Lots of hugs
I do not understand why he is having surgery now. It is not possible to have both adults recovering at the same time when there are young children in the house. Has his surgeon's office arranged for child care and housekeeping and cooking for the family? Has he surgeon's office come up with a plan that includes the needs of the household?
Please let your psychiatrist and therapist know that stressful things are happening now and that you are feeling in need of extra help from them both.
Perhaps you and your husband could have a talk about how the cooking, chid care, and housework will be accomplished when you are both in recovery from surgery. He needs to think through how realistic the situation is.
Things you both can discuss:
1. Rescheduling his foot surgery until the end of July or later when your restrictions have been lifted
2. Getting relatives to stay with you or visiting daily
3. Hiring some help, especially with cooking and cleaning
4. Finding out about social services available to you both in your area
5. Getting help with babysitting.
Think about what needs to happen in your household so that you can feel good about yourself during this time. Planning can make things easier. The goal is always to feel safe. You are the one holding the family together and you need to feel 100% satisfied that the plan works for you.