Thanks. This is my life... I have a psychiatrist, psychologist, ocular physical therapist, vestibular therapy will start soon,physical therapist and I think that is all. Thanks for the saying that I can keep my wall up. I am not ready to even start nudging the stones. I hope that some day I will, just not today. Also, since my life changes in 2011, I haven't worked since. I goto the doctor. I am single and take care of my house and all that goes along with Trip's care. That takes a lot out of me. I think my neighbors/friends think that since I don't work, I sit around waiting for an invitation. They try to get me out of my house. I appreciate their care but really I think that since so much of my life before all of this has been on someone else's terms. I want it to be on my terms. Like it would be ok if I asked them to do something on my terms but I don't feel like doing things currently. Another thing...when I see my neighbors, out of concern, they cock their heads and ask..."is today a good day?" That makes me want to go for their jugular because it takes me right back to my misery. I need to tell them that is would be better for me if they treated me like a neighbor and not a sickly neighbor.
Today I need to go to Ikea and get more curtains to match the curtains I have in my home. I sweat at the thought. I get anxious at the thought if being in the small spaces, the kids there wanting to pet Trip despite his do not pet signs. I will wear sunglasses and try the music. I used to go to yoga regularly. I love the studio but the classes are at times that I can't get to with my dr appts and volunteer hrs. So I joined a gym around the corner that I go to regularly. I can practice yoga at home, yes....that is what I will do. Thanks for listening.