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Is there no end

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Unread 11-12-2012, 01:28 AM   #1
Sam
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Default Is there no end

Tonight is low point. Been battleing a breakthough for the past four days. A rescue injection gives me a couple of hours of relief, then it comes right back. My hips feel like they are broken. Swollen, bruised and difficult to move. The rescues are hard on the muscle.

Maybe it sounds stupid or selfish, but I feel that my life is being taken away peice by peice. My job, inability to see my horses (I wanted a horse since I was five, and now that I finally have them, I can't get out to see them). yesterday, another tooth split in half and that half fell out.

Some times it is ovewhelming. There are others with so much more pain than I. I feel as though I don't have the right to be depressed when many people would consider me lucky. Can't help it tonight. I wish tomorrow would not come.

Sam
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Unread 11-12-2012, 08:57 AM   #2
don1956
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Originally Posted by Sam View Post
Tonight is low point. Been battleing a breakthough for the past four days. A rescue injection gives me a couple of hours of relief, then it comes right back. My hips feel like they are broken. Swollen, bruised and difficult to move. The rescues are hard on the muscle.

Maybe it sounds stupid or selfish, but I feel that my life is being taken away peice by peice. My job, inability to see my horses (I wanted a horse since I was five, and now that I finally have them, I can't get out to see them). yesterday, another tooth split in half and that half fell out.

Some times it is ovewhelming. There are others with so much more pain than I. I feel as though I don't have the right to be depressed when many people would consider me lucky. Can't help it tonight. I wish tomorrow would not come.

Sam
hey "sam"please hold in there brother.everyone here feels your pain.we know what your going through.we not saying that to be nice.we really know how you feel physically and emotionally.and we are still going thru it still.you got me and all the others here
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ginnie (11-13-2012)
Unread 11-13-2012, 09:48 AM   #3
waterwillow
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Default Thinking of you

Hi Sam life is one hell of a rollercoaster and it is OK to feel scared and frightened. What we really need now and again is to get off the ride and take a break. Often thats just not possible or seems that way.

Have you anyone who could help you get outside or are you bed bound. There may be an animal sanctuary/ charity near you who would assist you with the care of your animals.

My thoughts are with you, try to think outside the box a bit for distractions and people who can support your passion.

Hope tomorrow is better for you.
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Unread 11-13-2012, 01:00 PM   #4
ginnie
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I am here for you too. I want you to know I care. There are alot of folks here who have gone through depression, those dark places nobody can reach. We are here to listen anytime. Please have hope things can get better. ginnie
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Unread 11-14-2012, 04:53 PM   #5
Leesa
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How are you doing Sam? Are you feeling ANY better at all? I know this awful pain can pull you into the pits of hell, but please hang on.

If your pain is not being controlled, you're going to HAVE to talk to your doctor. You shouldn't have to suffer like this. Get him to DO something!

Remember, he is working for YOU. You need proper pain control, and you deserve it. God bless and keep us informed, ok? Hugs, Lee
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recovering alcoholic, sober since 7-29-93;severe depression; 2 open spinal surgeries; severe sciatica since 1986; epidurals; trigger points; myelograms; Rhizotomy; Racz procedure; spinal cord stimulator implant (and later removal); morphine pump trial (didn't work);now inoperable; lumpectomy; radiation; breast cancer survivor; heart attack; fibromyalgia; on disability.



Often the test of courage is not to die, but to live..
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Unread 11-14-2012, 06:12 PM   #6
bretd
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Originally Posted by Leesa View Post
How are you doing Sam? Are you feeling ANY better at all? I know this awful pain can pull you into the pits of hell, but please hang on.

If your pain is not being controlled, you're going to HAVE to talk to your doctor. You shouldn't have to suffer like this. Get him to DO something!

Remember, he is working for YOU. You need proper pain control, and you deserve it. God bless and keep us informed, ok? Hugs, Lee
Its been a couple days since your post I hope you are feeling better?? I can relate, I did construction for over 20 years, I loved my job and work very hard at it. Now I am luckey to make to the mail box. I use to hunt and fish all the time. My life does suck. I don't know why your teeth are falling out, but mine are too. The main reason is I can't afford a dentist. I wish I could give you words of encourgement. hang in there I hope things get better.
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