Afraid of being in public

TBI/PTSD · 02-27-2013, 03:59 AM

Hi, I have never posted on the PTSD site for some reason but here goes. I have been around since about Aug 2011. I had a fifth concussion which caused my TBI and PTSD. I CAN'T BE IN PUBLIC. I go to the hospital three days per week and I try very hard to get to the doctors two min or so before my appt. oh my God, if the doc is running behind, it is sheer torture. I sweat, shake, and stutter.

I was at the hospital two days ago and the doc was like 15 min behind. I pace and pace. I decided to go in a secluded corner. My service dog was laying facing outward, I was crouching over him facing the corner and petting him to calm down. This guy came up behind me, Trip, my service dog growled, as he should. I know this guy was trying to approach me because he was starring at Trip. There were 49 chairs available and he said he had to sit right where we were. I said "I think my body language indicated that I didn't want to be approached." Of course he said I wasn't approaching you. Then he said this is a public place, I told him that the public space I was in was taken. If people have a service dog, can't the public figure out that maybe the handler doesn't have all their ducks in a row? I have do another pet signs 2" x 8" on both sides of him. I wear sun glasses, look at the ground. My dog isn't there for kids to pet or for people to tell me their experiences with dogs. I know Trip happens to be very handsome. I stay home more now than ever. I don't know joy anymore. I don't want to talk to the very few people I used to let in my circle. I can't. I have torturous nightmares so I don't want to go to sleep. I am on a bunch of Meds but still suffer from this.

Snoopy · 02-27-2013, 11:50 AM

Hi TBI/PTSD,

Agoraphobia can be part of the PTSD. Unfortunately, strangers really are not going to understand or comprehend the "place" you are in and you can't expect them to.

It's wonderful you have a service dog to help you. Do you like music? If you do --- take a ipod with you and play your favorite music. This allows you to focus more on your music than your surroundings which could help you to relax. This is not a miracle and can take several tries before you see any benefit.

I had someone with me when I first started to try and get out but people have their own lives and I could not expect someone to change their lives to suit mine.

My therapist suggested going into stores or anywhere where there is alot of people. Before I left my car I would put in my head phones and find the music that I wanted. It was so hard and scary, I hated going anywhere but I knew I needed to work through this.

I probably spent about a year where I never left my house without my music, it went everywhere I went. Little by little I did do better getting out, although even after 10 years I still sometimes struggle to leave the house...but I do.

I hope in time you can find peace in your life

mg neck prob · 02-27-2013, 11:59 AM

Hi welcome,

Im sorry that happend to you its got to be hard a very good friend who doesnt leave her home either and suffers the same as you. The guy who tripped over your dog is a idiot. I dont suffer with the same thing you do-- but I never got how people will sit next to you like a dr office and there a million chairs opened. It does feel very invasive --i know in my head im also like yelling at the person for real-- ur going to sit next to me WHY? Just to be annoying. People dont pay attention or care to pay atention to the obvious which is dis-respectful --so im glad u said something to him. Im glad you joined this forum you will find alot of support.

katmae · 02-27-2013, 12:40 PM

I can honestly say that I know how you feel about being in public,I have not left my home alone in meany years it was not so bad when my childern were at home but now they are grown with lives or there own they only people I let in my home are my childern, grandkids and my stepfather I only leave twice a month to pay bills and food shopping and I have to have one of them with me,I am glad that you have a dog and people that don't understand that he has a job to do ,beleave me I would never get close to you I'm scard to death of dogs,but thats a whole other can of worms,I too am on a lot of meds but nothing I have tryed works very much for that

TBI/PTSD · 02-28-2013, 04:03 AM

I like the music idea but I need to be connected to Trip, my dog and. Feel that with the music, I won't be. I HAVE to be on high alert of my surroundings. I don't know why I didn't start posting here straight away but I am glad I am now. Thank you so much. Oh, Trip can sense people that are afraid of him, particularly those who are afraid and act like they aren't. Thanks. I have To. Go to the Endo for a root canal today....wish me luck having some one in my face and me having no control.

Snoopy · 02-28-2013, 06:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TBI/PTSD

I HAVE to be on high alert of my surroundings.

I understand you need to be tuned in to Trip. However, being on "high alert" is part of PTSD. When you can "be aware" and not on "high alert" of your surroundings you will be making progress. Listening to music very low, if it is soothing to you and focusing on Trip can help you to not be on high alert.

Those of us with PTSD feel we need to always be on alert, if we aren't something could happen. I can't even being to tell how much better life can feel, how much better you could feel if you were not always on alert.

I don't know how long you have had PTSD but I can tell you being on "high alert" all the time for years can take it's toll on your health and mind.

Be well

katmae · 02-28-2013, 08:10 AM

I do wish you all the luck at dentest today,have you ever tryed medation? this helps me a little when I have to do things like that,can you take your dog with you?I wish that I had a saport animal I think it would help.have a good day

Snoopy · 02-28-2013, 08:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by katmae

have you ever tryed medation? this helps me a little when I have to do things like that,

I agree with katmae.

Mindful meditation can be very helpful. Do you see a Psychotherapist? Does he or she help you with coping skills?

katmae · 02-28-2013, 06:30 PM

how was your day? I hope that it was a good one for you,how was the dentest?I really hope that was ok, I know how stressing that can be not just the leaveing your home but to have people right in your face and tutching you hope your ok

ginnie · 02-28-2013, 07:19 PM

I am glad you found this site. We care. All of us on NT, have issues either with physical, mental, or emotional health. Nobody here will dismiss you or be mean. I think the music idea is a good one. I wish you the very best, and hope that what ever life brings you in the future, you will have a friend here. Glad you have a service dog too, they save peoples lives. ginnie