sarey
10-27-2008, 01:30 AM
Well, Hello to you all. Here is my story. I hope it does not bore you.
My parents divorced when I was aged 4. My father stole money from my mother, harassed her after the split up, which led to my mother becoming very distressed. He was in the army, so he was placed in the prison there, and we were moved to a safe house, then later moved to a council flat. I didn't see my father again until many years later.
As a child, I was very mixed up. I first attempted suicide at age 9, though a previous attempt, I'm not sure was intended to kill. I put a doll house plate in my sandwich and I choked on it. I am not sure why. But my first real attempt was strangulation at age 8, or maybe 9, I'm not too clear. I have been a self harmer since age 8, and I have been with CAMHS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services) since that time, I was first referred regarding my explosive behavior. For a few months, I seen someone, and I stopped going as my behavior seemingly was improving. Then I was re-referred regarding my self-harm, and the fact my father had returned back into my life. It's all a big blur, but I remember being very explosive, at one point, I threatened my mother/sister with a knife. Things have been extremely tough.
As the years went on by, things got increasingly worse. In my life time, I have overdosed more than 15 times, some of which have been lethal, some just to cope, some just to even experiment. I have received numerous stitches for my cutting, and I am left with most likely permanent scars. I have been sectioned into a psychiatric ward. I lost my Nan. My father didn't want anything to do with me, he has lied, he has refused to return me home when asked by my mother(which led to a court case, evidently I returned home to my mother), he has broken promises, he has hurt me, though not physically. I am scared of him. He is no father to me.
Previously this year, I was diagnosed with ADHD. I have wrote to my psychiatrist asking her if I have it, or not. She told me my main difficulty was emotional regulation, but that one can have both, and I was taken off the medications for ADHD due to the side effects. She was not all clear in whether or not I have it, so I am awaiting a letter back regarding that.
I am in a special needs school, for those with emotional and behavioral difficulties. It's quite challenging at times, and this is my last year in school. However, I am a school prefect, which is a big achievement.
My mother is an alcoholic, though she is doing much better, still drinking, but has cut down.
I have a sister, she is 18. We have bad days, and good days. She can be pretty nasty at times, and has been very nasty in the past.
Since the age of around 12/13, I have suffered from an ''eating disorder''. It has gone from binging/purging, not eating, restricting, and it goes back and forth between them. I currently see a psychologist who specializes in Eating Disorders.
Because I am underage, I don't think my psychiatrist likes to diagnose under 18's, however, I was diagnosed with ADHD, as I've said, and I may have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and I have Anxiety, which I think, the two clash together.
I am currently 15 years of age, going on 16 this December.
I may have left things out, but I am about to return to bed, if I have forget anything, I'll post again with the forgotten information about my lovely little life.
Thank you all for reading. I do appreciate opinions and feedback. Any questions, please feel free to ask.
xxx
My parents divorced when I was aged 4. My father stole money from my mother, harassed her after the split up, which led to my mother becoming very distressed. He was in the army, so he was placed in the prison there, and we were moved to a safe house, then later moved to a council flat. I didn't see my father again until many years later.
As a child, I was very mixed up. I first attempted suicide at age 9, though a previous attempt, I'm not sure was intended to kill. I put a doll house plate in my sandwich and I choked on it. I am not sure why. But my first real attempt was strangulation at age 8, or maybe 9, I'm not too clear. I have been a self harmer since age 8, and I have been with CAMHS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services) since that time, I was first referred regarding my explosive behavior. For a few months, I seen someone, and I stopped going as my behavior seemingly was improving. Then I was re-referred regarding my self-harm, and the fact my father had returned back into my life. It's all a big blur, but I remember being very explosive, at one point, I threatened my mother/sister with a knife. Things have been extremely tough.
As the years went on by, things got increasingly worse. In my life time, I have overdosed more than 15 times, some of which have been lethal, some just to cope, some just to even experiment. I have received numerous stitches for my cutting, and I am left with most likely permanent scars. I have been sectioned into a psychiatric ward. I lost my Nan. My father didn't want anything to do with me, he has lied, he has refused to return me home when asked by my mother(which led to a court case, evidently I returned home to my mother), he has broken promises, he has hurt me, though not physically. I am scared of him. He is no father to me.
Previously this year, I was diagnosed with ADHD. I have wrote to my psychiatrist asking her if I have it, or not. She told me my main difficulty was emotional regulation, but that one can have both, and I was taken off the medications for ADHD due to the side effects. She was not all clear in whether or not I have it, so I am awaiting a letter back regarding that.
I am in a special needs school, for those with emotional and behavioral difficulties. It's quite challenging at times, and this is my last year in school. However, I am a school prefect, which is a big achievement.
My mother is an alcoholic, though she is doing much better, still drinking, but has cut down.
I have a sister, she is 18. We have bad days, and good days. She can be pretty nasty at times, and has been very nasty in the past.
Since the age of around 12/13, I have suffered from an ''eating disorder''. It has gone from binging/purging, not eating, restricting, and it goes back and forth between them. I currently see a psychologist who specializes in Eating Disorders.
Because I am underage, I don't think my psychiatrist likes to diagnose under 18's, however, I was diagnosed with ADHD, as I've said, and I may have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and I have Anxiety, which I think, the two clash together.
I am currently 15 years of age, going on 16 this December.
I may have left things out, but I am about to return to bed, if I have forget anything, I'll post again with the forgotten information about my lovely little life.
Thank you all for reading. I do appreciate opinions and feedback. Any questions, please feel free to ask.
xxx