strange question

[leenewton1]

hi,
my stepson is adhd,he is 10 years old,we have had a lot of trouble with him in the past but now we aknowledged the problem so we got him on the right medication,just about all the problems went away apart from one,i have watched him many a times do this.every time he has to go anywhere he seems to get a rise out of making us mad before he goes,for example and this is just one of many,he had a basketball game,he loves to play but every game, he does the same thing before he goes,he starts to argue and basically make trouble for his mum and i,this is everything,school in the morning,games or any event,visiting family.one particular event that happened was my wife and i had made plans to go to the cinema one night,he had plans to go to his friends,he made his plans before we did but that day he found out that we was going to the cinema he started saying im not going anywhere tonight,which basically stopped us from our cinema plans,i know there maybe a little jealousy but i just wondered what people thought about this?is this part of adhd or is it something else??its very frustrating and he seems to do it to his mother more than me,im sure he just likes to see us ****** off,like he gets a kick out of it.
any replies would be appreciated
thanks lee,sorry about the long post

[Chemar]

Lee
I really dont have answers for you on this but I do want to welcome you to NeuroTalk

it gets a bit quiet here over the weekends but I am sure others will be along to give their input for you

My unqualified feeling is this is likely something that is linked to his condition rather than just a conscious effort to rile you..........like maybe as he gets excited about stuff, something like oppositional defiance kicks in?

I will be interested to hear what others think

[connor]

hi i see your thread i have a nephew with exact behavioral problems it sounds like minipulation to see where his bounderies are and to test the waters of whose the boss.if i were in the situation i would of had him come with you or follow with consequences for the inapropriate behavior.

[leenewton1]

thanks connor,
yes i agree he is a very minipulative child,that kind of confirms it for me really and yes i do discipline him accordingly,it is a big problem with him thinking he is the man of the house over me.when my wifes ex husband left my wife and her son were left alone for quite a while so i think he thinks he is the man of the house.
thanks again.

lee

[michael178]

It sounds like this a learned behavior. If so, I can be unlearned.

[colombiangirl1]

Everyone who's replied so far, sounds to be right on the money to me. It definitely sounds like he's testing the waters. Just seeing what he can get away with.

-Cgirl-

[prettynpinkk]

I am sorry but I have to disagree with everyone. But let me just add that I di dnot read all of everyones post.


You say he ONLY does this mostly when you guys are about to leave. Maybe it's something unconsciencly that happened in his past that makes it difficult to seperate from his mother. I do not think he has post tramtic stress but just because he does not have it does not mean he can not show a sign of it. I am 28yr, and for some reason everytime I get around my mother I start acting like a 14yr old. Still trying to figure out why. I have a few ideas but it takes along time to fugure things out like this.

Good luck

[MsBees]

I'm not sure if it is manipulative. He could be anxious about doing things out side of the home, or transitioning from one thing to another and lashes out at those closes to him because of his anxiety.