A bright star who brings a fresh breeze to our neck of the ether woods..... [come to think of it, I remember very well the ether "taste" when at six I had tonsillectomy....... there I go again...
I'll beg right along with Rae, encourage along with James, support along with Nanc that today is only the first day in the rest of your life!!! What new wonders will tomorrow bring!! Imagine, just years ago, there was no technology such as we now discuss; HECK, discussions like this could not even occur a few years back [ever grateful Dr. John]!!!
So, yesterday we learned I did not have CRPS, no bone cancer, not the heebie geebies, just good old Ben Franklinesque chronic GOUT of the lower legs and feet. HAH!!! Well, stim does nothing for that. Additionally, that right arm I have been complaining about.... well, the nerve is on its way away down south in dixie..... I no longer have grip in my dominant hand, the whole arm hurts like a migraine all day every day. I am not given hope for the arm.
BUT, I have a good left arm, so I can learn to write my signature with that one. There is a bright side. Somehow, somewhere there is a bright side in your situation...... AND I am feeling So Very Sad the Trial just could not be done for you, precluding the attempt at a permanent stim implant. I pray for you dear Kelly..... you are on my mind.
A counsellor is a good approach along with the meds to control depression and anxiety, and boy howdy do I KNOW THAT!! Right Rae? Fiona? How well we remember those dark days and nights. Nights I lay awake and awake wanting IT all to end. I am so glad God jumped in the middle of my funk, or I would not be able to deliver these words to you.
Somehow there will come to be a way to work with and in spite of the pain you live. Yes, we all live pain as you well know..... each in our own way. Pain may be allowed to swallow up that light at the end of the tunnel OR convince us it is in fact a train racing in our direction..... BUT we can demand to live our best in spite of the D A R N E D [sorry Dr. John] pain. I really and truly wanted to swear there, but I have not learned Eva's way around that dang fooled censor thing
Kelly, you have my deep respect for your strength of will, determination, perspective to recognize warning signs and seek out help when you need it most. YOU demonstrate a deep well of character worth there!!
My prayers are with you in this particular quest,