The great Hooters debate...

[legzzalot]

DD6 came home from her daddy's house with a Hooter's shirt. He doesn't understand why this upsets me. He says and I quote "I didn't take her there, but I thought it was cute shirt so I bought it for her".

So for starters you are out drinking with your friends drooling over well endowed teenage girls and you thought of your daughter?? And secondly... do you want her to grow up and be one of those girls?

And MOST importantly, why does the Hooter's brand feel the need to make t-shirts to fit a child size 5/6 yr old??

Mind you this is not the first shirt I have had to toss. He also brought home 3 t-shirts from his last trip to nage head. 2 of the 3 were to his favorite bars and I tossed those too.

Am I overreacting to think this i highly inappropriate?

[Kitty]

VERY inappropriate in my opinion. I would think the Daddy of a 6 year old little girl would be protective of her....at least in this day and age. :rolleyes: That t-shirt would be in the garbage! :mad:

[tkrik]

You are not over reacting at all! It is inappropriate. Toss it out.

Just to make you feel better, my ex wanted my girls to be "Sister Centerfolds" in Playboy.:eek:

[mrsD]

I would be very careful HOW you do this for the child.

I would offer a better substitute and let her pick what she wants.

She may feel penalized if you take it away just outright.
Tell her Daddy made a mistake, and other men will laugh at her or something equiv on her level of understanding.

[tkrik]

I would be very careful HOW you do this for the child.

I would offer a better substitute and let her pick what she wants.

She may feel penalized if you take it away just outright.
Tell her Daddy made a mistake, and other men will laugh at her or something equiv on her level of understanding.

Very good point, mrsD! Thank you for posting that.

[SallyC]

DH2B probably thinks it's ok, because it was his brainy:rolleyes:idea. If one of his male friends had bought it for her, he would have punched their lights out.:eek::mad::eek:

[legzzalot]

DD has more clothes than she can remember so I snuck it in with the laundry an tossed it out. She wont miss it. But I found it insulting.

[Dejibo]

Good Grief! tell him that if he wants to buy ANY clothing for her it must have ZERO words on it, or advertizing of any kind. A cute pink shirt is fine, there is no need for it to advertize a pizza joint, or a beer joint.

Have you seen those JUICY statements written across the back door of these 12 year old? Where is their momma?! I would slap the carp out of anyone that put that on my child! Children are target enough without adding bullesye targets to their back doors.

Way to go mom. Dont make a big deal out of it to her, simply lose it in the wash, but make sure to take a bite out of him. NO Advertizing from now on mister!

[TwoKidsTwoCats]

DD has more clothes than she can remember so I snuck it in with the laundry an tossed it out. She wont miss it. But I found it insulting.

Which is probably his intention.. to get your reaction. Don't play his game. Just ignore until he's gone, then get rid of the clothing.

Weird thing, my brother deals with the same with his ex and their daughters. He has full custody. She buys the crappy clothes just to see his reaction.:rolleyes:

:hug:

[ewizabeth]

That man is nuts, I can't believe he bought that. And Tkrik, your ex is doubly nuts. :confused: No wonder they don't have custody!!

[karilann]

What pops into ones mind when one sees that shirt?!!!!
What was he thinking!!!!!
Like its funny that some pervert would look at her and think "ehh ehh...little Hooters girl....ehh ehh" YIKES :thud:

He has got to be a pig
Degrading to women and he wants it on his little girl?

Yep....file T for Trash

[NeuroNixed Craig]

First and foremost, "YOU" are her mother and she lives with "YOU" for a reason, therefore "YOU" have a big responsibility. I commend "YOU" for exercising that serious responsibility and setting an appropriate example.

On the other hand, I can't speak for her dad's behavior because I don't know him or what his true motivation may be behind these inappropriate gifts. At this rate, and I am taking this point to the farthest extreme I hope, he will show up with one of those Abacrombee & Finch "push up" bras designed for girls 7 years and older.

I fully agree with MrsD to have a frank discussion with your daughter why those gifts are inappropriate and follow up with a very firm conversation with the dad leaving no doubt as to the real message. He is supposed to be an adult, which may be, but a responsible dad, I question very seriously.

The above is strictly based on the information you have provided and consist of my personal opinion only. I will not conjecture the meaning or thinking process of the dad, nor do I care to under the circumstances. You just keep doing what you're doing insuring good communication with your daughter.

[Kitty]

On the other hand, I can't speak for her dad's behavior because I don't know him or what his true motivation may be behind these inappropriate gifts. At this rate, and I am taking this point to the farthest extreme I hope, he will show up with one of those Abacrombee & Finch "push up" bras designed for girls 7 years and older.

Please tell me these are not out there being sold. :eek: I've never heard of them and just the thought of it makes me sick. What kind of perverts are designing clothes these days???:mad:

[mrsD]

Where we live there is an epidemic of early puberty for girls.

They are starting their periods at EIGHT or NINE.

http://www.clickondetroit.com/family/11172660/detail.html

A girl at that age may need a bra! (but maybe not a "push up" type yet).

[NeuroNixed Craig]

Please tell me these are not out there being sold. :eek: I've never heard of them and just the thought of it makes me sick. What kind of perverts are designing clothes these days???:mad:

Sorry to say I saw this on CNN's Headline News last week and needless to say, Robin Meade, the anchor, had no sense of humor and nothing good to say about it.

Begs the question, where do we as a society draw the line on this stuff?

[Dejibo]

Did you see some store lately selling "push up" triangle bikini tops for 8 y/o girls? I was stunned! Now they are called "triangle tops" with padding. OMG! you know some weirdo invented that.

[Kitty]

Now I'm glad I don't have daughter's......especially young ones at this time. What on earth is going on with adult's sense of decency. I'm by no means a prude but this is just WRONG.

[legzzalot]

You know it is like the shorts and the pants with the words on the butt. Cutie, hottie, whatever it says, I don't care. I HATE seeing words written on a girls butt. It is just not appropriate.

SO her dad and I had a talk last night about the clothes... after he texts me at 11:30 at night to ask how his girl is doing. When I called to figure out why he was texting me so late at night.... duh, it's friday and he doesn't have DD this weekend.

Guess where he was! Give you a hint.... I threw away a shirt for them yesterday. ugh. Then we had the talk about the shirt. I asked him if he was training her to be a Hooter's girl. I then asked how he would feel if she decided to work for that company when she was older. How would it make you feel to see your baby girl and only child being oggled the way he was doing at that moment.

He called me back 20 minutes later, apparently he decided it was time to go home after that.

It's kind of funny, I am two different people. I sell grown up stuff for a living; this is not a side of me that my children will ever be exposed to. As a mom, I am overbearing and protective. It is my job.

I won't let DD go next door to play with her friends because I have discovered a lack of a filter on the neighbors part. They discuss grown up things in front of the children. I am sorry but I want my little girl to be a little girl right now. A SAFE one at that.

[Dejibo]

I guess many states are arguing about whether or not to restrict under age tanning. Guess what is on the news?? yep, 12 y/o and 14 y/o girls in skimpy binkinis and strutting their stuff. EEEK! Why??? Why would anyone allow their scantily clad child to do that? HAve you seen the fund raisers on the sides of the road to wash your car? All those young girls in bikinis and short shorts, with wet tshirts. EEEK! Dear God where are the parents?!

[tkrik]

Legz, you are a good mom and doing a great job in raising your little one.

It's a struggle when we have to "battle" with the other parent over crap like this. Hang in there and know you are doing a great job.:hug:

[Kitty]

Good grief times have changed. :eek: I wasn't even allowed to shave my legs until I was 16 years old! And tanning??? Of course it wasn't around when I was a teenager but I can tell you I'd not have been allowed to do that either. I do admit to going when I was in my 30's but stopped after a few sessions. I didn't like lying in that coffin type contraption! Plus, we had a pool at home and I got plenty of sun the old fashioned way.

I have to say.......I'm not thrilled at the way society is so accepting of certain trends especially those that affect young children. For goodness sakes let them be kids. They'll grow up fast enough. I remember when the biggest thing I had to worry about at 12 years old was who was going to walk with me to go pick muscadines off the vine on the fence that backed up to our backyard. :rolleyes: I miss those days so much.

[Jules A]

Good grief times have changed. :eek: I wasn't even allowed to shave my legs until I was 16 years old! And tanning??? Of course it wasn't around when I was a teenager but I can tell you I'd not have been allowed to do that either. I do admit to going when I was in my 30's but stopped after a few sessions. I didn't like lying in that coffin type contraption! Plus, we had a pool at home and I got plenty of sun the old fashioned way.

I have to say.......I'm not thrilled at the way society is so accepting of certain trends especially those that affect young children. For goodness sakes let them be kids. They'll grow up fast enough. I remember when the biggest thing I had to worry about at 12 years old was who was going to walk with me to go pick muscadines off the vine on the fence that backed up to our backyard. :rolleyes: I miss those days so much.


One of the units I work is age 12 and under and much to my horror I have had patients that were taken by their parent to get a tattoo. Often these are the same parents that can't afford to put minutes on their pay-as-you-go cell phone or bus fare to come visit their kid. :confused:

It makes me both furious and sad.

[Dejibo]

When I worked in the prisons I would see visitors come in with some extremely inappropriatly dressed children. Little 10 y/o girls with make up, scantly dressed with JUICY written across their backdoor. Belly button shirt and tiny new training bras stuffed with god knows what. How can moms think that allowing a child to come to a PRISON is a good idea like that? We all used to scratch our heads, but then we would see the apple didnt fall far from the tree. mom had 3 inch nails all painted in fresh art, a weave that would pay for my car, a cell phone that was more intelligent than the computer used to check inmates into the system, a designer handbag, and whining about her food stamps being cut since the mister is now in jail. :eek: She was much more interested in attracting a replacement man while hers was gone than seeing that her children were imitating her. Scary stuff.

How can you not see that your child is smelling like sweet strawberry jam to the predators out there? What happened to modesty? decency? Have we truly lost our way? When we allow the most innocent amoung us to become the targets of the sick and depraved we need to re evaluate things. IMHO.

[legzzalot]

Agreed. I want to slap this one kids mom every time I see this girl. She is about 15 or 16. She leaves the house in a pair of boxer shorts... which she rolls the waist down on and the legs up. And these shirts that about 3 sizes too small. And she is a BIG girl. Every day she gets her little brother off the bus while talking on her cell phone very loudly about who she is dating, what they are doing and who is doing what with who.

And the mom... she spends her evenings on the front porch having very similar conversations with her friends. How do I know this? because I can HEAR her loud and clear and she lives acrossed the street and 2 houses down from me.

We are placing bets on who gets knocked up first. It's just sad.

I remember when I was 17, I went with a friend to visit one of her friends. This girl was talking about her sex life with her mom sitting right there. Not only did mom condone it, they laughed about her mom walking in on her and the boyfriend.

I went home that day and hugged my mom and I thanked her for being the over bearing nosy mom who never let me get away with anything. I am so glad I did not turn out like that girl. And my children will never leave the house or prance around IN the house with that crap on.

[Kitty]

When we allow the most innocent amoung us to become the targets of the sick and depraved we need to re evaluate things. IMHO.

It's these parents who are so "hands-off" and lenient who are the first to blame others when something bad happens. :rolleyes: It's the schools fault.....or "society" in general. Kids are going to learn by example. You do it....they do it. Being a parent is a hard job. You have to be both consistent and fair.

[TheSleeper]

3 daughters myself, 20-37, I would have never dreamed of getting them anything like that to wear. Never been in a Hooters, if I go some where to eat? it`s for the food not T&A.