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I am not doing well....

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Unread 02-23-2013, 12:21 PM   #31
bizi
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I am still in my jammies one cup of coffee down ready to have another. Was awake when jeff got up and ready to go. His boss picked him up at 8. I stayed in bed and had the weirdest dreams, got up around 9:45 when my back was sore from being in bed so long. It felt good to not have to get up just yet.
I went in and measured the keyboard. It is almost 5 feet wide and the amplifier is 3 feet wide. I think our computer room is only 12 foot square.
If I take down the craft table it would fit there but he would have to reorganize stuff to fit the amplifier( which is a big speaker).
This is about my dislike of change. and lack of control over this and not being included in this process and then having to squeeze this equipment into already cramped room or have it take up 1/3 of the living room which is separate from the rest of the house. We have a seperate family room where we watch tv etc. The living room is not used and is somewhat formal. He already had another big amplifier that he spent a lot of money on specially made for his jazz guitar in the living room. The keyboard is in front of the front door. That we don't use but still.....My house is not in order, it is in disarray.
Think I need to get dressed and start on some of my paperwork.
Thank you all so much for your kind words of support. and yes di coming back from a wonderful cruise is a big let down. and this appears to be the down following a high so this too shall pass. This is part of being bipolar and human. There will need to be change and change is hard for me.
If the equipment is moved into the computer room then I want my own ipad or something that I can use in my office away from that room.
I just remembered....there was a short discussion about him getting headphones to use while playing his keyboard...I had forgotten about this....and now there is this huge amplifier. Can you say loud!...what about my air space!!!!!
I am going to bring this up again.
bizi
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Unread 02-23-2013, 02:23 PM   #32
Mari
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Yes, Bizi,

Talk to him about this equipment. Also talk to him about your thoughts about his bringing in any more equipment in the future.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bizi View Post
This is about my dislike of change. and lack of control over this and not being included in this process
We all have a fundamental need to know what is happening in your own house.
Before you walk into a store or investigate on-line, try out an iPad to see if it can do what you want on it. They do a lot less than a computer and they are slower for some things. You might be o.k. with a little lap top.

Quote:
My house is not in order, it is in disarray.
I hope that you can feel all right about the house soon.

Good luck with the paperwork.

M
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Unread 02-23-2013, 03:04 PM   #33
bizi
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well I took down the art table and moved it into the guest bedroom. I will just sit on the bed if I ever get around to doing art again. The keyboard and amplifier can go in this office now and I will go look at something for myself.
Now he can just close the door and practice in his room.
well I have done something today.
thank you for your support.
bizi
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heavy sigh.....
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Unread 02-23-2013, 03:22 PM   #34
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bizi View Post
Now he can just close the door and practice in his room.
well I have done something today.
Bizi,

You did well. Things are working out well for you today.

M
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Unread 02-23-2013, 05:33 PM   #35
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I am with Mari, you did well. Did you talk to him about how you feel you weren't included in the decision leading up to this equipment coming into your home like this? I would also mention that you thought he'd be practicing with those headphones and just test the water there...Wishing you peace and quiet.
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Unread 02-23-2013, 06:08 PM   #36
mg neck prob
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Hibizi;

Your thread about stopping for sushi---- had me thinking then craving it so i brought some home tonight with a seeweed salad --its was great.

Glad today is better for you--thanks so much for posting that on Katmae. I really appreciated it !!
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Unread 02-23-2013, 09:36 PM   #37
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I would be having a huge issue with this as well. I am glad you got it out of the living room. Hopefully it will stay out of sight, out of mind.
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Unread 02-23-2013, 09:55 PM   #38
bizi
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Oh it is still in the living room just knowing that it won't stay in there is calming.
bizi
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This is harriet, my sweet baby girl.....
heavy sigh.....
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one day at a time....
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Unread 02-24-2013, 05:48 AM   #39
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Bizi,

Keep on doing what works for you.
I hope that Sunday goes well.

Mari
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Unread 02-24-2013, 09:33 AM   #40
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Dear Bizi

thinking about you. haven't posted mch because not sure what to say. No. actually the problem is i have too much to say and not sure how it would all come out.

so for starters let me remind you of the most important things.

i care about you.
i am your friend.
i am reading/listening.

You sound like you have been getting things done. i believe as more things are put to bed you really will feel better.

i must congratulate you on moving the art table. that is a compromise and i also feel for you on that. i actually feel this conflict of equipment and soundspace very deeply on both sides, as i am simultaneously in both your pairs of shoes in regard to "noise." i do believe you two can work it out. please listen to each other's needs and also make sure that each of you expresses your separate needs. i think if you do this, then together you can figure out a comfortable solution.

and here i open the can of worms. i am going to run my mouth hopefully i can stop, in reply to your emphasis early on about what Jeff does. Clearly teaching guitar is what Jeff does. However his music in general seems like much more than a hobby, it seems to describe part or much of who he is. In this case, playing guitar would be his main means of expression - but not the sum total of it. I only know Jeff "by proxy" in a most limited way, so if I'm wrong ignore me, heck, even blast me one if you feel like it! But if i'm right, the keyboard seems to go with the territory - he may even have wanted one for a long time.

Now! Hopefully i did not open Pandora's Box. Back to shutting my trap, which is generally is better kept shut these days. I never know what is going to come out or how much of it once it starts.

I hope today is going well for you and that your emotional skies soon return to a happy hue of bright blue.

Sending lots of s which I invite you to deliver physically upon your person, and liberally so, whenever you feel like you could use one... or five!

love

~ waves ~
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