If you give them a good food, (not the corn based stuff that is common), like Blue Buffalo or Taste of the Wild, or Iam's ProActive (you can order online and get right to your door), they will not get sick much.
None of our cats got sick much. Sheba lived to 24, Tippy to 20 or so, and Oreo got cancer at 13, and she was the most challenging for treatments.
I think Doydie's and Dejibo's cats are the exceptions, not the rule.
Many rescues take animals from single homes, where the owner has died. In these cases, the cat would be used to an older owner. You could even take a cat as a foster, to see if it works out. Many rescues need foster homes since their resources are limited. If the fostering works, you could keep the kitty. If not, you could return it. The rescue I got Maya from this summer, took in many dogs from owners who passed away...she typically finds homes for most of them. But occasionally she keeps one
You could set up a little platform, for feeding that you can reach.
That way you wouldn't have to feed on the floor. Same with the litterbox, where you could scoop daily and put in a plastic baggie without bending over. Be creative.

Cats don't bark, but a sensitive cat will alert you to someone at the door.. either by getting attentive or running off to hide.
Just sit in your chair, with a string on a stick and dangle it... a good cat toy. I believe cats sleep once adult up to 20 hrs a day.
A healthy cat does not barf much either. I personally don't like the barf issues. Cats have an emotional system that is similar to humans (I read about that once), so working into an empathy and relationship is rather easy. Dogs however, are needy and different, so we prefer cats.
Little Maya is learning about water, the faucets, etc. She is really into dripping water now. It is fun to watch! She is so funny!