I would love to hear your opinions... Dont know if this belongs here...

[BlueMajo]

Thanks for your words Billie.

We were only friends in answer to your question

[carolynpolack]

Hello you,
Doesn't it seem that sometimes people change and suddenly have no room in their life for you any longer? Like you were their surrogate until they got into a serious relationship? That's not healthy. There are people that balance their friends and their love partners or even afflictions. It's just my opinion, but you are very young, and there are many people who are living a somewhat similar lifestyle as you, even if you have a debilitating affliction. I am 50 years young, sensitive and deep, no kids of my own, except myself in a way. People my age just don't get me, if you know what I mean. They are just living different lives, the conventional, stereotypical life.
I hope you find support in your area, more than just talking online. I have to work on the "social isolation is rather equal to spiritual isolation" thing.
Talk to me anytime - Carolyn

Originally Posted by BlueMajo

Hi again dear all,

I dont know if it is correct to post this here, if not, please delete my post...

I wanted, I needed to share with you what Im feeling right now...

I had this friend I used to love, to talk with all day, to think about it all day... We used to get along very well, we traveled together... we did crazy things just to be together, like, you know, avoiding exams, missing classes, saving money like crazy, etc...
Suddenly, he found "his perfect girl" and decided to get married next april... He is so different now... his interests are others... She has nothing to do with me... I feel extremely sad because I miss him so much and I thought he felt the same things about me...
I dont talk to him anymore... everything happened to quickly... I miss him a lot and cant imagine, I mean, I dont want to see him married... with children... he is 26 like me...

What to do ? I mean, what to do to support this ??? I simply cant beleive this is happening... I cry all nights... feel abandoned... dont know...

I want to see him again, but at the same time, I would love to simply erase him from my brain...

And then I remember the good times and keep asking why is he getting married ??? What Am I gonna do ?

Too sad.

Sorry for long post.

[BlueMajo]

Thank you Carolyn.

Precisly last night I dreamed with him... Aw... felt so nostalgic....

[michael178]

He is getting married for the same reasons you will have when you get married. Be happy for him.
And forget about him.

[BlueMajo]

I never thought I would bring this thread back...

I just feel the same way like when I posted this...

Another man... same story... I always feel rejected and abandoned... will I ever find a man for me ??

[Arell]

Originally Posted by BlueMajo

Hi again dear all,

I dont know if it is correct to post this here, if not, please delete my post...

I wanted, I needed to share with you what Im feeling right now...

I had this friend I used to love, to talk with all day, to think about it all day... We used to get along very well, we traveled together... we did crazy things just to be together, like, you know, avoiding exams, missing classes, saving money like crazy, etc...
Suddenly, he found "his perfect girl" and decided to get married next april... He is so different now... his interests are others... She has nothing to do with me... I feel extremely sad because I miss him so much and I thought he felt the same things about me...
I dont talk to him anymore... everything happened to quickly... I miss him a lot and cant imagine, I mean, I dont want to see him married... with children... he is 26 like me...

What to do ? I mean, what to do to support this ??? I simply cant beleive this is happening... I cry all nights... feel abandoned... dont know...

I want to see him again, but at the same time, I would love to simply erase him from my brain...

And then I remember the good times and keep asking why is he getting married ??? What Am I gonna do ?

Too sad.

Sorry for long post.

I had a friend like that, we did everything together, went everywhere together, most of the people round thought we were a couple but the physical side of things just never seemed to happen. We were like twins and I couldn't imagine not having him with me then, new years eve 2000 I realised that although he was the best friend I'd ever had and was ever likely to have if I wanted a husband and children I'd have to give up on my dream of our relationship changing.
We never discussed it, I just found someone (via a chatroom) that I got on with, we met and within 18 months I'd married him. My friend, he said nothing, if he had maybe everything would have changed but he never said wait, stop, what about me, so I figured he didn't want me and I was doing the right thing in finding someone else.
I married, had my first child (who took her first steps to my friend). When I told him I was pregnant the 2nd time he left the country and we still stayed the best of friends, texting/emailing/phoning etc.
Three years ago he came to visit and stay with me for the last time, we hugged as he left and 8 months later was killed on his motorbike. After he died a mutual friend told me how much he loved me and always had and I still grieve every day for his loss and I wonder how things could have been if either of us had had the courage to broach the subject but we didn't. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, I love the way my life has gone with my children but always in the back of my head there will be a little voice asking what could have been.

[Rio1]

Originally Posted by GmaSue

Dear Blue,

I am so sorry you are having sad times right now.
Besides the loss of your friend's companionship, I wonder if part of the trauma you are feeling is because he was your main support system. When you have constant pain and lack of energy (Fibromyalgia, in other words, LOL) you often find someone or something that will help pull you up and give you more energy and to help distract you from the pain. So if that person or thing is suddenly snatched away form you, it can affect your whole life so much.

Maybe one of the best things you could do to feel better would be to try to find somone or a couple of people and/or some new hobby or activity that would fill that empty spot left by your friend. Try to think of someone or something else that can help lift you out of pain and give you the inspiration to do things. Or if you already have a hobby or something your really like to do-pamper yourself and give yourself permission to do it more often for awhile.

Good luck, fellow Fibromite, hang in there!!!

Love your Papillion!!