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Hi... Umm my Mother has 3 brain aneurysms and an AVM, looking for a little help...

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Unread 02-03-2009, 12:35 AM   #1
maggs440
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Default Hi... Umm my Mother has 3 brain aneurysms and an AVM, looking for a little help...

Hi,
My Mom on labor day of 2008 had a brain aneurysm bleed. She was life flighted to University hospitals in Cleveland Ohio where they coiled 2 of the aneurysms, her recovery was very fast and she was out of the hospital withing 3 weeks. They took care of my mom's AVM(its like a tangled mass of veins in her brain) on December 5th 2008 in a 2 surgery process. This was by far the worst experience of my life, after the first surgery my mother did not recognize any of her family and acted like a small child. They took her in for the removal of the AVM on December 6th and she came out much better than the first, she knew her own name and most of her family. But our last trial was an aneurysm that had not burst that needed to be clipped. This surgery was scheduled for January 5th 2009, this surgery seemed to be the easiest of them all... but after my mom had recovered she was different, it was like someone else was in her body. My mom was my best friend and now she won't even really talk to me, she is more irritable and just all around unpleasant. She used to be everyone's best friend! She usually worked seconds but now she wakes up late and goes to bed early! I don't know what to do! Its ripping my family apart. I was wondering if anyone has had an experience close to this? I hope with time she will become more of what she used to be, but I don't know what to think. Please someone help.
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Unread 02-03-2009, 07:54 AM   #2
Nancy0708
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maggs440 View Post
Hi,
My Mom on labor day of 2008 had a brain aneurysm bleed. She was life flighted to University hospitals in Cleveland Ohio where they coiled 2 of the aneurysms, her recovery was very fast and she was out of the hospital withing 3 weeks. They took care of my mom's AVM(its like a tangled mass of veins in her brain) on December 5th 2008 in a 2 surgery process. This was by far the worst experience of my life, after the first surgery my mother did not recognize any of her family and acted like a small child. They took her in for the removal of the AVM on December 6th and she came out much better than the first, she knew her own name and most of her family. But our last trial was an aneurysm that had not burst that needed to be clipped. This surgery was scheduled for January 5th 2009, this surgery seemed to be the easiest of them all... but after my mom had recovered she was different, it was like someone else was in her body. My mom was my best friend and now she won't even really talk to me, she is more irritable and just all around unpleasant. She used to be everyone's best friend! She usually worked seconds but now she wakes up late and goes to bed early! I don't know what to do! Its ripping my family apart. I was wondering if anyone has had an experience close to this? I hope with time she will become more of what she used to be, but I don't know what to think. Please someone help.
Hi- After the first coiling of my biggest annie in July 08 my daughter said I was different. I explained that this was a life changing experience, and we gradually got through the changes and things are back to normal. I just had a clipping on my 2nd annie on Jan 27 09, I am home, no real changes, just letting the brain heal. It is very hard to keep low and let the healing process take over. Your Mom may have some personality changes during this, and I don't blame her. please be patient, it may take up to 6 months or more for her to adjust, just love her, and try to roll with the punches, things will calm down. Nancy
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Unread 02-03-2009, 12:00 PM   #3
Ruthie1959
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Hi Maggs,
Wow, your Mom has been through ALOT in a very short time, not to mention she had a bleed! This is all very shocking to the brain and body not to mention her mental capacity to accept it all. Be patient with her and give her lots of love. The sleeping part is completely normal and much needed to heal, so let her sleep as much as she wants. She sounds like an amazing woman that has been through alot, give her lots of gentle hugs and encouragement, things will improve with time,
Ruthie
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Unread 02-04-2009, 09:42 AM   #4
maggs440
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Your words are so comforting! I know it takes time, I guess we will just have to wait and see and hopefully everything will be back to a somewhat normal state.Thank you so much!
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Unread 02-06-2009, 08:39 PM   #5
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Hi, Maggs440!:

"My mom was my best friend..."


This quote just leapt from the page for me and I just want to comfort you. You are, afterall, the one posting here and asking for something.

My best friend, my husband, had a bleeding brain aneurysm. It was operated on, tied and he lived.

What you need to do is take care of you. Know that there are many of us who are and have adjusted to this kind of life devastation! I am for you.

Take as long as you want to face and recover from the shock and the ongoing concerns.

I have taken a very long time to get to where I am and have done many, many things to cope (not all healthy). The healthy ones work best. There is no cup of coffee, tea or holiday that is going to make the recovery time better. Only time will, one day at a time! It will take many times of caring for you, more than I or you can count but you must continue to care for yourself and let others pamper you too.

I know your love for you mom is still there and her love for you is there too. It's just that it's transformed. So, now, you will need to change the way you love her. It will be better than ever! You won't be able to measure it with what it looked like before. It will have a new look!

Bye for now,
HB
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Unread 04-25-2011, 01:59 PM   #6
ashelizbridges
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Maggie--
My name is Ashley and I'm so sorry to hear of the pain you and your mother have experienced from this episode. My mother, too, suffered from a burst cerebral aneurysm and it affected her personality and emotions.

I'd love to speak with you, both for personal reasons and because I'm working on an article about aneurysms' effects on personality and emotion. Like I'm sure you know, it's difficult to find thorough, trustworthy information on this subject. It is my hope that by telling our stories we can all help one another, our loved ones, and other families who are going to experience this heartwrenching event.

Please shoot me an email at *please PM member for info* At the least, I want you to know you are in my thoughts and prayers and to hear how you are.

(I would also love to hear from Ruthie, Nancy, or any other survivor or their families. These stories need telling to help other families cope and gain support for everyone affected. Please reach out.)

Ashley
Quote:
Originally Posted by maggs440 View Post
Hi,
My Mom on labor day of 2008 had a brain aneurysm bleed. She was life flighted to University hospitals in Cleveland Ohio where they coiled 2 of the aneurysms, her recovery was very fast and she was out of the hospital withing 3 weeks. They took care of my mom's AVM(its like a tangled mass of veins in her brain) on December 5th 2008 in a 2 surgery process. This was by far the worst experience of my life, after the first surgery my mother did not recognize any of her family and acted like a small child. They took her in for the removal of the AVM on December 6th and she came out much better than the first, she knew her own name and most of her family. But our last trial was an aneurysm that had not burst that needed to be clipped. This surgery was scheduled for January 5th 2009, this surgery seemed to be the easiest of them all... but after my mom had recovered she was different, it was like someone else was in her body. My mom was my best friend and now she won't even really talk to me, she is more irritable and just all around unpleasant. She used to be everyone's best friend! She usually worked seconds but now she wakes up late and goes to bed early! I don't know what to do! Its ripping my family apart. I was wondering if anyone has had an experience close to this? I hope with time she will become more of what she used to be, but I don't know what to think. Please someone help.

Last edited by Chemar; 04-25-2011 at 02:08 PM. Reason: NT guidelines for new members
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Unread 05-20-2011, 01:23 PM   #7
cdupree
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maggs440 View Post
Hi,
My Mom on labor day of 2008 had a brain aneurysm bleed. She was life flighted to University hospitals in Cleveland Ohio where they coiled 2 of the aneurysms, her recovery was very fast and she was out of the hospital withing 3 weeks. They took care of my mom's AVM(its like a tangled mass of veins in her brain) on December 5th 2008 in a 2 surgery process. This was by far the worst experience of my life, after the first surgery my mother did not recognize any of her family and acted like a small child. They took her in for the removal of the AVM on December 6th and she came out much better than the first, she knew her own name and most of her family. But our last trial was an aneurysm that had not burst that needed to be clipped. This surgery was scheduled for January 5th 2009, this surgery seemed to be the easiest of them all... but after my mom had recovered she was different, it was like someone else was in her body. My mom was my best friend and now she won't even really talk to me, she is more irritable and just all around unpleasant. She used to be everyone's best friend! She usually worked seconds but now she wakes up late and goes to bed early! I don't know what to do! Its ripping my family apart. I was wondering if anyone has had an experience close to this? I hope with time she will become more of what she used to be, but I don't know what to think. Please someone help.
I am an AVM Survivor...mine ruptured the day before my 16th birthday. It was a change for me, especially the first year. I was a different person, and depressed a lot. The stroke threw me back into a 6th grade levelfor the first few months. I laughed like a child and went back to playing with barbie dolls. I think my nephew, who was 8 years of age at that time, was the only person I felt normal around. It can take years to overcome it, but meeting people in support groups can make a big difference. When my avm ruptured, there was not an internet at that time in 1985, so there were no support groups for my parents and I here in East Texas. In 2007 an AVM survivor started the website "AVMSURVIVORS.ORG" It is an awesome support group. You would not believe how many people in and outside of the US have or had an AVM. If your mom has not connected with that website, please tell her about it.
I'm sorry I didn't respond sooner,but I just joined this website today. Please let me know how your mother is doing today. Take care!
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Unread 09-06-2011, 07:40 AM   #8
Jeanm1963
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Just looking for some support here , On August 10th my mom suffered a aneurysm, we were watching TV and she said she was going to bed, about 5 minutes later my daughter heard her say OH GOD and she opened her door and fell on the floor, we called 911 and she was transported to the hospital.. luckily she was met but a very good surgeon who performed a coiling. She spent 2 weeks in ICU a few days in a step down neuro unit and now is in rehab. She knows everyone, able to speak and we are blessed she can use her arms and legs.. She is still not able to walk or find her balance. She is afraid to walk, she does not really participate in OT because she has such a short attention span she forgets what she is supposed to do. She is 69 so she is very weak and can barely stand on the walking support unit. Yesterday was a weird day, she was out of it, it seems like she went 4 steps backwards, she forgot the president, could not remember my brothers last name and it really scared me. I know its only been 3 weeks but its so hard to look at a person who looks healthy and know thats your mother and now she is unable to do most things. She does NOT eat because while in the step down unit she choked on a HUGE pill and now she is afraid she will choke. They put her on a liquid diet yesterday. She does know most everything about her life, my brother and I, her grand children, her social security number, her address etc... her left side much weaker then her right... Just wondering if anyone else was not able to walk for a while or find their balance??? Im just so happy she survived and Ill take her however I can get her .... Just wondering if anyone will share their story!
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