Hi Darkside ~ Boy, I can understand what you're going thru. It sounds to me like "misery loves company." I suspect your husband drinks and he wants some company, right? He doesn't want to drink alone! Is this true?
The same was true of my now "ex." I got sober, and he didn't. When I was drinking, I too was a blackout drinker. I didn't know what I did EVER. I couldn't remember anything. I drank heavily for 20 years, and my poor kids had to watch me be a drunk. When I got sober, I made the best amends I could to my kids, and thank God they forgave me. But my husband didn't like the idea that I wasn't drinking anymore. In fact, he'd ask me to mix HIM drinks all the time!!! I told him where to go, cause that's just plain cruel when you're trying to get sober.
I went to meetings every night for 90 days, and sometimes twice a day. I got into service work, I worked the steps. I got a sponsor and did what I was told. This year by the grace of God, I'll be celebrating 17 years clean/sober. So it can be done!!! You dont HAVE to have your husband's support. You just need to know that you have your meetings for support, your Higher Power, and you need to have faith in yourself. You CAN do this!
Best of luck and God bless and remember ~ keep on keepin on. Hugs, Lee