This is the first forum I have ever joined. Have had lumbar damage for about 10 years involving trauma (x3) and degenerative disc disease. Tried everything and am so desperate to have a life am actually considering the knife. Guess I should say I am a 51 year old female on disabilbity for 6-7 years now (Texas). My old PMD had me on methadone and hydocodone. She quit coz of Medicare, and I have been in the search from hell. Have seen 4 other docs settling on the last, altho I'm still not happy till he ups the morphine. Right now it's 60mg/day plus flexeril. If I eat the whole dose at one time I can actually stand long enough to shower.. Next appt is May 8. Last appt removed neurostimulator after traumatic experience. I have no lumbar disks, so he stuck the needle thru verbrae and I was actually screaming as he kept ordering "More morphine", "More Valium", "More morphine" . . . now, THAT was a 10 . . . Will welcome any advice, experiences, feelings, criticism, anecdotes, references in Texas (or Las Cruces, NM). Thanks for listening.