I'd transitioned from oxy to morphine so well, with no bad effects (just had to phone in for an increase), but fine now. I couldn't explain if the talking and side visions were anything to do with morphine, b12 or ?

B12 is water soluble so probably hot it. You just pee out the extra. ALso, I like yeast lacto bicillus or something like that from the pharmacy refrigerator and must have it, and the over all thing is the now we've got pain come down, but we've got to clear the old brain.

He said since I hit my head, he wants an MRI or a CT of the head. I said, what about all of the radition, and I totalled the number of imaging to that region I'd had, so he joked, "oh, so you've got at least 200 more to go before you get your badge..." But he did make it MRI instead of CT to cut down on radiation. I trust him.

I'm not all that scared. So my body is doing crazy things - I can't control it any more than I could the color changes or worse, the pain! I don't have more pain with this, so I'm "cool" with it.

Also don't forget Epsom Salts in whatever temp bath you can stand and let the skin absorb it...

[tshadow]

I must go to bed, I cannot make the underline or the bolds go away...

Posting gods must be very angry with me...hhhhheeeeellllllllllllpppppppop (oh, exuse me)

[tshadow]

None of those replies made sense because while my nurse was gone, and my fiance had taken his dad to a surgery, I hit my head really hard on the white tile of the kitchen.

My doctor has seen me, and we are going through testing.

[Jo*mar]

fixed the formatting for you Tam- no problem :grouphug:

[dabbo]

Tam- I hope your head is ok!!
Lin- good luck with the drive, but i'm not exactly qualified to offer ANY advice on driving right now...and you're right- i was/am THRILLED that BIG BLUE won the superbowl (quiet shelley :p ). Maybe you'll see Eli when you go to Disney!

So- after the cold/flu it took me 2 days to not feel exhausted. THEN we had the tornadoes. That was some evening. We didn't have any damage, but we're only 2 miles away from the mall that was hit. That same super-cell dropped the tornado on Union University in Jackson, TN. It dropped an F1 here in Memphis, and an F4 in Jackson. I spent 30-45 minutes in a 3x5 half-bath with my wife and 18mo old. That was cramped. But, we didn't loose anything, so like i said, it could have been much worse.
Then on Thursday, I had a car wreck on the interstate while changing lanes. No airbag deployment nor did my seatbelt lock up and bruise me thank God. But, my neck has hurt like hell.... I didn't go to the ER, I went to minor med the next day. Doc said it was muscle stiffness and suggested heat, advil, and flexeril. THat has helped. Anyways... I gotta have the insurance adjuster take a look at my car. I hope its not totalled.... 2002 Camaro Z-28. 6-speed, t-tops..... I'm not ready to get rid of that car yet.

Take care to all!!

[beth]

dabbo, glad you posted, that was a VERY scary night! Weather's been crazy lately, we had a weird, INTENSE thunder and lightning show during a snowstorm while the Super Bowl was on last Sunday. Week before, on Tuesday morning it was 72 degrees in St Louis and dropped to 13 by evening, with 55 mile an hour winds. We got several inches of snow that night into Thursday. Monday the fog was so thich you couldn't see 3 car lengths ahead of you. All day. Accidents all over the place. Tuesday morning was warm and we had such nasty clouds scudding through the sky I thought we might be in for some tornadoes - not kidding! Instead the snow all melted, soaking everything, and a dead (waterlogged) tree fell across our driveway! Now it's bitter cold again and we're supposed to get 5-6 more inches of snow. Seriously wacko weather!!

I guess I can 'fess up if you can. :o My car came back from the shop Friday. Feel like an idiot, but SO thankful I'm not hurt. I spun out on gravel, tires have NO tread left I discovered (yeah, I do good car maintenance, NOT), totally lost control, hit a guard rail. Glad I did as otherwise I would have slid down a bank covered with brush and trees and stuff. Did quite a bit of damage to the front end - busted the tie rod :eek: Thankfully insurance is taking care of most of it, and hey, now I've got new tires AND they detailed my car! I'm also staying off the stupid gravel road which has more accidents than any around here - but is a straight shot to the highway, darn it!

6-speed? Ow, ow, ow!!!!!!!!! Are you NUTS, man?

[KLS2007]

Tam- I hope your head is ok!!
Lin- good luck with the drive, but i'm not exactly qualified to offer ANY advice on driving right now...and you're right- i was/am THRILLED that BIG BLUE won the superbowl (quiet shelley :p ). Maybe you'll see Eli when you go to Disney!

So- after the cold/flu it took me 2 days to not feel exhausted. THEN we had the tornadoes. That was some evening. We didn't have any damage, but we're only 2 miles away from the mall that was hit. That same super-cell dropped the tornado on Union University in Jackson, TN. It dropped an F1 here in Memphis, and an F4 in Jackson. I spent 30-45 minutes in a 3x5 half-bath with my wife and 18mo old. That was cramped. But, we didn't loose anything, so like i said, it could have been much worse.
Then on Thursday, I had a car wreck on the interstate while changing lanes. No airbag deployment nor did my seatbelt lock up and bruise me thank God. But, my neck has hurt like hell.... I didn't go to the ER, I went to minor med the next day. Doc said it was muscle stiffness and suggested heat, advil, and flexeril. THat has helped. Anyways... I gotta have the insurance adjuster take a look at my car. I hope its not totalled.... 2002 Camaro Z-28. 6-speed, t-tops..... I'm not ready to get rid of that car yet.

Take care to all!!


Sorry to hear you were in an accident, hope your car isn't totaled and you recover from it quickly!
As for the storms, glad to hear that you weren't in the immediate area. I was out on my balcony taking pictures the whole time, I got some cool shots of the water being sucked up out of the river!

[dabbo]

Beth...I'm glad you're OK too. I'm glad I didn't do any spinning around- that could have been bad. As far as the 6-speed goes, I probably am a "little" mad :D , but I'm also attached to the car. I figured out after shoulder surgery that as long as I don't shift when I'm turning, my left arm (the bad one) doesn't have to do TOO much work. I saw that weather up in STL... thats COLD. Things get scary when there's that much of a change.

KLS- I didn't get any pictures, but i've seen a bunch on the news that look pretty neat. That picture of the water getting sucked up seems really interesting. I hope you're ok too!

[johannakat]

just wanted to add a firendly reminder that if you are taking Effexxor at 150 mg...just because you went down to 75 mg with no real problems does NOT mean that you can just stop taking it :rolleyes:

yes, stopped on tuesday, and by thursday I was having wierd dizziness that reminded me of Tam's descriptions of out of body experiences. I felt like i was at teh central focal point of the universe and it was jsut coming in and out of focus around me....like i had been beamed up somewhere but they couldn't quite get me to materialized...i was stuck in a loop wher i couldn't quite land but i kept trying SO WEIRD!!!! I also had some severe nausea and cookie tossing which fooled me into thinking i just had the 24 hour version of the cold the rest of my family had. Couldn't get out of bed, couldn't walk, let alone drive...couldn't eat. Family was useless...! my hubby left me at home alone with the little kids after i told him i could not drive them to school. I then fell asleep on them for several hours until they were hitting me to wake me up. oops.

in any case, as the 24 hour flu went into day 3, i got up enough energy to look on the computer for what the withdrawal symptoms of effexor were, and turns out i pretty much had all of them...took half an effexor and the symptoms basically dissappeared.

I don't plan to try that again....i guess the idea is slow slow slow decreases.

feeling a lot better now, but wanted to just throw that story out there....

not going to try to get the rest of the way off till i am feeling better from next weeks surgery. I knew bad withdrawal symptoms were a possibility when i started taking it, but that was really weird and worse than i expected.

[hairdresser]

Today I met with a panel for my appeal hearing. I was so stressed and sore, from driving by the time I got there. My employers lawyer was there as well. I think my advocate and I presented a good case. The employer's lawyer must have been sleepy from his trip because he made alot of errors. YAH!!! I readily corrected him and was able to give a good clear picture of how my injury happened as well as how it reflects on my daily living. I am satisified that if it is not excepted, it's because it was predecided not to accept it prior to my hearing. I am so happy this is behind me, unfortunately my injuries are not. I must now wait for 14 weeks for a letter of decision from the panel. Well whats 14 more weeks after almost 4 years of waiting for a fair and just decision. Just thought I'd let you all know, because without everyone's support here I wouldn't have made it. So Happy Valentine's day and thanks to all that encouraged me and wouldn't let me give up.

[johannakat]

Today I met with a panel for my appeal hearing. I was so stressed and sore, from driving by the time I got there. My employers lawyer was there as well. I think my advocate and I presented a good case. The employer's lawyer must have been sleepy from his trip because he made alot of errors. YAH!!! I readily corrected him and was able to give a good clear picture of how my injury happened as well as how it reflects on my daily living. I am satisified that if it is not excepted, it's because it was predecided not to accept it prior to my hearing. I am so happy this is behind me, unfortunately my injuries are not. I must now wait for 14 weeks for a letter of decision from the panel. Well whats 14 more weeks after almost 4 years of waiting for a fair and just decision. Just thought I'd let you all know, because without everyone's support here I wouldn't have made it. So Happy Valentine's day and thanks to all that encouraged me and wouldn't let me give up.

good vibes to you and to the judge!!!

Happy Valentine's day

Johanna:hug:

[trixlynn]

coming off Effexor is REALLY hard. You need to come off it under a Dr.'s care. Go down to 75mg for two weeks, then 37.5mg for two weeks, then one every 2nd day, the every 3rd day etc. even then I spent the last week coming off of it in bed too sick to move. I have two girlfriends who had the same experience. My Dr. said he sees it all the time.
Trix

[johannakat]

coming off Effexor is REALLY hard. You need to come off it under a Dr.'s care. Go down to 75mg for two weeks, then 37.5mg for two weeks, then one every 2nd day, the every 3rd day etc. even then I spent the last week coming off of it in bed too sick to move. I have two girlfriends who had the same experience. My Dr. said he sees it all the time.
Trix

trix- yeah....it was my doctors suggestion to just stop at 75. I was a little suspicious, obviously my gut was right :)

i plan to split the 37.5's and see how small of a dose i can eventually ween down to before stopping.

wish me luck :)

[LinJane]

I hate to say this but I had been on SO MUCH meds a few years ago that I could not get off even slowly. It made me act as if I was drunk. I had to go to NY Presbyterian Hospital for 2 weeks. It was awful but I had been taking around 10 different meds that were unnecesary. We all know the drill, go to the doctor and they give you another script. At the time you think, ok, that will help. But, it piles up. Stepping down, and stopping meds is tough. Always check with your doctor. If you don't like the answer, get another. Been there!! Linda

[johannakat]

I hate to say this but I had been on SO MUCH meds a few years ago that I could not get off even slowly. It made me act as if I was drunk. I had to go to NY Presbyterian Hospital for 2 weeks. It was awful but I had been taking around 10 different meds that were unnecesary. We all know the drill, go to the doctor and they give you another script. At the time you think, ok, that will help. But, it piles up. Stepping down, and stopping meds is tough. Always check with your doctor. If you don't like the answer, get another. Been there!! Linda


yes yes, totally correct!!! I requested a change due to the 15 pounds i have gained in the last three months that i can only figure is from the effexor. My doctor suggested that Wellbutrin might work for at least the mood and ADD, possibly the pain, and was great for weight.. so the plan was to switch. I have started the wellbutrin but still on the lowest dose of effexor, going to concentrate on decreasing it after my surgery on monday.

After trying the effexor thing, I can't imagine how you could get off more than one at the same time. I felt as though i belonged in the hospital with just the effexor. You are quite strong to come through that and succeed on the other side.

I only let my pain management doctor prescribe anything for me aside from my thyroid medicine. At every visit i take a hand written list of everything i am taking, dosages/times, etc. as well as a list of what i have on hand, so it is easier to know what he needs to write for me. I used to guesstimate, but tended to overestimate what i needed and end up with too many extras. The actual inventory every month works better.

Many have posted and i totally agree it is VERY IMPORTANT to only have one person controlling your meds and that that person knows what he/she is doing! Because even when you have those controls, things can sure get wacky with these meds.

[pianoplayer]

Johanna,

I just added Wellbutrin to my mix - the doc is using it to try and fix my sleeping/waking problems. He said to take it in the morning (I take all my other pills at night, because it's easier to remember) because it has caffeine in it.

Sue

[LinJane]

Johannakat I know we are all very aware of all the meds we take. I am sure you have heard me post about my situation of getting off meds. I was in NYC for 2 weeks. I checked into Columbia Presbyterian on 9/10/01. I am a photographer at heart and brought my camera to the hospital with me. Only God knows why. I watched on Tuesday morning, 9/11/01 as the second plane hit the tower. I photographed and cried. Here I am, being taken off all meds and watching our world come to an end. My family in another state. Could not call because phones were down. I wanted my husband and kids. I wanted meds. I wanted a drink!! I was actually surprised that the staff was not overly reacting. I am sure they are trained to keep us "medically challenged" from freaking out.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!! Linda

[tshadow]

Well!!! Hasn't ANYONE wondered where I've been for the last 7 days????

[tshadow]

:mad:

(fake Jack Benny type of anger...)

HONESTLY FOLKS!!!

[fern]

where have you been Tam? I haven't checked in more than once this past week myself.

[tshadow]

I had high pain which then caused nausea which then halted absorption of my meds, which then caused even higher pain, obstruction of breathing, elevation of blood sugars and blood pressures...all of which were autonomic neuropathy and TOS...which landed me in the hospital for 7 days!

The nurses were highly compassionate - they saw that if we were late even by ten minutes for the morphine bath (via IV) that my hands, arms, chest, and face blew up into a fiery-looking appearance and I was in the highest pain. (screaming.) It took all of those days to calm it down. Several nurses said that the medicine that they saw me given was more than they'd ever seen given to a human being before.

I have started praying for a healing from God, through Christ.

I've already done ALL that medicine both traditional and otherwise can do for me. In fact, I got MOST of the TOS testing redone while in the hospital just to confirm my diagnosis again.

So I am in God's hands now.

Because of the breathing problem, I cannot talk on the phone at all. Please, if you love me, send me cards, but do not call, as it just makes the pain shoot up and I lose control of my breath again.

God bless you all. I look forward to catching up on everyone soon.

[Jo*mar]

I just thought you were taking some time away from the computer.
I'm glad you made it thru and that the nurses were nice.

[johannakat]

:holysheep:Gee Tam, i'm sorry...actually i did wonder where you'd been, but I have been struggling with the lack of effexor in my system and pretty messed up myself (i didn't realize it was doing quite so much for me).

it sounds very scary and I am certainly glad it has gotten under control.

i wish there was something i could offer in the way of suggestions or advice but i just don't know what to say. it is difficult for me to even comprehend what you must be going through. I wish every day for you to find some answers that will help you get better, and if there was something i could do to help that happen i'd be out there doing it.

gentle hugs and healing thoughts to you, friend.

:hug:

[KLS2007]

I had high pain which then caused nausea which then halted absorption of my meds, which then caused even higher pain, obstruction of breathing, elevation of blood sugars and blood pressures...all of which were autonomic neuropathy and TOS...which landed me in the hospital for 7 days!

The nurses were highly compassionate - they saw that if we were late even by ten minutes for the morphine bath (via IV) that my hands, arms, chest, and face blew up into a fiery-looking appearance and I was in the highest pain. (screaming.) It took all of those days to calm it down. Several nurses said that the medicine that they saw me given was more than they'd ever seen given to a human being before.

I have started praying for a healing from God, through Christ.

I've already done ALL that medicine both traditional and otherwise can do for me. In fact, I got MOST of the TOS testing redone while in the hospital just to confirm my diagnosis again.

So I am in God's hands now.

Because of the breathing problem, I cannot talk on the phone at all. Please, if you love me, send me cards, but do not call, as it just makes the pain shoot up and I lose control of my breath again.

God bless you all. I look forward to catching up on everyone soon.

I'm so sorry to hear that Tam!!!!

[Dolfinz]

Hi everyone !

Tam I am so sorry for all the pain and being in the hospital ! Hope you are feeling better..

I haven't been on the site either due to HIGH PAIN too my left shoulder has Frozen. I am now able to sit for a bit and type... It's the worst pain I have ever gone thru and I can't sleep very well on top of it ! I am in PT but we all know how that works for TOS and RSD people ! I need a big hug to get me thru this that's for sure !

I hope everyone is doing good and hopefully pain free !!! Hopefully I'll be able to write a bit more now...

Hugs to all
Dolfinz

[Stardust]

Hi Tam and everyone,

Tam, This sounds awful....So sorry you had to go through all this, on top of all the other stuff that's happened over the last six months....You must have been very sick indeed if they kept you in the hospital for a week, as I know they eject you immediately otherwise. Hope the nausea, breathing problems and pain are all well under control, and that you are finally able to rest and heal comfortably now.

I've been restricting my computer time--the computer really flares me up--and my life has been crazy busy, so I've hardly checked the forum in weeks....I feel very out of touch and have absolutely no idea what's going on with everybody....I hope everyone else is doing ok. Best wishes to all!

[dabbo]

Tam and Finz- i'm so sorry to read about your troubles recently. I hope that your pain levels drop at least to a manageable level. 7 days in the hospital would drive me up the wall. If I can do anything, please let me know.
gentle :hug:
dabbo

[mtnmom]

Tam - Im so sorry to hear of all that you recently went through. Sounds awful, but at least they took good care of you at the hospital. I hope you are feeling better now.

[mtnmom]

Thought I would share a newspaper article with you today. Fellow TOS'er and pro baseball pitcher Aaron Cook signed a four year deal with the Rockies. See below and Go Rockies!

Cook healthy, wealthy after '07 season

TUCSON, Ariz. - Sitting in the silent Colorado clubhouse while the Boston Red Sox celebrated their World Series sweep at Coors Field last October isn't a pleasant memory for any of the Rockies.

Yet, right-hander Aaron Cook looks back at that night with some mixed emotions, at least.

He lost Game 4 despite allowing three runs over six stellar innings in a performance that showed he was healthy again after missing nearly three months with a strained side muscle.

He said it was important for him not to have to spend a long, cold winter wondering about a comeback.

"I think it would have been tough," Cook said. "It definitely would have been hard to know I thought I was healthy and not had a chance to pitch. Fortunately, I did get healthy. They did give me the ball and I was able to throw."

It was his first appearance in more than 11 weeks, marking the longest layoff before starting a World Series game in the last half-century. Ultimately, however, he couldn't keep the Rockies from a suffering a 4-3 defeat that ended their magical season and had the Sox celebrating on their home field.

Cook wanted to return sooner but understood the Rockies' reluctance. The team was in the middle of a 21-1 run to reach their first World Series, a streak fueled by rookies Ubaldo Jimenez and Franklin Morales.

"I felt I was ready to go for a couple of weeks but the team was on a great run right there and they kind of wanted to leave things how they were," Cook said. "I did get a chance to pitch in the World Series and it was a great experience and I felt like I was totally healthy and I'm totally healthy coming into this year."

Healthy - and wealthy.

The Rockies' biggest offseason move consisted of signing Cook for $34 million over four years.

"It means a lot," Cook said. "The organization really stepped up. They wanted to make this happen. We were able to come up with a great deal."

Cook has never had arm trouble in his career but he's had serious health problems.

He left the mound at Coors Field in 2004 due to dizziness and a month later had surgery to remove a rib that was pressing against a vein and causing life-threatening blood clots. His inspiring comeback was capped last year when he was named the opening-day starter, then went 8-7 with a 4.12 ERA before going on the DL on Aug. 10.

The Rockies are counting on Cook anchoring their rotation this year.

"We're looking for a full season," manager Clint Hurdle said Monday. "We're looking for not a fragmented season but an opportunity to get to 200 innings or somewhere around that mark."

Although Hurdle won't address the issue this early, Cook said he thinks left-hander Jeff Francis, who won 17 games a year ago, will get the opening-day start this time.

Not that it matters to him, Cook said. He just wants to be a part of another Rockies' run. He even arrived two days early and found he wasn't the first one in the clubhouse, either.

"There's a lot more energy around here," Cook said. "A lot of guys are a lot more excited this year considering where we ended up last year. Of course, we're kind disappointed the way the World Series turned out but everything else that led up to it gave us a lot to be happy about and gives us a lot to look forward to."

[Edelweiss]

check in the forum to say hello!

I am busy at the moment:
my 4th shoulder surgery will be on february 26th and today I had an appointment to organize the physical therapy and the rehabilitation programm for the time after surgery. So I will start with physical theraphy and lymphatic massage on mars 19th and some weeks later I will start with the rehabilitation-training-programm.

Yesterday and today I have alexandertherapy and other treatments and I hope I will be in a good mood on thursday.

At work I have to prepare my "time out" during some weeks, this means I have to type some reports, etc etc.

But last week I spent 2 days in a spa center and this was like paradise on earth. From the warm water and the silent atmosphere I slept like a new born. This was so relaxing!

I am sorry to read about the pain/troubles of Tam and finz.
I send my very deep thoughts to all members here and hope that you will feel better soon.
All the best and a lot of good vibes!
Barbara

[Dolfinz]

Hi everyone....

Dabbo thanks for the well wishes and Edleweiss ( barbara) I hope that your surgery goes well.. the spa sounds SO relaxing I'm jealous ! Tam hope your feeling better. I do feel a little more loose today ( I should after a 2hr therapy session yesterday.. ) but I still can't life the arm above the waist and I know it will take time. I have an appt. to discuss a Cortizone shot the 27th so maybe that will help.

I hope everyone has a pain free and great rest of the week.. Hugs to all :hug:

Dolfinz

[Stardust]

Hi all,

Finz, Sorry I didn't see your message when I posted yesterday. Glad to hear you are feeling a little better. It might help you to know that I have a friend who has totally recovered from a frozen shoulder (but of course he doesn't have TOS or RSD to deal with).

Barbara, best of luck with your (4th?-wow!) shoulder surgery. It sounds like you guys get such fabulous health care.

Hugs to all.

[Edelweiss]

thank you guys for the good wishes!!

Stardust: you are right, we have a very good health care - but little by little we loose quality. Everything is a question of money and sometimes you have to pay on your own real good therapies,....
It`s long to explain but compared with the american systems it`s a dream!!

I wish you all a good day today and I hope arms, shoulders, fingers, ellbows, necks,.....dont hurt too much.

All the best!
Barbara

[Dolfinz]

Stardust...

Thank you for the well wishes. Do you know what your friend did to recover ?
This is so frustrating ! I felt good during the day but last night was a killer ! And sleeping .. well... when I get some I hurt even more when I wake up !

Hope everyone has a great pain free day !! :hug:

Dolfinz

[DDayMBB]

I am jusst Popping in.... I realize it has been a while since I hav been around... Between the famaily doctor, Dr Togut, Pain Dr. and the psych people who think I am just a stich this side of Crazy...I say hello, hope all are well and pass along my thoughts and prayers... Mark and Goober

[Stardust]

Hi Dolfinz,

I checked with my friend re: the frozen shoulder. He said that first he went to a chiropractor who made him do “range of motion” exercises. Then he went to an orthopedic surgeon, who gave him the cortisone shot in his shoulder and sent him to a physical therapist. The thought was that it might take him up to a year to recover, but he found that after the shot, a month of therapy, and doing the prescribed exercises, he improved. He says he still does (theraband?) exercises every night for 5 minutes.

Hope this info helps a little, and that you have a similar outcome.

P.S. I know a lot of people don't believe in the cortisone shots but I had them in my wrists for carpal tunnel syndrome and they gave me tremendous relief for about a year (?). My surgeon told me that occasionally, for some people the shots are sufficient, and that no further procedures are necessary. Unfortunately my carpal tunnel syndrome was so severe that I later I had to have endoscopic carpal tunnel release on both sides.

[Dolfinz]

Oh Stardust.. Thank You so much ! That did help out alot for me.. I see my PM on the 27th and I hope he says yes to the shot. Thank You for doing that ! I appreciate it. :hug:

Hi Mark.. nice to see you.. Hope things are well. Waiting for the snow storm !

Hope everyone has a pain-free weekend !

Dolfinz

[olecyn]

My Step-Mom had the same surgery a couple of years ago
They immediately had her in PT
She stopped going after 3 weeks due to the fact she could do the exercises on her own and she's just peachy.
However, she does NOT have have TOS, RSD, FM or and other CRPS that go along with our condition.

[olecyn]

TAM - Geeze Louize girlfriend. What the heck? Incredibly sorry I missed this.
You'll have to e/me and let me know. MY THOUGHTS ARE WITH YOU!!
I have been restricting myself on the the compooper so when I go on NT it's VERY briefly.

JohannaKAT - I hear ya on the effexor. I tried to get off the Lexapro for 2 months and crashed so hard each time. I hate all these meds fixating my brain and my fat bod. I used to be a skinny minnie until all this TOS "ish". Now I have to worry about obesity and liver issues with the pain meds, et all.

I know it's done with pain management groups with a team of physicians and specialists. I had it done years ago to determine if I was a candidate for the program. It was grueling but necessary to see where I was at. The W/C ins co ok'd the consults but denied the program...go figure. Sounds like they are cutting off their nose a lil' too soon.

STARDUST - Miss YOU!!

MOMZ - I feel and hear your pain/anger. I know how frustrating it is two-fold. Been there done it all. However, I fear you need a more superior TOS specialist intervening. Can I suggest something that may sound kinda kooky to you? The best thing I have done with all the TOS "ish", W/C, Retirement Disability & SSD madness, pain, frustrations is "GUIDED IMAGERY" therapy, healing cd's, and my husband reads to healing books to me since I cannot hold a book or get them on video. If you are interested, just let me know the books and tapes. I do anything to get me in a better place to over ride the pain and craziness TOS brings.

[dabbo]

Mark - it's good to hear from you! I hop you are doing well...

I hope everyone is doing well.....

[Peg24]

Am just feeling kinda sad today.

Missing loved ones who are gone.......feeling TOS pain some today and just I guess worrying about things in general.

Just one of those days!

I have not been visiting here much lately. I hope everyone is hanging in there.

Tam, I am so sorry for all the pain you are going thru.

I will keep you in my prayers daily!

Peggy

[Jo*mar]

Peg , I hope things are looking a bit better for you.

Just wondering how everyone is doing??
are we all waiting for spring- I know I am:)

[trixlynn]

Spring is just about ready to get started here! I can hardly wait! I am here. I saw my surgeon yesterday, and he is going to repeat all of the tests I had done pre rib resection. He saw a lot of compression when he went in before, and had to remove a lot of fibrous bands. He thinks I may need another surgery, and is not certain that I will get too much better than I am right now.
So, a little more info, and a lot more questions.
Where is Tam and everyone else?

[Dolfinz]

Hi everybody !

Peg.. I hope things are looking better for you :hug:

Today I .... Learned that my father is going to need a 2nd open heart surgery ( he is 71 ) asap... This is very risky due to the fact that he has a very bad heart ( has had numerous heart attacks ) I am here in New England in SO much pain and they are in Florida.... My father had a Catherization SP? done on Monday for a Coronary Blockage and the Surgeon said that when he got there the Artery was too old and calcified to be able to clean and then something showed up on the EKG and the doc looked behind his heart and found another artery that is 80% blocked !

This was never picked up on any of his films.. so I guess it's a good thing they did this and something went wrong ??? I miss my Dad very much and having this condition( RSD,TOS and Frozen Shoulder ) really stinks and is sooooo painful !!

Sorry to go on , but this Frozen Shoulder stuff is really making me sad... :( Thanks everyone for letting me vent.... Hopefully I will get down to FL soon ! Hope everyone has a pain free weekend... Hugs to all...

Dolfinz

[trixlynn]

I will keep your father in my prayers.

[johannakat]

Trix- glad your surgeon has some ideas. I think the possibility of some other treatment, or at least the positive path forward with someone who seems to want to help is a real boost to the spirits that can *almost* be as good as actually being better... I hope for your sake that you get some positive outcomes.

Peg- Your mom and your brother will stay with you for as long as you keep your memories of them alive. missing them is just another way to help you do that. :hug:

Dolfinz- ah, they never can pick good times to have trouble like this, can they? I will keep you and your parents in my thoughts hoping that everything goes well. keep us posted.

to everyone else- well i guess i am a bit blue today myself feeling like i wish i was healing better from my surgery,i knwo it has hardly been a week, but since my mom left and i have had to take over the household chores (severely limited to the neccessities) i have found myself beat to h3ll with no energy. I am sure it will resolve in time....I DID manage to call and get my FCE changed, though, so that's one good thing- i can just concentrate on healing without worrying about that.

hello to dabbo, cyn, allie cat if you are out there somewhere? tam- hoping your absence is not another extended visit to palm springs general, Mark, stardust, Bard, Dimarie, jo, shelle belle, sue, and everyone else my brain is too foggy to write out right now, happy evening, rest up and sweet dreams for a sunny day tomorrow.

later guys, johanna

[tshadow]

I am jusst Popping in.... I realize it has been a while since I hav been around... Between the famaily doctor, Dr Togut, Pain Dr. and the psych people who think I am just a stich this side of Crazy...I say hello, hope all are well and pass along my thoughts and prayers... Mark and Goober


I am praying a lot these days also.

I am too sick to use the computer or phone.

Dealing with trying to get nursing set up well.

You're not crazy Mark, you're a sensitive, kind person who doesn't deserve this hellish disease / condition.

God bless us and I hope someday to be with God with no pain and to understand why. Sometimes, it is really, really hard to keep my mind in a good place. So no, Mark, you're far from crazy.

God please place a peace and soft resting place for Mark tonight, and for all of us who need it.

[Jo*mar]

Peace and Blessings for all in pain....:grouphug:

[dabbo]

Tam and all those in pain- I pray that you find relief from your pain, and that you are able to rest. You're right Tam - it can be beyond difficult at times to keep our minds in a good place. In the 5.5 mo I've been out of work, I've had alot of time to think about that, and God knows I've struggled. I hope that I've learned something- maybe it helped re-prioritize my life.

I start a new job on Monday (Mar 3rd) as a bond salesman. I'm already getting a little nervous!!

Take care... :grouphug:

[Jo*mar]

Good Luck Dabbo:)
I think you'll do great.:D

[johannakat]

Dabbo- the good luck gnome is rooting for you and so am i :)

http://www.creativethursday.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2006/12/good%20luck%20gnome.jpg

[trixlynn]

Good luck Dabbo, I think you'll do great!

[Dolfinz]

Good Luck to ya Dabbo :hug:

Today I had the worst emotional day ! I had a HUGE blow out with my 22 yr. old son and his girlfriend. She has been "staying" here and it just is not working out. So she packed all her stuff in a huff and left with my son. There have been things leading up to this and it was just a matter of time. But it still hurts when you care about you kid but you don't trust his girlfriend......And now my shoulder is just throbbing !:(

Thanks for reading and Thanks to all my friends here... I hope you all have a pain free week :hug:

Dolfinz

[johannakat]

:hug:Dolfinz:hug:

feel better soon.....i totally know where you are. Kids are SOOOOOOO frustrating!!! My hubby and I got in huge fight saturday night (the kind where one of us start throwing around the "D" word which is a BIG NO NO) and we yelled at each other for about an hour before realizing that it really started when our 15yo mouthed off at both of us. I mean, we reacted poorly, and own that, don't get me wrong, but she can really get under both our skins and then we start on eachother. Once we realized that, there was practically nothing to fight about anymore and it all just dissolved. ack!!!! waste of energy and pain, that's for sure.

I hope you'll both have a chance to cool down over the next couple days and regroup...cooler heads usually prevail.

:hug:
Johanna

[dabbo]

THank you for the good luck gnome! I'm wondering if this job will involve as much computer time as my last one. regardless, i'm going to have to get all the ergonomic keyboards and junk. yipeee.

Finz - I hope that you are able to resolve this after a couple of days of cooling off.

Heather and I were sick last week AGAIN. More of that chest cold/coughing/ nauseous crud. booooooooo. Need good weather again!

[LinJane]

Hi everyone. I haven't been around in awhile. I am so sorry you all are having so much pain. I can also sympathize with having arguments with and/or over teenage children. My 15year old son has been home from school with his broken leg since mid November. He goes back to school next week. Horray for both of us. He is itching to get out. Pain also causes me to react more dramatically than necessary.

On a good note, we returned from Disney on Sunday night. I don't know if any of you have heard of Disney's "A Year of a Million Dreams" promotion. They are trying to make dreams come true. Whether it is a fast pass on all rides for a day, a shopping spree or a night in Cinderella's Castle. People are picked randomly.

My son Danny, who is 12, won our family one night in the Castle!!

Last Tuesday morning we went to MagicKingdom in the morning. My father was staying with us. My Buzz Light Year. When we got off the ride 2 Park Employees approached my son and informed us that he won!!

We had to return to our room at the Boardwalk and pack for 1 night. We had to return because we would be the Grand Marshall's of the 3pm Parade. My daughter, Ryann and I had to buy Erin her Cinderella dress for the parade and go back and pack.

The parade was spectacular and everyone made a point of singling out Erin, who is 5. She was so excited. After our part of the parade we had a special place to watch. We then were taken to the Castle Suite. It was beautiful. It was very ornate. A very large jacuzzi with mozaic tiles on the walls that lit up. The ceiling looked like twinkling stars.

The painting over the fireplace turned into a mirror, then a tv. All lights, fireplace and tv's were run off the same remote. We had pictures with Cinderella and dinner in the Royal Dinning Room (just a fancy restaurant in the Castle). We had special seats for the evening parade and fireworks. Everyone was escorted to rides so there wouldn't be a wait. We then had a Character breakfast with Winnie the Pooh the next morning. No hotel with ever be the same!!

I can not tell you how special the day and night were. We will all remeber this forever. I was happy that my dad was with us to enjoy it. We were told the chances were 1-3 million.

Just remember, Dreams can come true!! Linda

[Dolfinz]

Hi everyone !

Johanna.. Thanks for the post it makes ya feel good knowing your not the "only" parent that goes thru things. and I hope you and hubby are o.k. Dabbo.. thanks for making me feel better...

Well, Monday night he and his girlfriend came back over and annouced that they were moving in together ! I wished them both well (even tho i don't approve) I told them I don't know how they will make it.. but I said that if he needed me I would be here.... ( sigh) My one and only is gone ! It feels weird with him not around but I don't think it will last... My shoulders have taken a beating from all the stress i know that !

Linjane.. WOW what a nice surprise ! It must of been wonderful !!!!! So nice to hear someone you know actually gets a chance to do something like that !
Good for you and your family !

Thanks for everyone caring ! Hope everyone has a pain free rest of the week

Hugs, :hug:
Dolfinz

[tshadow]

Dearest Mark,

If you happen to see this message, I want to remind you to keep your promise to me.

I am in terrible pain right now. PLEASE try to remember the pain does rise and fall, and we will have better times ahead. (We all have to remember the cycles.)

God bless you, keep you in His arms, and put angels around you.

Tam

[tshadow]

knowing your not the "only" parent that goes thru things. Well, Monday night he and his girlfriend came back over and annouced that they were moving in together ! I wished them both well Dolfinz

Dolfinz,

God knows all of the problems I have had with my children. This TOS also contributes so much to their pain, growing up.

This is NONE of my business, and I could be totally wrong, but here's how I see it.

One, I would not let his girlfriend move in. I would try to find her somewhere else to move in - church, other friends, etc., but not with my son.

Two, my son (if I had one) at 22 is no longer a child, minor, kid, etc. He HAS to get his own place. And if he does get his own place, I then can't demand who he has live with him, only tell him I don't think living together works out because they are too young to make such life commitments to another adult. They are growing adults. He should have a guy roommate, or rent a room out from somewhere, NOT have a basic marriage to deal with. (Is this making sense - yes, to moving out, NO to a marriage type situation.)

Third, I'd tell him AT ALL COSTS do not get pregnant. I'd talk a LOT about that.

I would help him with a budget, and show him how to do his checking, earmarking funds, an emergency fund, and if nec., help him with cash if he is trying hard and it really wasn't "his fault" that things went wrong.

I'd be talking about school constantly - what he likes, where his heart lies, how he can make his dreams come true.

I am at this stage with both of my girls, 20 & 25. We talk about the above all of the time, and my focus is on being a supportive and creative mom, NOT a criticizing, you did it wrong, mom. It's EASY to be one of those you did that wrong (after the fact.) It takes a LOT of energy to be a creative, let's talk about it before it goes wrong.

Now that he's living with the girl, I'd never blame her for ANYTHING. I would try to get him to see (whatever he's complaining about) how he could either change it by changing his living arrangements, or at least change how he reacted. I'd put it all back right in his lap, as to what are you going to change.

Well, arms hurting, gotta run, please don't think I'm preaching (which it sounds like) or that I'm any GREAT mom, (my kids sure criticize me!) But my job as I see it is to make my children as self sufficient as possible, and also, having high values and being sensitive to others. Responsible, good decent humans. And they are. So we work through these problems. I am not afraid of saying something and have my kids "not be my friend" or even hate me. I never say "you are ____" because I don't believe that, I think people make or do good or bad decisions, and I try to show them the "choice point" where it is they had the chance to go right or left (if after the fact.) Hopefully, we always talk about it BEFORE it happens, but not always...

God bless your son and his girlfriend and hope they make some serious and smart decisions soon.

And always LOVE. I know you LOVE, you can see it all over your post...hahaha. You are sure a loving parent. I'll pray for him also. Ah, isn't it the hardest job of all to be a parent who CARES?

Tam

P.S. I don't look at these "living in" relationships as sin, just my personal opinion, but what is important to me is that the "more" problems they can cause and if a person is really ready to be responsible for and to another person and how complicated that can be. It is hard enough to start out without adding more complications such as that, and if the girl could or would find a safe place to live on her own while dating your son, that would also show her maturity and care for him to let him have a start on his own first. But we can say that, and what they do is their decision, of course.

Gosh this sounds preachy, and of course, I can't stop talking...

[DiMarie]

I am jusst Popping in.... I realize it has been a while since I hav been around... Between the famaily doctor, Dr Togut, Pain Dr. and the psych people who think I am just a stich this side of Crazy...I say hello, hope all are well and pass along my thoughts and prayers... Mark and Goober

Hey Mark, I missed your call, as with you have tons of appoinments and life challanges. I am concerned and think that you need to turn to Cathy to take over some stresses for her. Listen to that special gal, as with De sometimes I had, no with her I all the time had to tell her hat I felt and saw, good, bad and ugly.

TOS is too big for us anyone to manage alone without a support system. Then too some meds, especially tropsychogenics (sp) can play a role we would not make choices with out them in us. Like the one medication you take like I said I feel takes a toll. De has no memory of her years on it. None of life events can she recall.
The next part is emotional Mark, if you are reading do NOT read it !!!!!!
I am just having probblems with little Katies depression.
Be well, I am praying for you Di
__________________________________________________ _____










TOS Family,
My Katie 12, is having real problems. THree years she was really having anxiety from being picked on or teased at school, then with the loss last year it was taking a toll. After being pinched in school just before Christmas she had difficulty attending tried a few times ans really set her back. I have had appointments with advocates, therapists, pediatrician, school, and she is being tutored right now. It does not look as she can emotionally return to the rest of the school year, not to that school.

I am having a tutor. and jumping hoops for the school system for the 5 hours of home schooling. I am paying for a tutor now and winging it with homework. Katies last two report cards were all A's and 1 b+.
It is social anxiety and school phobia due to post trumatic stress and bullying diagx.

On top of the older sons shoulder surgery, my younger son has not worked in a year and is in therapy for depression.

I know from the report De did not take her life, but medications were theraputic doses as to autopsy report....BUT her accidental death, if she ever would have thought it possible she would have choosen to alter medications, to not be taken from us. Our family will never be the same without her.

Three of us in therapy, the older son, trying to carry the load of keeping us busy, his own TOS and back problems, stay at home Dad taking care of Cgrandson and money wow's. I am his primary source for child care for all his appointments. He is so stressed.........My husband works, comes home, cares for Katie the evenings I work. Does a few chores.

TOS eats a family: a loss of any member of a family member is devestating, a death that could have been avoided, leaves its guilt on us behind forever.
I know from the toxicology it was an accidental death, but one that my hand handed her medications, in theraputic doses that took her from me....I never checked on her when she did not answer the phone at 2:00 AM, I could have saved her then,

I had saved the life of one of her gf's that OD on heroin years ago with CPR until EMG came and gave narcon, I called a mother that her son called and said he took leathal dose of drugs to end it and he had CPR performed from the intervention to bring him back.....but I did not check on my own daughter........

[Dolfinz]

Hi everyone !..

Hope everyone had a somewhat pain free day ! :hug:

Tam- I don't think that was preaching at all !! Please I welcome other people's words of wisdom ! I am a single parent- got divorced in 1987. Ex has really nothing to so with him.. so I raised him myself and with the help of my parents... I do do alot of what you said.. and He and her are living in her apt. They came by today to do laundry..it was nice to see them.

I did have a long talk with both of them.. warning I don't want to be a grandmother just yet.. They said they totally agree and that he is going to give it a try.( It will be good for him ) I told him the door is opened if HE needed to come home... Thank You very much for putting smile on my face with reading your post. :hug:

DiMarie.... I am SO sorry that you are going thru so much my friend !
If there is anything I can do please let me know.. I give you many hugs...:hug::hug::hug: Please keep your head up, your an amazing woman !

Hope everyone has a great day !

Dolfinz

[mtnmom]

Hey there everyone! Havent had a chance to stop by for awhile...

Great advice and I couldnt agree more, Tam. My kid has lots of friends but only one mom. Being a parent is tough - we parents are only human, just like our children. Let face it, we all know what is best for our children, we are the adults and they are the kids, we have "been there, done that". Some of the biggest failures in life, I have had to learn on my own. Some of the biggest sucesses I have had in life, I have learned on my own. I find that one of the hardest things about being a parent is standing back and letting small mistakes and failures happen to him .. but sometimes sucesses happen instead. He has to learn the good or bad lesson on his own. They have to "go there and do that" too.

You all, just like me, are doing the best parenting job that you can and your kids come first. Communicate, love and support your child, no matter what their age, and they will be okay.

Dolfinz, Im sure your son sees you as a very strong and brave woman and he will probably realize that even more now that he has moved out.

Wishing you all the best and hoping you have very little pain today, physically and mentally!!!

[johannakat]

Di- Friend, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't take blame on yourself. You are such a caring, supportive, and wonderful mom to your brood. To hear you express any guilt for not having done something breaks my heart. There is NO WAY you could have known what was going to happen that particular evening with De. It is IN NO WAY your fault!!!!!

It will be a long journey to get over this tragic event for you and for your family, but with time, patience, caring, and SELF LOVE, you will get there. You have been robbed of your baby and it isn't fair, but it did not happen through any fault of yours, it was simply a horrific set of circumstances for one woman and her family to have to deal with. You have all done all you could to support her, much more than many moms would have been able to provide.

Please take good care of yourself and let any feelings of guilt go. Concentrate on the beauty of her life and the wonderful time that she shared with you. Take the time to heal yourself and give the energy you will gain from doing that to little Katie.. You are an amazing fabulous mom and you give SO MUCH to everyone around you.

:hug::hug::hug:

[dabbo]

Di- I am so sorry to hear what you are going through again. If there is anything at all that I can do please PLEASE let me know. I can't fathom how hard it is to lose a child, and like JoKat said, you can't blame yourself for not knowing what would happen that night. Please remeber that we are here for you throught it all.
Finz- i think its great that you told him that your door was still open for him- that is true love; I hope that one day (if I wind up in a similar situation) I can have the strenght, patience, and knowledge to work through it. :grouphug: dabbo

[hairdresser]

Today I feel so sad. My Mom is doing better,she is off of the antiobiotics through iv but taking the same drug by mouth. She is stable for now. Two weeks ago we had to call the ambulance for my Dad. He couldn't breathe. He got a cold about 1 month ago, we thought he had phenumia. The Doctor's have taken 3 litres of fluid off his lungs so far, and it keeps accumulating.
The Doctor is doing a lung biopsy tomorrow, the fluid has been tested, it is inconclusive.Seems that Dad had a summer job in 1942 while going to University, insulating war ships. The insulation used was asbestos. Honestly I just wish I didn't feel so helpless.


DiMarie Please don't blame yourself. If we truly were in control,sickness and death wouldn't exsist. I am so sorry that terrible things happen to good people and families.:hug:

[LinJane]

DiI am so sorry youl are having such a difficult time. I have corresponded with you online for about 6 years. From all I have ever learned from you is that you were a wonderful mother. Please do not be so hard on yourself. We all play the "what if" game. Unfortunately it doesn't help it only occupies our mind in a negative way. Please celebrate De's life and try to do whatever possible to help Katie. Being a mom is the hardest job ever. Be easy on yourself.

Dolfinz I can't say I know what you are going through but I do have 4 kids and each are different. My 17 year old daughter is so easy. i thought she would be difficult. she likes to spend alot of time with her family and the friends she has i like and trust. I always know where she is. She calls when she is on her way home from school, which is only 10 minutes away.

My son who is 15 years old is going to be my killer. Great kid but loves to antagonize and argue. He sees it as sparring(?) But, it ****** me off! He is a great kid and good student but knows how to push my buttons. He goes back to school on monday after almost 4 months home with his broken leg. I think he'll make a great attorney.

I think we all need to enjoy our families as much as possible. I am learning that I can't blow up over a dish in the sink. Even though it bothers the hell out of me.

Also, stress hurts us TOS'rs. I did well on our ride to disney. I ended up driving most of the way again but took precautions. I had a pillow and my blue foam arm rest. i did not allow myself to tense up and took lots of breaks. We had a frew problems on the way but it ended up being a great vacation. My 5 year old Erin loved staying in Cincerella's Castle and everyone else had a blast too.

I did have a run-in with a gas nozzle. We in NJ are spoiled and don't have to pump our own gas. We were in NC and getting gas. My husband, Dave, put the nozzle in and went in the store, I thought I would be nice and take it out when it was done. When I took it out I must have pressed the nozzle and gas went all over my clothes and in my eyes. I had to change clothes and wash it out of my eyes. The car smelled of gas the rest of thetrip!

I also ran over a major curb on a rainy night and screwed up my shocks. We had a very interesting but fun trip. I have one other school next week to see with my daughter. We are going to Johnson & Wales in RI. I enjoy the time with her and hopefully she can make a decision soon.

Dabbo, I hope all is well with your job.

Tam, I hope you start feeling better, you have gone through alot lately.

Mark, haven't heard from you in awhile, hope the pump has made some sort of difference.

Best wishes, Linda

[Dolfinz]

Hi everyone !

Gosh it's nice to see the sun and the temp is good. :cool:

I hope everyone is having a good week....

Mtnmom: Thank You for making me smile ! I am o.k. with his decision, I do believe that he may come back, but I think this is the best for him learn and hopefully not get hurt emotionally! ( They are living in a BAD part of town too..).

Dabbo: Thank you ever so much my friend :) How is the job going ?? Hope you are well.

Hairdresser: I know what you are going thru.. Hope Mom is o.k. and Dad too.. My Dad is going in for Open Heart on the 17th for the 2nd time ! And I can't be there...but he is in good hands.. Hang in there.

Linjane: With 4 kids I'm sure it isn't easy.. My son didn't really start giving problems till he was about 19.. He will learn and hopefully stay safe and I will get thru this.. Thanks for being a friend ! Hope things get better with your son I know that too ( 2006 mine had knee surgery ! 6 months with him -ARGGGGG
But we got thru that too. :)

Di- hope things are going o.k... We care about you very much ! Hang in there.

Thank you all for lifting my spirits and the confidence ! :grouphug:

Hugs and blessings,

Dolfinz

[dabbo]

Finz- I hope your dad surgery on monday is a success....

Today I- realized I REALLY need to get that ergonomic keyboard hooked up at work, and to watch my posture.... my left hand started trembling on and off today- taht was a tad disconcerting. On a good note tho my securities license was finally transferred, so now I can start trying to sell! Lets just hope that I have some good (and quick!) success.

hairdresser- i hope your folks are getting better..
Di and Mark- haven't heard from y'all in a while, and I hope you are doing well.
Tam- take care of yourself
Shelley (the smelley :D ) and Peg - long time no talkie... i hope things aer going well. I was down your way Peg like 2 or 3 weeks ago- I went to Tampa/St Pete on an interview.

[DiMarie]

HI Gang, Just stopping in quick to read and let you all know I am praying and hugging you all. One day at a time, but at this point sometimes it is morning- afternoon, then night at a time.

The plate seems so full at times I went from a dinner plant to a platter. To get it through to the family I think I will literally write every concern and issue I carry in my head and heart on a Turkey platter in the middle of the table. They can feel free to take one from the platter to deal with for me!
Even the chores!
Long day, and working all weekend,
Wishing you and yours well, Love
di

[hairdresser]

Today I went to the Hospital to visit my Father. He is still coughing alot, and weak. He is scheduled for a video-assisted thoroscopic surgery this coming Thursday. http://www.mayoclinic.org/video-assisted-thoracic-surgery/

I am so tired tonight, just exhausted. I'm so worried about my parents, and struggeling to keep up the unrelentless visits to the hospital,and to my mom's to help out. The driving is really flaring me up.So tonight I'm hoping to knock myself out with an added zanaflex. I need sleep.LOL
Dolfinz hope your Father is on the road to recovery soon. Thanks Dabbo for your good thoughts.

[Dolfinz]

Hi everyone !!

Dabbo.. Thanks for thoughts.. Please say a prayer..:hug:

Dimarie: I hope everything is going o.k. glad to hear from ya ! Here's to hoping things get a bit better for ya....:hug:

Hairdresser: God do I know how YOU feel ! I had to do that last year with my mom and dad.. mom had major back surgery and I was in FL for 3 months trying to take care of her and my father,, who ended up in the hosp. too at the same time !!

I am the only child so it is just me and some friends of theirs that can take care of them ! So hang in there.. You are doing a great job, it is tiring but when they are in better health you will begin to feel better knowing that you did what you did for them ! It's a great feeling !

I will say a prayer for your parents ( my dad is going in for open heart Monday and I can't be there *sigh* )and hope that things turn around for the better !

I hope everyone has a great Pain Free week !!

Dolfinz

[momzpeachy]

Today I am trying to figure out how to get out of this mess I am in. I hate my life! I hate having TOS! I just hate it all!

I now with that I would'[ve stayed single years ago and never remarried. I went from a bad marriage to a worse one. I seem to find the controlling men. I don't know how to get out of this one though. I managed to get out of my first marriage because I was working back then. Now, I'm now working, can't drive, and have no money. I want badly to get away from the hell I'm in. I just don't know how. I got in a huge fight with my husband...ick I hate that word now. Last night, it was awful...again he can never admit he's wrong and again it started a huge fight! Well I hit him and then he kicked me ..so hard I can't walk today. Also I tried to get my keys to get away and he yanked them from me..hard. They were in my right hand. I probably have everything screwed up now in my neck and shoulder. I am in excruciating pain now. It's also in different places then it was in. I just give up. ALso, this has now begun on the left side and the PT noticed it. I have a huge mess. The PT couldn't even do anything with me yet.

I want to leave but I can't lift my suitcase. I have no family here other than my kids. I have my son here and my daughter with my ex. Sheesh, what a mess. I am still on lots of meds. I don't know what to do. The only place I can go is Florida. But I need my meds so how do I go there? My husband took my keys away so i can't drive so now I'm stuck ..can't walk, hurting badly and hating life! I am sorry to vent here but I don't know what to do. I at least had another bedroom to move my stuff too and that's where I'm at now. I can't even look at him..I hate him so much for what he's done. I hate him!

I am tired of dealing with all this crap. I can't get better either..I only get worse. Now what?

[ocgirl]

{{Momz}}

I'm so sorry you are going through this.

I'm very concerned about your safety:(

Here is a toll free number for
*National Domestic Violence Hotline:
1-800-799-SAFE

Most people especially women are most afraid of being victimized by a stranger in their home or in the outside world.

Studies show that the man of the house is most likely to commit violence against his wife.

Wives and husbands are the most common relationship to be involved in family murders.

I'm very concerned that he kicked you.

You must find a place that is safe and if you have children with you they must be safe also.

I don't know how old your children are...would they be able to take you in?Any friends ( I know how it is when you have tos friends stop calling)

Can you call a pastor?

What about a restraining order for your safety and protection.

Even take a taxi to a motel just for temporary cool off period for your safety, or even a women's shelter (just temporarily )

You can call your doctor 24 hours a day, they will have someone on call. Once they know that there is a potential domestic violence situation I think they are supposed to act on it.

In the front of the phone book there are usually hotline help centers.

This is a phone number for the National Center for Victims of Crime helpline. I believe it was a crime that you were kicked.

1-800-FYI-CALL

also in the front of the phone book there are phone numbers for
Emergency and crisis intervention services like:

*Women's Transitional Living Center (WTC)
* County social services
*information services-here it is called
InfoLink of Orange County
*Legal Aid Society
* shelters for battered women

*Catholic charities outreach
*Lutheran social services
*New Hope hotline help center/crisis intervention

Where I live there is a service where you just dial
211 and they give you advice on social services you may need. I don't know if it is available where you are.

Also, in the front of our phone book is a phone number for:

*Abuse and family violence services
*Battered women's self helpline
*crime prevention specialist.(a government office)
*Family resource center
* victim assistance program
*domestic violence services
* fair housing
*homeowners and renters assistance
*family law information

There is also a number to call if you are unable to find the county office you need to call

Momz,
Please, please, please take action to insure your safety. Please keep us posted here.

You have rights, I know it's hard because you feel so bad.

God bless.

[Jo*mar]

wow.:eek:. I know from watching cops and the court shows that usually the one that throws the first punch is usually the one that gets cuffed:(
much better to walk away than either of you getting physical with each other. Just can get to be a bad and expensive problem.
And for the reason of preventing any re injury to the surgery site.

Ocgirl posted some great resources.

If things change after you both have cooled off and if you both decide to stay together it sounds like some counseling is needed.
Which probably is something most couples could use when one has a chronic or severe health issue.

But if fights are increasing and escalating - protection of you and you children comes first.
Your family is in FL? Could they help with bus or plane tickets if you decide to leave?

[DiMarie]

The first step is the hardest step, a plan helps. Being in NE PA and I have a friend that works with our agency at the local DV center, I can get some connections and local phone no. for your area.
Momz, when my brother did the same thing with a cell phone in my hand that I was recorder his bizaar attack on me, I was given a protection order that empowered me.

This was a family estate issue and power.....He still continures to harass, steal, stalk me, but at least I have tools to work with now.
With the friends here and the power we all send you and love, you will get better emotionally day at a time. BUT get the "plan" together you will get lots of support.

There is a way to implament and steps that guide you. I am not specialized in this area, been a victim, even though I am a 20 year law enforcement person I needed help and support.
First thing, can you get to your PCP to treat your flare...this is important. If you have to is there a bus or spare key, CALL PD. Tell them the jerk took your keys and is preventing you from leaving the home. This documentation is critical, DON'T FLINCH it is for you forget about his feelings!!!!
While it is not a kidnapping it IS AN UNLAWFUL RESTRAINT and against the law!!!!!
The PD will take you to get the protection order, even if it is a no touch contact and he is in the home! From there an advocate can get you to a medical center for flare, stress, anxiety and the trumatic scare you have.
Di:hug:
PS Grab everything you get your hands on and make a copy or take it! Policies, car titles, insurances, birth certificates, bank books, snoop, look everywhere for anything that this behavior started to escalate.....

[LinJane]

Momz You cannot allow yourself to be a victim. When I was 18 I was in an abusive relationship and I was scared to leave. He stalked me for awhile and scared the hell out of me. He finally gave up when he realized I wasn't intimidated by him (even though I was, I put up a good act). Small physical violence just escalates. Please take all the advice given and protect yourself. Talke care and keep us posted. Linda